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Despidiendo mi vida (2003)

Opiniones de usuarios

Despidiendo mi vida

18 opiniones
7/10

Emotionally draining and compelling, all at the same time.

Oh wow. The normal words used to describe movies just don't apply here. In most regards, this defies all conventional logic used in the movies and is by no means, a typical movie. I caught this one at its premier at the Sundance Film Festival and was not very well prepared for what I was about to see.

The Event refers to the assisted suicide of a young man Matt (Don McKellar). Matt has AIDS and has just about run the course of conventional treatments. There are about to be no cocktails left and nothing to look forward to but a long and painful death. Matt has been living with AIDS for seven years now and doesn't want to go out that way. If he's got to go out, he's going out on his own terms: his way and at his time. So he enlists the help of several friends, rounding up as many potent prescription drugs as they can get their hands on. Then a party is thrown to celebrate his departure from earth, and to have one last fling before dying. And then it's time to get it over with and Matt is assisted with his suicide.

Now all of that is all that Nick (Parker Posey) has to work with. She works as a lawyer for the state of New York and has received notice that Matt did not die of natural causes. It's up to her to find out who helped Matt kill himself, and the more she learns about the event, the more it impacts her (as well as the viewer).

And what we are left with is a movie with a cause. This is all about the AIDS epidemic and how it affects everyone, one person at a time. Now I personally haven't known anyone with AIDS, or anyone who was helped in committing suicide, but I found myself emotionally worn out when the credits started rolling. I however, was the exception to the rule, and continually heard one sniffling sound after another (from the rest of the audience) and knew that this was a movie with some emotional kick to it. This is not a feel good movie; this is not a comedy that you can simply walk away from. This one is going to linger in the back (and probably even the front) of your mind for quite some time. It has some exceptionally powerful themes and images, and is a credit to the art of movie directing. Thom Fitzgerald is one of the undiscovered directors of his day, and he proves that you don't need unlimited budget or special effects to make a really powerful movie. He simply shows us life in all its painful glory and doesn't try to sugar coat it for anybody. He takes a growing social problem and makes sure we don't forget just how much it is affecting the world, and he makes it look easy.

Part of the reason he was so successful was because of the talented acting core he had to work with. Don McKellar doesn't usually come to mind when you think of outstanding actors, but he sure delivered a fine performance here. Olympia Dukakis plays Lila, Matt's mother, and if she isn't wonderful to watch, then nobody ever has been. She plays the mother that isn't concerned about the negative aspects of her son or his life, she just loves her kid. She shows the true beauty of motherhood and unconditional love in a way that few women have ever done on film. And finally there is the lovely and erotic Sarah Polley. I don't care what she's in, I just have a hard time taking my eyes off her. She seems to command my attention wherever she is on screen, and she always rewards the attention when it is given.

I had a chance to speak with her after the show was over, and I was really impressed with her. She doesn't seem to be stuck on herself and is a rather humble little thing. As good as she can be, she could have already made a household name for herself, and she hasn't let that get in her way. She sticks to the independent movies because she can make the movies with a purpose. She can do what she enjoys and feel good about it at the end of the day, because she's not in it solely for the money. As an actress, she has the ability to impact the lives of millions and she seems to take that responsibility seriously. She doesn't do the fluff that makes you rich, she only does what she believes in. And speaking of which, just about everyone involved in the movie said the only reason they took it was because they had someone close to them go through the same thing. Olympia Dukakis said that she had been to two such events and was forever changed by them. And that my friends, is the power of independent movies. They aren't made for the money, but to share the ideas contained in them. And this one has some pretty potent ideas. The other thing that really impressed me was how the director handled the situation with 9/11. The movie was filmed shortly thereafter and he included a nice little scene showing how it affected the characters in the movie. It was just a quick little scene, but I was surprised at how much it meant to me and how much I was thinking about it after the movie had already ended.
  • chicothekid
  • 19 ene 2003
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7/10

