Bloodsuckers

#1 Vampires vs. Humans

#2 Military-reject roughneck squad as first responders to dangerous, unknown Vampire incursions.

#3 Sexy female Vampire on the side of the "good guys".

#4 Plenty of gore and action.

There are four (4) major plot devices that may help you decide if you want to watch this movie. If you want all four, then the next plot device may not deter you...

#5 In outer space.

That last one almost got me too, but I'm glad I watched. In a pile of terrible direct-to-video horror that is the Sci-Fi channel Halloween marathon... this movie is a breath of fresh air. It will stand-up against any of the other Sci-Fi channel offerings, and even against the other Vampire movie Natassia starred in (who keeps giving Uwe Boll money?).

I give this movie a 3 as it is worse than the cult movies that deserve a proper 2. It does not make sense to you? Well, it doesn't have to. This is another vampire movie with a stupid plot, no, let me rephrase, incredibly idiotic plot, where space cowboys (complete with cowboy hats) battle a space race of moron vampires.

Does it get any uglier than this? The only good thing in this movie was Natassia Malthe, with her stunning Norwegian beauty. God, I wish Michael Ironside and the DeLuise brothers would stop accepting dumb roles in dumb movies! I mean, at least SeaQuest was nice! I know Mr. Ironside from a lot of movies, he has acted in 164 movies at this date!! It's true that he was rarely in a major role, but still!

Man has been to the farthest reaches of the earth and now he is traveling to new worlds. But with new worlds come ancient evils... the vampires of space. And not just a handful but entire tribes. In this film (which I saw as "Bloodsuckers" but I guess also goes as "Vampires Wars") we see what happens when the imperialist earthlings meet the imperialist vampires.

I will make this review very short because it's undeserving of a good review. The best I can say for this film is it has a good cast of b-list and upcoming stars. Natassia Malthe was Quintana, and was far more attractive here than in "Bloodrayne 2". Michael Ironside is Muco, and is always a fan favorite (as I say, he's the poor man's Jack Nicholson). And we even get Carrie-Ann Fleming as "Damian's wife", who horror fans will now recognize as the eponymous Jenifer from Dario Argento's "Jenifer". So this movie, as bad as it is, isn't without some names attached... but the same can be said of Uwe Boll's work.

The concept of the military tracking and killing vampires in space isn't necessarily a bad idea, but it easily falls into the realm of "cheese" and this film falls hard. The acting, especially from the vampires, is over the top and I just didn't find the explanations of their existence very convincing. Worst of all, the vampire tribes have the names "Voorhess" and "Leatherfaces". I understand this was supposed to be a clever reference for the horror fans, but it wasn't clever at all. It just sounded dumb and out of place (unlike the much more subtle references in James Gunn's "Slither", such as naming stores after lesser-known horror directors).

That's all I want to say. If you can stand lots of cheese (on this day I couldn't and I'm from Wisconsin) and want to see average actors with poor costumes fight vampires in space (although "space" looks a lot like any other forest on earth) check this one out, if you can find it. I don't personally recommend this when you can watch other cheesy vampires films (Jon Carpenter's "Vampires") or other cheesy space movies. Or maybe even some good ones. But, hey, do your thing.

Okay, Bloodsuckers is not a good or great movie, or at least to me. If anything I found it decent and reasonably entertaining, especially compared to other low-budget movies I've seen recently. Bloodsuckers does actually have some note-worthy performances, Joe Lando, who was the best and only good thing about Meteor Apocalypse, is decent, Michael Ironside while underused does a nice job as the villain and Natassia Malthe, complete with a wardrobe that completely flatters her figure, is incredibly sexy and not too bad acting-wise either. The story is also an improvement, true it is predictable and not exactly original(apart from the interesting angle of vampire mind sex) but unlike most other low-budget movies I've recently seen it's actually engaging too, and I say the same thing about the action scenes and the gore. Where Bloodsuckers does fall down is with the rest of the cast aren't as good, either bland or irritating(Leanne Adachi manages to be both those things), the script is of rather cheesy quality, the human characters are stereotypical and not all of them are easy to identify with and the cheap effects for the vampires(who themselves as a whole lacked charisma and menace mostly). Overall, reasonably entertaining but one with many flaws. 5/10 Bethany Cox

First off; this movie is a bit out there even in direct-to-video terms, but in this case, that isn't such a bad thing! The story revolves around a group of space vampire-hunters that go from planet to planet trying to exterminate the bloodsucker menace. Along the way; the crew must solve the mystery of why the defense systems of the human colonies on various planets are being shut down, allowing the vampires to massacre it's residents. As well as stop the Vampires from starting all out war with humans. Though the idea of the movie is a bit cheesy and there is literally no plot twists; Bloodsuckers has an unexpected charm that lures you in and keeps you watching. The only real problems I had with the movie was the worm-sock puppet and the constant bickering. However, Bloodsuckers made up for that by actually showing reasons why the crew start to trust each other, instead of the main character does something cool and they forget all their past discrepancies (A feet that most movies always do). Also, I enjoyed the idea of many different species of vampires, instead of just one (Yes, even the vampire worm IDEA was creative; not the actual worm itself.) In conclusion, Bloodsuckers is a strange, entertaining film. In my personal opinion, I would like to see Sci-fi channel make a series from this movie. (Hey, it can't be worst than tremors!)