The Mind of the Married Man

With this show I've learned a valuable lesson: Trust any program HBO sees fit to put on. I quickly dismissed Larry Sanders, Sex and the City, and Mr Show. I was not interested in Mind of the Married Man for it's first couple of episodes believing it to be nothing more than the male Sex and the City. A negative review in People didn't help its case either.

Because it was sandwiched in between Band of Brothers and Curb Your Enthusiasm for its first few weeks I was forced to catch little bits and pieces here and there. Eventually it started to catch my attention and before I knew it I eagerly awaited each episode.

Like all HBO shows it earns points for doing things that broadcast programming can't get away. Subjects, namely sex, are dealt with bluntly and openly without trying to delicately skirt the issue. How many shows can you name where you'd see a woman bobbing her head up and down in her husband's lap while he snickers at the Three Stooges on TV? I don't think you'll see a subplot about a guy contemplating whether or not to get a "happy ending", a euphemism for a handjob, from a masseuse on Must See TV either.

The continuing story across the entire season is very well executed. The developing sexual tension between Mickey and Missy his assistant and how it affects his relationship with his wife kept me hooked. The final episode of the season had what I considered to be one of the best comic payoffs in which it is revealed that Mickey's Japanese masseuse isn't as she appears to be. I suspect that the framework for the entire season of episodes was worked out far in advance. It's not as though week to week an effort is made to fudge the storyline together.

The comedy, like other elements in the show, is played subtly at least as compared to that of most sit-coms where you can almost hear the actors and writers cry out, "Laugh! Laugh! Damn you!" Married Man doesn't really care whether you get everything and if you do it's not going to wait until you finish laughing before moving on to the next thing.

The characters like people in real life don't always have the right thing to say at the right time. You can almost see, in Mike Binder's portrayal, Mickey searching for his words when placed in tense situations.

Ivana Milicevic, who plays Missy, came as a complete surprise. Because she looks as though she must have had a career as a runway model I assumed that she was a.)not intelligent b.)not a good actress. As conventionally beautiful as she is the show doesn't merely see fit to use her as set dressing. Missy is afforded a fair amount of depth. Of course there is hardly an ugly woman in the cast and yet the aim of the show is not to merely parade an attractive cast for a drooling audience.

If there is a criticism I could level at the show it is in regards to the show's setting and occupation of the characters. Almost all romantic comedies take place in some large metropolitan area usually New York, Chicago, or San Francisco. Married Man is set in Chicago. These urban environments aren't presented as most of us would see them as fairly dirty, crowded, and stress filled places. Confrontational strangers are only there to provide some comedy. Main characters never have jobs most middle Americans would have, instead plying their trade in some form of the media/publishing business. Mickey works for a newspaper. However given the quality of the show this is relatively easy to overlook.

I was reluctant to watch this show at first, fearing it would be overly manly and leaking with testosterone(yes I am a guy) as a sort of opposite to Sex in the City or maybe even a retaliation to such a program. To my pleasant surprise, though, the show packs plenty of humor, smart writing, and top notch acting. I had never been one to watch HBO original series, feeling they were out of place on a channel now inappropriately named Home Box Office that was originally meant to air uncut movies. This show turned me around though, and I look forward to when it comes on.

The main character, Micky(played by Mike Binder) is a man that I think most of us guys can identify with somehow, whether it be through his constant questioning of his own commitment to his beloved wife or, for a change of pace, not his trouble understanding woman, but in understanding himself as a man. Claims that the show is unrealistic are only true in that a lot of us may not take the chances that Micky takes and that his two friends seem to be very much playing his Id and Super Ego almost too perfectly. The lack of realism in those ways, though, is a blessed thing, for if they wasn't there, the viewer would not be able to truly understand the importance of fidelity, of love, and sacrifice which make up the theme of the series. I mean, if the show were completely realistic, then we may as well stick to our own mystifying experience and enjoy our lack of answers. The show is designed just so that it retains those necessary pieces of realism, but also takes the viewer out of reality for the purposes of showing where men make their mistakes, when they do something right, and when, most importantly, they think they are doing something wrong which is completely natural and forgivable.

Mike Binder, also the creator and director of the show, gives us a chance to truly peer into Mickey's mind and allows us to witness what may happen if we did, in fact, happen to take that invitation into an attractive strangers apartment. He shows us what his fantasies are, where his guilt comes from, and how much he truly does love his wife and strives to be the perfect husband, as well as father. Overall, the show has a message that is both positive and heart warming. It gives hope to the worrisome man, and insight to the confused wife. The acting is superb, as well as the writing. I would go into more detail, but I'm spent. Give it a chance. I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

I simply cannot understand some of the criticisms of this show, specifically that the characters are unrealistic. I see these character types all the time, from the cheating alpha male (Jake) to the loyal but whipped Doug. Binder's own character is stuck in the middle like most of us, he wants to please his wife without defering to her on every issue. The constant struggles between love and boredom, power and submission, and monogomy and straying is played out in depth every week. The writing is witty, intelligent and focused, it often takes the unexpected turn. Hopefully it can maintain its quality.

This is a great show. I love it, and I know that in time this will be seen as one of the top comedies on HBO. I find it so funny. It's on Signature now in reruns and coming back this summer and I for one can't wait. Mike Binder and Sonya Walger give such a realistic look at the imperfection of marriage. I am a big fan of his and wrote a review here of his HBO movie and I feel that I should weigh in on his show as well. He's getting the guy side of marriage an airing and I know that upsets a lot of people but my wife and I think it's funny and healthy for this side to be shown. ( I sit through Sex in the CIty with her, it's only fair) Watch the show. It's brilliant.

This is the best show I've seen on t.v. in a long time. I just don't understand the negativity that i've seen in reviews (NY Post reviewer had already made up her mind by reading the script)and by comments on message boards. I'm a 32 year old professional and the conversations these characters have ring true. The only reason I can come up with that people don't like this show, is 1) they are threatened women, 2) they are threatened women masquerading as men, 3) think that "Friends" is a real hoot, 'nuff said on that one. If HBO doesn't renew this show for another season, then what? Oooohhhh, I can't wait for another showing of Short Circuit 2, or please anything with Steve Gutenberg! Come on people, the reason that entertainment is in such a sorry state is that people just hate to think and be entertained at the same time. I can't believe I wasted time writing this, but wanted to balance the negative reviews. Mind of the Married Man rocks! If you like Woody Allen, Animal House, Caddyshack, Dean Martin Roasts, Golf, NFL, NHL, and HATE Barbra Streisand, Oprah Winfrey, Steve Kmetko, Alec Baldwin (any Baldwin for that matter), Men's Health Mag, Al Gore, and Hillary, then give it a try.