McKellar's Event

  • anaconda-40658
  • 28 abr 2015
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6/10

Another AIDS dying flick with a twist

Gay guy Matt has died from AIDS and Asst. D.A. Posey suspects something other than natural causes. In spite of these mysterious overtones, "The Event" spends most of it's time being a gay guy dying flick which deals with coming out to mom, visiting doc's, hanging with gay friends, talking about options, taking drug "cocktails", creeping symptoms, emotional contortions, philosophizing about life/death, etc. in a kind of muddled Mulligan stew of gay/straight family/friend relationship stuff via flashback. The ill focused story manages to pull itself together in the end and gives everyone in the audience (who is left) ample time to relish in the hopeful woe of the moment...and then ends all over again. Kinda sappy, full of stereotypes, quite disjointed, and poorly scripted, "The Event" has it's moments though they apparently went unnoticed by GLAAD. The bare bones DVD I watched also had no CC or subtitles or special features. Recommended for gays and anyone who have the stomach for another AIDS flick. (B-)
  • =G=
  • 17 may 2004
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Thom Fitzgerald: take a bow

Thom Fitzgerald has done a wonderful job directing this film. By twenty minutes into the movie I cared about the characters. There's nothing pretentious or annoying about this movie, however the ending shocked me totally. I was not prepared for the ending. I heard sniffles when the credits rolled and when I walked out on to the sidewalk after leaving the theatre I felt stunned. I had no idea that local actor Walter Borden was in the movie -- a definite added attraction. But I don't want to say who does a better job in acting than others as I totally believe the movie is superb just the way it is.

This is a movie I would prefer to attend alone so no one will talk to me throughout the film. Without sounding like an owl, the ending shocked the pants off me. I thought I figured it out, but was w-a-y off. Thom Fitzgerald: take a bow.
  • Barry-44
  • 11 oct 2003
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7/10

A matter of life and death is a daily fact

  • Demuytere
  • 10 nov 2006
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3/10

Uneventful

Addresses some important issues like assisted suicide. Some powerful scenes, but no overly likable characters. Slow moving and dreary. I know it wasn't meant to be carry a cheerful atmosphere, but it was just too bland. Not a film that would appeal to the brainwashed, general population of puppets who make most Hollywood films as popular and high grossing as they are. However, could have brought a little more to the table for the rest of the viewing audience as well. Not bad, but far from great.

4/10
  • doowylloh
  • 2 oct 2003
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10/10

Everything that "Philadelphia" wasn't

I was fortunate enough to see this film at the Sundance Film Festival, and while I was ostensibly in Park City for skiing, this film will stand out in my memory as the high point of the trip. Poignant, heartfelt, authentic, beautifully acted, outstanding direction, incredible script - I could go on...

When the director of the film came out to address the audience before the screening, he commented about all the love that went into this film. This "touchy-feely" stuff tends to make me a bit uneasy, but in fact, every frame of this picture showed that love.

This film is so utterly honest with it's subject - a gay man dying of AIDS, post 9/11 - that you wonder how a film like "Philadelphia" is still regarded in such high esteem. As a gay man, I felt "Philadelphia" was fraudulent - unreal - pure Hollywood sap. (I won't ever forget the scene when Hank's character, covered with KS lesions, is handed a newborn baby to cuddle. Yeah, that'd happen...)

If you want the real thing, check out this amazing, wonderful film - we now just have to pray this masterpiece finds a distributor.

