Kim Comes Home...

Its title is most of the plot, as Rene Bond portrays an art student named Kim, coming home to room with her childhood pal Barbara, who has become a hooker. Complications, of the sexual variety, ensue.

Very poorly made, this film purports to present student life, but obviously on another planet. Barbara's boyfriend Bill is a psychology student (played by Ric Lutze, who in real-life is Rene Bond's familiar paramour) who goes with her after a "Freudian lecture" to harangue his roommate Gary into having sex with Kim, while all Gary wants to do is cram for an exam. Given that this is hardcore porn, he relents.

This film falls into the lowest percentile of porn, where you can actually hear the director screaming directions at the cast (at one point "Lean back!" loudly exceeds the volume of the cast's moaning & groaning as well as the nonstop Muzak track). Tech credits are miserable and the only "style" is a pan over to a mirror on which "The End" is scrawled. The improvised dialog includes Barbara giving, in her monotone drone, the heard-it-1000-times-before lecture to Kim on how everyone is a whore, only she gets paid for it. Yeah, right. I get the feeling low-rent pornographers actually believe that crap.

Pop music pirated, in drowsy elevator cover versions, includes such hits as "Windmills of Your Mind," Francis Lai's ubiquitous theme from "Love Story," "Goin' Out of My Head," "Clair de Lune," "What a Wonderful World," "The Sounds of Silence" and -played twice: the Beatles' "Hey Jude". Why not play it twice -it's free! Nino Rota's "The Godfather" theme under the opening credits is heard because the DVD-R of this film from Something Weird's Dragon Art Theatre series Vol. 10 mistakenly and very confusingly displays the credits from a porno/mafia spoof BLUE HEAT (1978), a movie they issued on Vol. 116. I call that getting off to an appropriately bad start.

Kim Comes Home (1973)

** 1/2 (out of 4)

Rene Bond plays a college girl who goes to her friend's house and learns that the friend is making extra cash as a prostitute. After pleasuring herself to the love making sounds, Bond decides to try her own talents.

KIM COMES HOME certainly isn't the most creative porn movie ever made but I think fans of the actress will enjoy it for what it is. And what is that? A very cheaply made film that was probably shot in a day but it features the ultra-cute and adorable Bond. Fans of her should enjoy checking this out and especially thanks to a certain scene.

And what scene might that be? It happens towards the end when Bond and a guy are messing around while another woman watches. The woman eventually joins in and this scene certainly steals the picture as both the ladies seem to be really into it and it comes across quite real and erotic.

As far as the rest of the film goes, as I said it was obviously produced for nearly nothing and there's certainly nothing ground-breaking about any of it. There is a version of The Sound of Silence played during one scene, which is rather funny.