Hansel e Gretel

The story is familiar with the fairytale, as both brother and sister are also named Hansel and Gretel. Instead of getting lost in woods and finding a gingerbread house, they're both fascinated by a car, and two men kidnap them and take them to a heavily secured building. Inside is a clinic full of scientists who work in illegal experiments. The poor kids are chosen as organ donors and they die in the process. Their ghosts return from the grave seeking revenge on all those involved. What happens are some gruesome scenes, as the kids behave like monsters. I found the tune being hummed by the kids throughout the film mostly annoying. I expected more to this film but the story became predictable.

This film, which is identical with "Hansel & Gretel" (which is listed in the IMDb as a different movie), is one of five films Lucio Fulci "presented" and "supervised" towards the end of the 1980s (the others are "Non Avere Paura Della Zia Marta" aka "The Murder Secret", "Snake House" aka "Bloody Psycho", "Massacro" and "Fuga Dalla Morte" aka "Luna di Sangue"). From these four films, Fulci later used most of the gore effects again in his "Un Gatto nel Cervello" aka "Nightmare Concert".

The idea is a good one: Two children get abducted by villains who take their organs to sell it illegally for transplantation. The ghosts of the kids return and take revenge, forcing the bad folks to suffer more or less nasty deadly accidents. The problem is that Giovanni Simonelli brought too much insignificant dialogue into this film, so it early loses most of its pace and goes on rather slowly. The budget obviously was quite low, therefore, even though the villains suffer mostly ghastly demises, only few of them are really gory (especially an accident involving the victim's eye, which is the only scene Fulci used again for "Nightmare Concert").

Although the film isn't really good, it's still quite interesting and entertaining, mainly because of the good idea. I just don't understand why this film never was released even in Italy (the same fate suffered "Fuga Dalla Morte", while "Snake House" got a release in Italy and Germany, "Massacro" at least in Germany, and "The Murder Secret" in France), because compared to many other (mostly direct-to-video) low budget horror, "Non Si Seviziano i Bambini" is an okay film.

"Hansel and Gretel" was inspired by an old fairy tale written by the Brothers Grimm – it tells of a brother and sister who go out in the forest. On their way they find a candy house. The house is inhabited by a kindly old lady, but in truth she's a witch, and what she has in store for them....

"Hansel e Gretel" (Never Hurt Children) by Giovanni Simonelli – Italy 1990, is, what we could call, a modernization of the fairy tale - Hansel and Gretel are going home through the forest, and on their way they are kidnapped by a gang that sells body organs to the rich in need of a transplant.

The children are taken to a clandestine clinic, and there they die after the operation. Hans and Gretel are buried in a shallow grave, but they will come back from the dead and take grisly revenge on all those who took direct or indirect part in their murder.

The story is good but it's not well developed. The film is a mixture of slasher and horror film, with rights to sentimentality, "moral indignation" (!) and tastelessness. The ghosts of Hansel and Gretel will kill and kill and kill, and they also have supernatural powers to boot. The killing scenes follow each other closely, and some of them will satisfy the gorehounds.

"Hansel e Gretel" (Never Hurt Children) lacks tension, but those that have a sense of humor will have their fun, and in its own way the film is entertaining.

Hansel e Gretel (1990)

* (out of 4)

The plot has very little to zero to do with the fairy tale. The story is pretty simple as a couple kids are taking a shortcut when they are kidnapped by a gang of thugs who sell children to a doctor who takes their organs. After the children are murdered their ghosts come back to seek revenge.

That seems like a cool little movie, doesn't it? Sadly, the end result is rather bad and it's really too bad because this could have made for a good movie but it's just another example of the Italian horror market having no budget and not much going for it. Lucio Fulci "presented" this movie as well as four others. I think it's pretty clear that they didn't have too much here so they wanted to use Fulci's name to try and bring people to the film. I'm sure this worked but that doesn't make the movie any better.

Most people will only know this film from one sequence where an eyeball is severely damaged. This scene would make an appearance in Fulci's A CAT IN THE BRAIN. The death scenes are what most people come to these movies for but the budget here was so small that they really couldn't do much. In fact, the majority of the death scenes are incredibly lame including one woman who simply falls into a pool and drowns within seconds. Another woman slips in a bathtub and there's one guy who gets sucked into the ground. Whenever gore is involved it seems like pieces of steak are used as flesh.

The biggest problem here is that there's just no budget to do special effects so we're given a lot of silly dialogue scenes. This thing clocks in at 87 minutes, which is about twenty too long. The cast are mostly forgettable, although Paul Muller appears briefly but even he can't save this turkey.

There's no mistaking Fulci's guiding hand in Giovanni Simonelli's Hansel e Gretel, especially with a ludicrous story involving malevolent children (as per Fulci's Sweet House of Horrors) and some classic Fulci-style eyeball trauma (one of the film's victims has her head shoved onto a spike, the point pushing her eyeball out of the socket). Sadly, the rest of the deaths - of which there are plenty - aren't all that gory or imaginative, making this a rather tedious affair overall.

The film definitely had potential to be a genuinely grim (or should that be Grimm?) shocker, with a plot that involves the harvesting of organs from kidnapped children, but Simonelli doesn't fully fully explore this extremely dark subject, spending most of his time on the silly supernatural revenge antics of the titular moppets, the latest children to fall foul of the organ traffickers.

Those who conspired to abduct and kill the kids are confronted by Hansel and Gretel's spirits and despatched in a variety of ways: the siblings' stepfather, who happily sold the kids, is chewed up by some farm machinery (an effect achieved using what looks like a side of beef); a woman falls in a pool and drowns; a man is crushed by a wine barrel; another bloke drowns in slurry; a guy shoots himself in the face; two idiots fall into some waterworks. Simonelli's spectacularly uninspired direction renders these deaths laughable, with the two ghostly glowing-eyed children not in the least bit menacing. The repetitious nursery rhyme that precedes each slaying really gets on the nerves.

Investigating the murders is rookie cop Silvia (Elisabete Pimenta Boaretto) who is unable to convince her superiors that the deaths are supernatural in nature. Fred, the husband of the organ traffickers' ringleader, looks like the most likely suspect - he decides to flee the scene in the film's not-at-all-exciting climax, taking Silvia as his hostage. The spooky sprogs put paid to his plans, and, having claimed their last victim, are finally able to rest in peace.

4/10 for the juicy eyeball scene (which Fulci would borrow for his own movie A Cat In The Brain AKA Nightmare Concert), and a spot of gratuitous female nudity (a bath scene, a sex scene, and Silvia slipping into her nightclothes).