The auditorium I saw this film in at Sundance probably held 1500 people. There wasn't a dry eye in the house.
  • KevNJeff
  • 23 ene 2003
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10/10

why'd they walk out?

i heard of the movie by chance and caught it while it played (it was only here for a week). i had to go by myself because no one else would go with me. but i did, and i'm glad i did. what an amazing movie. it moved me in ways i never believed possible. i went because of don. i knew little of the plot. an old couple left mid-way through the movie. why? it was hard to watch. it was a hard concept to swallow. i cared about the characters from the start. when the sister reacted to her brother's news of his infection it hit me harder than a bus could have. that's the reaction i would have had.

it was a hard topic to deal with, but it was done so properly and it ws very beautiful. the acting, the filming, the writing, it drew emotion out of people.

it really is a must see. i can't wait for it to be released for home-viewing. bravo
  • cole_butt
  • 2 mar 2004
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10/10

This movie made me cry and it takes a lot to make me cry.

The event was a strong powerful movie. The family was cast perfect. It felt like it could of been your neighbors. The movie made me cry and every person sitting next o me cried as well. Olympia should get an award for her acting. The little girls made me laugh. I needed to laugh between my tears. Good Job
  • tammytt
  • 24 jul 2003
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Both the film and the event it portrays qualify as "events."

I came to this film via Thom Fitzgerald's earlier work, the mostly comic pseudo-documentary "Beefcake," so I was unprepared for the many-layered drama of "The Event." There have been a lot of films about gay men with AIDS, most of which are earnest and predictable, but "The Event" is definitely surprising in its story. It is easy to identify with the various points of view in the film, and that raises the viewer's stakes considerably. And what an indie dream of a cast! I viewed this DVD via NETFLIX which inexplicably -- considering their trove of Grade Z films about gay people -- doesn't stock "Beefcake." Thom Fitzgerald doesn't do the same old same old -- for which, hats off and Thanks!
  • Bockharn
  • 24 jul 2004
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9/10

I would of like see this in more movie theatres

When I went to see The Event. I cried. I as a parent realized that this story could be my child my friend or someone close to me. I really wish that they had advertising money to advertise this movie properly. The cast was amazing. The movie kept you entertained the whole time. I would really recommend watching it. I bought the DVD in Block Buster and watched it for a second time and learned things I didn't catch the first time. I am a harsh critic on movies. I would say the footage was a little choppy but on the whole the story was great and bring your tissues to the screen when you watch it. Olympia played a wonderful Jewish Mother with love and compassion. The Movie was suspenseful and it made you think of many different ways the whole thing occurred.
  • tmtalent
  • 25 dic 2006
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Puts a human face on what for many is only a social tragedy

A excellent film. The Event put a human face on what for many is only a social tragedy and statistics they encounter through the media. The director, Thom Fitzgerald, is due substantial credit for, while not opting for dramatic gimmicks and attempting to create a believable story, putting something togehter that neither collapsed into portraiture nor drolled on into docudrama. The cast performed well also in these regards with a luminous Olympia Dukakis bringing the import of the story front and center. A deeply touching film. Secondarily this film serves as a grave warning in particular to 17-24 year old men, a segment where the HIV infection rate has climbed dramatically during the past couple of years. Many such young men consider AIDS to be a managable disease and not a death sentence and forget that the side effects of many cocktails can all too easily include severe headaches, memory loss and dementia leaving infected individuals with a quality of life that is, in director Fitzgerald's words (who spoke after the film showing at the Quad Cinema in the West Village after the early evening showing on Oct 3) `just not there.' So, find out where this film is being played and go see it!
  • jpostell
  • 3 oct 2003
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10/10

A brilliant, powerful film

Congratulations to everyone who worked on this film! It is an immensely powerful movie that left me speechless. I had the opportunity to see this film at the Tampa International Gay and Lesbian Film Festival on Wednesday, October 8. Most of the audience was reduced to tears, as the story played out. Parker Posey and Olympia Dukakis gave stunning performances, and it is a crime that they will be not recognized by any award committees. Thank you to the filmmakers for creating such a cinematic triumph and for treating the subject with sensitivity and understanding. I recommend this movie to anyone who has ever seen a loved one suffer with an illness.
  • DJChorus
  • 8 oct 2003
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10/10

A Mainstream Movie

I just got home from seeing this at the 2003 San Francisco ILGFF. It is an extremely powerful movie by the director of The Hanging Garden and Beefcake. There are some familiar faces like Olympia Dukakis, Parker Posey, and Jane Leeves (Frasier's Daphne Moon). The Event shows many different sides of the issue and does not impose an opinion on you. You will leave the theater discussing the issues and characters with your friends. And that's the mark of a good movie. I don't want to spoil it, just go see it!
  • mtoda
  • 17 jun 2003
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Three Women

This is not the kind of thing that attracts me: simple drama. Straight ahead, grinding humanity.

