El regreso de la momia

A colleague of mine got this for free with his DVD player. Even at that price, this movie represents a shockingly bad deal.

It features tremendous acting skills - especially on the part of the female professor character, who seems to believe acting involves twitching your eyebrows in a deranged manner and nothing more.

It also boasts outstanding sets. Actually it has just the one set, which I suspect is the producer's house, but is supposed to be a university. The room in which they put the mummy on display has a fireplace and a sofa in it, for crap's sake! I won't even go into the lacklustre special effects, because awful as they may be, they outshine every other aspect of the production.

I cannot believe that this excrescence has lost its place in the Bottom 100. Get voting "1", people!

This is a genuinely pitiful film that cannot hide behind the excuse of having no budget, I have seen student films that outclass this one and some of those were made in an afternoon.

There's this jock who is inexplicably on an archeology course. Where's he studying? Well judging by the sets he is at the prestigious university of the directors kitchen. The entire movie is filmed in some guys house and lecture halls are artfully represented by the living room. I expect the dean's office is in the crapper.

Anyway nothing much happens except an ungodly amount of trekking from one room to another. The monster is unleashed for ridiculous reasons and there's an Aztec priest who must surely win the prize for worst casting ever.

In fact the entire cast are awful, not one of them would be considered convincing enough to use on an advert so how they actually got onto a DVD that sits on my shelf I honestly don't know. Some of them say their lines and then look directly at the camera because that's where the guy holding the cue cards is stood.

It really is a pitiful effort. One of the worst films I've ever seen and just so totally pointless in every way. It's also pretty obvious they don't know who Bram Stoker is.

Oh dear, what were they thinking when they wrote this - about something else is my guess, the shopping, what they had for breakfast that morning - pretty much anything except "lets make a good movie".

The acting is atrocious, with stilted dialogue, especially by the guy who plays Morris, you can see him listening for his cues.

The budget was obviously spent entirely on the creature itself but don't let it fool you into thinking this is worth watching - the creature looks like some shambling fat man who has been hit by the ugly stick a few times. The creature fails to be scary as it rarely gets above the pace of an athritic snail.

As I said the creature was where the majority of the budget went, it did not seem to stretch to location or extras. This film is meant to be set upon a school campus and I think you see a total of 9 people, including the creature throughout. Also the "Dorms" look distinctly like a normal house, probably the directors. I even began to suspect that the constant cliche of walking around darkened rooms was probably an effort to save on the lighting bills.

There is no character build up - so little in fact that I can only remember the Morris guys name (because he was so awful) and I have only just watched the damn movie. You do not care about a single one of them.

On my box the film is called "Bram Stoker's The Mummy 2". What the hell as this film got to do with Bram Stoker?

Do not ever ever ever ever ever watch this movie - do not be fooled into thinking "oh, it may be so bad it's funny" - it isn't it's just plain bad.

Really lame horror flick. No gore or nudity,(R rating must be for the teenage profanity), bad acting, dumb dialog. You know you are talking low budget when the dead characters wounds are just a splash of fake blood here and there. I would give this one minus 4 stars.In other words people should be paid to watch this.

I'm normally a fan of the cheap and cheesy drive-in genre, but after seeing this flick, I would seriously consider finding the print, setting it on fire, burying the ashes, digging them up a week later, and burning them again. This is now the most recent addition to my list of the Ten Worst Movies Of All Time.