Baby Ghost

Instead of watching this movie just put a trash can on your head and bang on it with a kitchen spoon, it will give you the same experience.

BABY GHOST is the two-star movie par excellence. There actually is some kind of plot, images are in focus, there is some intention behind the camera angles and editing -- which is to say, there is a movie here. After that, we get into just how dismal the acting is, how irritatingly cheap the musical score is, how poorly done the overall result is. The intention is clearly the children's video market, so quality of character and script wasn't pursued. It might as well have been filmed over a weekend in a single building without a crew, and possibly was.

Students of low-budget film should probably be required to have a copy of this, as reference to what their work could end up being -- and use it as template to understand why they might make different choices: understanding production values etc. Because effort was made in creating this, but not effort that paid off very well.

This movie can only be viewed on Rifftrax and it is still terrible. I wonder how much Joe Estavez paid for this train wreck? All I know is the check must have cleared.

This film is brought to us by the same director who brought us Hell Comes to Frogtown! He also brought us Rollergator and this one is more like the latter rather than the former. Though I was no fan of Hell Comes to Frogtown, it looks like a movie. Both this one and Rollergator resemble home movies where people are just goofing around, mainly Joe Estevez in both instances. He is not a good actor by any means, but these two films seem that they should be below even his standards. Hell, I think John Carradine would have turned this crap down, "What? The movie is not on film? Forget it, I won't star in this dreck!"

So, the plot in this one has a photographer trying to get a kid to smile while his mother does not attempt to help. How hard is it to make your kid smile? The kid is like ten, at that age you don't need coaxing by the photographer, just a cue. So we witness this and a long phone conversation before we get baby ghost who likes to lock people in an office building while giggling, turns out it is the ghost of a baby put to death for mischief and tomfoolery back in the 1600's. Man, putting babies to death, that was a rough time!

As with Rollergator, this film has only Joe Estevez as a star. Granted, the maintenance man was apparently in Plan Nine From Outer Space, so yeah, Joe is the primary star. We also get strange as hell looking security guard, fortune teller dressed as Stevie Nicks and two robbers that seem to serve no purpose other than to extend this film's already long feeling run time!

This film was bad, I will say it is better than Rollergator, but that is not saying much. Joe's existence in film's such as this I have theorized is just to make one stop flipping the channels and as themselves if that is Martin Sheen and the fact that the director thought that both this and Rollergator would get sequels green lit, really makes me think he is a very optimistic person, and quite possibly delusional and insane...