Why would people invest in watching something like this? For engagement, I suppose.

There's engagement in the story, for sure, if you need it. But there is a higher level of engagement in knowing that these players are pouring out their hearts for us.

Sarah Polley is extraordinary, just extraordinary. Olympia has a grace that matters. Parker is less open than usual until the end.

Coming to the event, the man's sister and mother talk about Shirley McLain's performance in "Tears of Endearment." The whole movie revolves around that line, that notion.

The thing is constructed so that there is a movie within the movie — a movie of the event. Something clever.

Ted's Evaluation -- 2 of 3: Has some interesting elements.
  • tedg
  • 29 nov 2005
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8/10

tears, and then more tears

i saw the premiere of this moving film at the sundance film festival. i found the beginning of the movie a little hard to get into. about halfway through the film as the story began to unfold, i started to really care about the characters. by the end of the movie, i didn't think i was going to be able to control the sobs that were welling up in my throat. thom fitzgerald did an amazing job keeping the story interesting as well as informative. it was a real look at the effects AIDS has on the victim, as well as everyone around him. the shocking scene in the film that completes the story is almost unbearable to watch. i have never been more emotionally affected by a movie. and i was extremely thankful to thom fitzgerald for having a good sense of humor and for not crying, like many directors at the festival had done when speaking about their movies. the audience was in shock and it was almost certain that there was not a dry eye in the theater. i also want to comment on the woman in the crowd who gave an emotional thanks to thom for creating this movie because she had recently lost a best friend to AIDS. it was so moving. i'm still touched by this movie-going experience.
  • taracienna
  • 30 ene 2003
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Over long, dreary HIV movie

Only one thing saves The Event from being a total loss; Olympia Dukakis! When she is on screen, the warmth of her being and the grace of her acting temporarily convince you that this is a good movie. She plays a pivotal character and she packs an arsenal of subtle and powerful emotion!

Unfortunately, there are many, many minutes of film dealing with the other characters, most of whom have a faceless, gray presence that gets annoyingly boring. They are not helped by an episodic, way too long screenplay and episodic and short-on-creativity directing. The climax of the film is genuinely moving (thanks mostly to Dukakis), but it takes so long to get there that you feel cheated that you didn't care more for these characters during the balance of the film. The little coda after the climax is unconvincing and unsatisfying.

Lots of unnecessary pop songs intrude along the way. Parker Posey is the only other actress to induce any sparks. If you can wade through the slow spots, its worth seeing for Dukakis; but barely.
  • philip-1
  • 16 jul 2004
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Movie of the week

The hardest thing about doing dramas about subject matters that have already been "Hollywood-ized" is making the audience connect in some special way with the characters - or something new to say. This is usually done through great dialogue and masterful acting. This movie had neither. As an avid movie goer, I hold certain performances as guidelines for judging another. And by far Tom Hank's performance in Philadelphia gripped me and forced emotion from me at all the right places. This film was dead (other than a good job by Olivia as his mother). Parker Posey was devoid of all emotion and the rest of the cast just read their lines like it was a first reading. The plot is also a little on the "yeah right" side - a cop trying to arrest friends of suicide victims. This film teetered on the edge of being a great AIDS story or a cop drama and ultimately failed. Definitely a movie of the week and not worth hard earned cash.
  • peterhoffman
  • 6 feb 2003
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