Satan's Playground

I consider myself a fan of Mr. Dante as a writer and director. I enjoyed both desecration and Horror. Did they have good acting? Not really. Were they scary? Desecration had some creepy parts, but overall no. So why did I like these movies? because they were surreal. They were on crack and they knew it. This is what made the movies enjoyable to watch. Satan's playground is much more straight forward and this leaves all of Dante's bad dialogue and bad actors nowhere to hide. The movie isn't scary. There is only one really moment of gore. This movie is just plain bad. The married couple in the film look like father and daughter and I thought they were for the first half hour.

This movie was so goddamn AWFUL that even thinking about it now makes me wince in pain.

• The acting is terrible. So...very terrible...not one of the people in this movie can act...Acting is not one of their talents, they have no acting ability, acting is beyond their limited talents, I know dead fish who had more liberating careers yadda yadda. Trust me.

• The story is really...meh...It's badly written, uninspired and the storyline really is pathetic, disjointed and altogether boring.

• It has the typical stupid plot points, where people do stupid things and you lose all respect for them as characters.

• Can I mention the terrible acting again? - It was painful...seriously...

• I mean...I wish I could find more to complain about but there's so little substance to the film and all the people in it that there's literally nothing left to say about it, apart from, Whatever you do, DO NOT watch this film unless you enjoy the slow and painful melting of your own brain as you sit through the most retarded and pathetic attempt at movie making you will ever witness.

I'm doing this to save people from wasting a good 90 minutes of precious, precious life.

I wanted to give this movie a chance, even after the texas chainsaw massacre like start.

Four characters with baby in car driving through middle of nowhere, with nothing engaging to say.

When they break down & we get to the action it did start promisingly however after the initial victim departs it all goes swiftly downhill & i lost interest fast. The title is a misnomer, you only get to see devil worshippers in one scene & thats your lot, theyre not integral to the storyline at all. The continuity is poor & wardrobe lacking (i thought county cops in tennesee wore brown or green uniforms, surely black is a City cop outfit?) The one saving grace is a great performance by the Mrs Leeds character who holds your attention & the film together.

I could go on but why waste time? Late night film fare, to fall asleep to. Is the Jersey Devil supposed to be invisible??? I think they blew most of the budget on the door knocker !

I just wasted 80 minutes of my life watching this trash. What the hell was that? No one fought back. All they did was scream. I mean there is "unrealistic" horror, sure. But this was "UNREALISTIC" horror. If you can call it that. I heard Dante was a "great" horror director. I guess I was dead wrong. The cover makes it look pretty good and then ...nope. I recommend Evil Dead and Evil Dead 2. Most of the time I just laughed, and not good laughter. Just because it was pathetic. It just goes to show that the cover of the DVD can really be deceiving. I don't think I will ever watch a Dante movie again. Don't waste your time. Not even 1 out of 10.

It seemed like a stereotypical dysfunctional family, presumably Italian-American, on a trip through the woods in New Jersey. They break down and, like the back roads of Texas, they come upon things they should have left alone.

Felissa Rose seemed more like the daughter than the wife, but I'll play along. If Frank (Salvatore Paul Piro) can get a wife like that, there is hope for me.

Major screams from Felissa Rose, putting her at the head of the class as a Scream Queen.

Creepy, bloody, suspenseful fun makes for a good scary pic with some very weird characters.