Ying zi jun tuan

Imagine a movie that took the worst clichés of 70's gangster movies, 70's kung fu movies, 70's porn, 70's cop movies, and Power Rangers, and rolled all into one absurd mess that looked as though it had been scripted by a kindergartener. This movie was easily ten times worse than that. That being said, this is every reason to see it. From the opening scene on, I don't think I stopped laughing once. Nothing made any sense, there was not a transition to be found in the movie, and the number of rape scenes per girl (5 rape scenes, only two females in the entire movie) was quite staggering. I pulled "The Super Ninja" off the rental shelf expecting to watch a hilariously bad movie, but nothing prepared me for the jaw-droppingly awful spectacle that was the Super Ninja. It was amazing.

In the same category as "The Ninja Protector" and "Mafia vs. Ninja" this non-stop action movie is a real treat. That is if you like this kind of movies: lots of bad dubbing, unbelievable flying action, terrible acting and funny ninja violence. Most of the cast from "Mafia vs. Ninja" rejoins in this hilarious movie that is a true MUST for any movie maniac!

Brace yourself, for this is undoubtedly one of the very best and most entertaining ninja-fests ever made!

This movie has it all - dubbing that seems to be perpetually about 2 seconds out of sync with the characters flapping mouths, one of, if not THE most un-erotic lovemaking scene ever committed to celluloid, a ninja surfing on a piece of bamboo(!!!) a soundtrack that liberally borrows i.e steals snippets from other movie scores such as Psycho and Star Wars and some really nifty martial arts action to boot!

Simply put, if you're at all into ninja movies or for that matter B-Movies in general, then you really NEED to see this - it's a veritable classic!

I'm a zen master, and there is various practises we employ in order to clear the mind of the everyday babble that all humans endure. One is to ask yourself "What is the sound of one ninja crapping?" and "If a ninja teleports in a forrest and no one is there to see it, does anyone give a crap?" Joseph Lai, Tomas Tang and Godfrey Ho were the undoubted masters at bringing this zen train of though to life, and here is a fine example.

When I say fine, you know what I mean. It's a mid-eighties ninja film (but NOT a cut and paste film), and it's pure, unfiltered, garbage. Therefore it's great! Set initially in New York (Hong Kong with the Stars and Stripes sellotaped to various walls!), we find ourselves meeting two cops, the Chinese John and the Af-Am Spencer, being chewed out by their boss for arresting the senator's son for attempted rape – turns out the chief would have been happier if they'd let him just get on with it. This has nothing to do with anything but the fight is pretty funny.

The plot itself involves John being framed for possessing drugs, escaping jail, and then trying to find out why anyone framed him in the first place. Obviously it's something to do with the drug trade but what you need to know is that there's five 'elemental ninjas' who have amazing powers (water, earth, air, fire, kebabs) that are rendered unamazing by the zero budget of the film. Watching a ninja surfing on a thin piece of bamboo or burrowing underneath sand is soothing to the soul.

So John's got to go up against these dudes while having flashbacks to his own ninja training, which includes a direct rip from the start of Enter the ninja. There's a few twists and turns but no one in their right mind would care about them. These films are all about the brain damaged action and the laughs! And speaking of brain damaging, there's this brilliant bit of editing where John slumps his head over just right when the film cuts to a scene where a door is kicked open, making it look like John smashed his head on a table.

Even better is the overlong sex scene (that John manages to have while the cops are looking for him) not only does this go on forever and THEN reveal that John hadn't yet taken his trousers off, but then the sexy music switches to some bizarre off kilter tune while the actress starts vibrating her arse all over the place. Genius.

There are many, many battles in this one, there's stolen musical cues (like Psycho), and the usual bad dubbing. No one makes films as stupid as this anymore.

The Super Ninja is a great ninjafest which is very similar to The Mafia Vs Ninja, but The Super Ninja is much better. First of all, it has much more ninjas, and colourful ones. Second, Its plot is much more interesting. Third, it's cheesier than The Mafia Vs Ninja. Fourth, The fights are much better and the climax is very exciting!

The story is about John, an Asian cop who works in America with his black partner called Spenser. One day, John was caught by his fellow cops for possessing drugs that had been put in his apartment in order to set him up. However, John doesn't give up! Therefore, He has to fight against his fellow cops, drugs dealers and the five element ninjas!

I would like to add to this review some technical details such as dubbing, fights, nudity and cheese. Let's start with the dubbing, shall we? Well, its dubbing is very amusing, it's hardly synchronized and the characters have voices that hardly suit them. The fights are very entertaining and sometimes even stunning, the ninjas have great techniques, however, John fights more elegantly. About the nudity, well, there is one or two softcore scenes which add the film another aspect which manages to entertain as well. The cheese! I can certainly say that The Super Ninja has some of the cheesiest killings that I have ever seen, I am not sure if those killing have been filmed intentionally cheesy or not, one thing for sure, there is a fair share of cheese on the top of this pizza!!!

Bottom line, I recommend that every fan of ninja movies check this cheesy ninjafest because it sure has made me have some good laughs! 9/10