Garage Days

Unfortunately, the rest of the movie sucks on ice.

The "characters" are either overblown clichés (death-obsessed goth girl? Check. Drugged-out drummer with mod haircut? Check check. Ubiquitous use of eyeliner? Check check check!) or ridiculously annoying people who you'd never spend six seconds with in real life.

Script-wise, this is a soggy mess. There are three people credited with the story, which makes sense as there are at least three movies stitched together. My guess is that Dave Warner wrote a comedy, Alex Proyas penned a tragedy, and Michael Udesky scribbled in a notebook while tripping on liquid acid. Then each of them tore out every fourth page of his script, threw the remaining pages up in the air, and stapled the resulting mess together.

The, um, cinematography is aggravating. Tarantino is not hip, MTV is not edgy and that disjointed text-on-screen technique went out of vogue around the 1890's. As for the trip/rave/ingestion scenes, they're as effective as PSAs: Don't do drugs! Why? They're boring as all get-out.

Overall this is a sickeningly inauthentic movie. The acting is laughable, the comedy is unfunny, the pathos makes you hate these people even more than you previously did. All the tattoos look like they were drawn on with Magic Marker. And the band's total playing time is less than two minutes. 90 seconds of that is a fantasy scene.

The ONLY reason to acknowledge the existence of this celluloid horror is its soundtrack. Featuring the Jam, the Femmes, the Cure, Roxy Music and Tom Jones - that's entertainment. Just buy the record and skip this movie entirely.

Do yourself a favour and see "The Wannabees" (about a gang of foul-mouthed thugs who become the country's most successful children's show), "Razzle Dazzle" (about a failing dance instructor and a bunch of fellow losers trying to coach a bunch of pre-teen girls to victory) and "Garage Days" about... as best as I can summarize... a rock'n'roll soap opera that plays out like a Hunter S. Thompson nightmare (Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas).

"Garage Days" is exactly what a quirky, offbeat, rock'n'roll Aussie comedy should be: quirky, offbeat & full of rock'n'roll. Before I even get to my review, I'll mention some of the tunes on the soundtrack: AC/DC "It's a Long Way to the Top" & "High Voltage", The Cure "Boys Don't Cry", Violent Femmes "Blister in the Sun", Roxy Music "Love Is the Drug", and a particularly hilarious choreographed psychedelic scene set to Rick James "Superfreak". As in Proyas's masterpiece "The Crow", the music really sets the stage for the whole experience.

"Garage Days" follows a month in the life of a struggling punk-metal-grunge-pop band trying to get their one big shot. Along the way we get roped into the common themes of sex, drugs, love & friendship... and the not-so-common themes of creepy goth girlfriends, soul-sucking slot machines and talking cantaloupes. The whole movie comes at you hard & fast, like "Amelie" on crack.

Quite surprising for director Alex Proyas, master of the cinematic shadows ("The Crow", "Dark City")--it's very bright and lively. If you're a fan of Proyas, you must see this side of him. Much like Tim Buton who did "Batman" as well as "Peewee's Big Adventure", Proyas proves that there's a fine line between darkness & light, and he's able to cross it seamlessly.

A note for us Yanks, it helps to watch it with the subtitles because the Aussie accent can run over you like a rabid kangaroo. And some of the quips are priceless, you don't want to miss a beat. I found the script to be hilarious, the acting charming, the story suspenseful and the presentation memorable.

Tastes may vary, but I found each character to be instantly likable, from "Freddie" (an odd mix of Peewee Herman and a young Christopher Walken) to "Tanya" (a punk rich girl who sports the perfect blend of hot, cute & badass), "Lucy" (Henry Rollins meets Billy Idol meets Mongo from Blazing Saddles), "Joe" (a puzzler who is best left for you to decipher), "Joe's dad" (an aging rocker who himself is more childish & clueless than his son), all the peripheral characters who did a stellar job, and then there's the guy who steals the show "Bruno" their loser manager (played by Russell Dykstra from the aforementioned "Wannabees").

