Bottoms Up

I recently rented out this film as an act to cover up all the boring lives me and my brain have had during the extended holidays, and this film, I hoped would cheer me up. Wrong.

I have seen more than enough films about people who want to do what this film does, and that was the first Mistake I made during my selection. The second one was, seeing Paris Hilton starring in it, because I've see, from House of Wax that she doesn't try hard to make her characters look well up on screen. The final mistake I made, was not checking on what critics had said.

Do not go rent this film because you will be disappointed.

1/10 (And that's being generous)

This movie is awful! I would rather stab myself in the face for ten years with the blunt end of a pencil than have to sit through this awful, awful, awful, awful movie again. I can't believe I made it all the way through once. This movie was worse than watching a plate of dog poo for an hour and a half. I will set my TV on fire if anyone ever tries to watch this movie on it again. Paris Hilton was obviously sent from a horrible, cold planet of untalented heiresses who have billions of dollars they didn't earn and don't deserve, in order to destroy our planet by getting us to watch horrible, boring garbage like this until we all kill ourselves out of horrified boredom. Then they will move in and make earth shitty like their planet and continue making awful movies.

I've been a big Jason Mewes fan since watching "Clerks" back in 1994 and have followed his career by watching the "View Askewniverse" films for the past decade, so I was excited to see Jason playing a different character than the one he's been playing all these years, but unfortunately this film was tainted with Paris Hilton's atrocious acting, which unfortunately spoils the whole film. The premise of the story resembles something you'd expect to see on Nickelodeon "The son goes to Hollywood to save his Fathers restaurant and falls in love." If you're a Jason Mewes fan watch this film he was really good in it, but if you not, or never heard of him, avoid this film like the plague it's truly remarkable how bad this film is.

I've noticed a goof in this film.

Paris Hilton is listed as one of the actors in the move which is strange as she's so wooden I thought someone had thrown a chair onto the screen.

Possibly the worst movie I've ever had the unfortunate experience to see...! Why people hire Paris Hilton and think she will draw a crowd is beyond me. I think its because these people are genuinely brain dead and have no talent to speak of.

Clearly a movie bank rolled by people who have too much cash and too little ideas.

So lets pull together - mail your mates and make this the no1 worst movie of all time to show the idiots who come up with this stuff were sick of it.

"Bottoms Up" definitely deserved it's fate. It's an unfunny mess.

Jason Mewes plays Owen, who is a bartender. His Dad's bar is about to close because of money problems. Then out of the blue, Owen sees there's a "King of The Bar" contest in California. He applies, but doesn't win, and now he needs to get the money fast. He meets Lisa Mancini (Hilton) and blackmails her to be popular.

It's a very stupid plot, with the choppiest editing I've seen in awhile. There's no buildup, or segue into scenes, There are plot holes and there is dialogue missing. And the "Golden Palace.Com" plug was the most shameless plug ever. "Hey man, I have an idea, let's win some money at Golden Palace.Com!" says one character.

Also why does Paris have blonde hair on the cover, but she's a brunette in the film? Jason Mewes was trying his hardest to breathe life into his character, but the script let him down. Paris Hilton was also trying... but not too hard though. She's basically playing herself. It's funny when other characters call her "A whore". Truth in jest perhaps? Let's not mince words: "Bottoms Up" is terrible.

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