There aren't many well-known movies I can compare this to because it's so unusual, but if you've seen the hilarious Japanese flicks "Kamikaze Girls", "Swing Girls" or "Otakus in Love" I'd say this fits right alongside them. It also reminded me a bit of the funny Rainn Wilson flick "The Rocker", only pumped up with twice the adrenaline and totally Aussified. If you like rock'n'roll comedies, do not miss this!

I don't need to say that i only rented the movie because i saw Alex Proyas name on it. Ofcourse i had read some reviews and seen some pretty slick pics on the net, so i knew what i was getting into. Although i was quite sure that it was a hot potato i expected some style from Proyas, some darkness despite the original premise. What i got wasn't from what i expected, style-wise. Quality-wise though...

The movie started off, more or less like "Snatch" or "Lock Stock..." choose your preference, anyways, quick cuts, some rather silly jokes, freeze frames et la. I though of just stopping the flick and go see a real movie on the nearby theatre. But naw, i just could not, i 've never done that, so why now? I MEAN it didn't suck THAT MUCH. This had all the trademarks of an Alex Proyas movie, i mean it ain't no "Planet of the Apes"(in this one you can tell who directed it), the rock music is here, as a matter of fact The CURE are here as well, the stylish dark kind of MTV shots are here, slow motion clear and present, a pinch darkness? Here as well. But despite having all these elements, i just couldn't stop wondering, what attracted Proyas to the project, it's fairly average if not total garbage of a script. Although not cliched, it has its fair share of wickedness, some funny moments, some chilling moments and some slapstick, but overall it is a mess. What it needed was wit but It lacked wit, it could have worked if there were some Woody Allen or Kevin Smith one-liners--their movies lack srtucture too anyway!--. The music now: as i said it's quite cool, not The Crow kind of cool but still it was a pretty nice little collection of songs, these were used nicely through out the movie, sometimes effectively, most of the times just to provoke feelings that the actors are unable to communicate.

What made the movie worthwhile though, was the fact that it had a few set-pieces which were cool, like a certain bloody bath tub or that slow-mo(bullet time you say?) rain, which looked obviously phony but still that is what makes them attractive. Acting is fairly average, Haley Joel Osment could act the feminine parts better than these gals...not to mention the guys parts the governor of California could kick some serious acting but here! The cinematography is moody at times, there are some new hotties coming out of this flick(no not that leading lady! But surely the other two ladies are certainly going to Hollywood...although they shouldn't really act..if you know what i mean)but other than that... A Final notice i hope I, ROBOT is a return to form, cause this gives Alex a bad name. I mean man! Get a hold of yourself! You've seen it before, it's tv-movie quality, it wanted to be ALMOST FAMOUS--but it's just shite.

4/10 Choose life, Choose another movie...

Being engaged to an Aussie may jade my opinion of this movie, since I have been exposed to some of the little inside jokes and such over the past few years. However, any movie that keeps you talking about it and wanting your friends to see it so that you can chat about your favorite scenes is a movie worth watching.

Yes, it is an old plot, but aren't they ALL?!?! Boy meets girl...boy can't have girl (Groundhog Day fell into this one in one aspect). The underdog(s) fighting all hope to live the dream (a la 8 Mile). We've learned to accept that there are a few plots that work, yet it is the nuances that happen to make them unique. This little movie has some great nuances, so forget the similarities and enjoy the uniquities. Grab a bag of chips and enjoy the ride.

By the way, without spoiling anything, anyone out there who loved seeing the Stanford Tree mascot and the Cal Bear mascot throwing punches during a basketball game will howl out loud at one small scene. I know that I did.

This film taught me an important lesson. Don't choose a movie based on the past works of the people who made it (which works both ways, actually).

I was expecting a film directed by Alex Proyas to be at least half-decent, but was unpleasantly surprised.

This film has a storyline so lame it's funny, mediocre dialogue, truly appalling acting (with one or two exceptions) and superfluous special effects. Don't waste your time with it. I watched it with my girlfriend and we were ready to switch it off after 10 minutes. We gave it another 10 minutes to see if it improved - nope. Back to the Loch with you, Nessie!