Icebreaker

I'm glad this was the only thing on when I was attempting to avoid being responsible...I couldn't stomach much more than five minutes of it (so I got back to work...boo hoo...) though I left it playing just to remind myself of what a real piece of cinematic trash looks like.

I'd like to know who financed this since I could use a loan for a real movie ha! ha! The acting stinks. The plot is retarded and I mean just what is the point? I like Bruce Campbell and Sean Astin and know both of them have done some cheesy work, but I would have to be paid a lot of money to save my shame and embarrassment on this one. It's one thing if a movie is meant to be cheesy, but for some reason, I get the impression that this one was meant to be taken seriously. Yeah, I'd show off my snowboarding skills if I were being chased by someone intent on killing me...I mean I am that good. Of course the thug chasing Sean Astin was doing helicopters too, as if they were choreagraphed by someone in junior high school...

What a waste. I pity the fool who thinks this was a worthy work.

This film is made by the same guy who made the infamous film, Time Chasers which was a great episode of MST3K. It is nice to see he continued to make films and to see that he has significantly improved since his time traveling film. I think he also did a large spider film that also was much better than Time Chasers. That being said, it is still pretty much a bad film, but it was a rather fun bad movie to watch as the film that is being copied in this one is Die Hard and maybe through in a dash of Cliffhanger.

The story has two dudes flying a plane with some sort of stuff on it that is radioactive. For some reason, the pilot decides to auger the plane down into the countryside; however, the other person who likes mango jam is still alive, that is until bald Bruce Campbell kills him! Soon, he and his super group of terrorist take over a ski lodge while Sean Astin finds the package the guy wants and he somehow has to save the day by not doing a very good job. Then again, the FBI guys do an even more terrible job trying to stop the terrorist and Sean is just a guy who finds people on the mountain and they are actual cops.

The film could have been better with more action, but the action scenes with the exception of the last one are short lived. Something you would expect from a movie that probably does not have a very big budget. Then again, who would expect them to be able to procure the talents of Sean Astin, Bruce Campbell and Stacy Keach? They are not just cameo roles either, they are all in this film a significant amount of time.

So, not that great, but still an entertaining film nonetheless. Still not sure what Bruce Campbell's ultimate goal was or if he was really as close to death as they made him out to be or if it was really his birthday. Also, not sure how they got power back on as they blew up one power station, sawed through wires and ripped wires out of a pole. I mean, a tree falls on the lines where I am and the crap can be out for seven or eight hours!

Let me start off by saying I am a huge Bruce Campbell fan. Almost everything he does is great entertainment. Things that come to mind are Evil Dead II, Army of Darkness, Brisco County, Xena, and even Jack of All Trades.

So when I saw Icebreaker was playing on Showtime, I thought it might be fun. I was disappointed. I am no movie critic, so let me just describe the movie as bad. Now, some Bruce Campbell movies, like Evil Dead II, are so bad that they are hilarious, and that makes them good. Icebreaker is just plain bad. The plot is silly, the dialog is uninspired, and even the action is tedious, that is, unless you really like skiing and machine guns.

It is a shame, because it looked like Icebreaker had a decent budget. I got the impression that about halfway through, everyone realized it was a dud, but they had no choice but to finish it. Next time, someone needs to read the script before they start shooting.

Terrorists take over a ski resort in search of some "plutonium stolen from the Russians" that went down in the woods. Sean Astin, looking just as he did in "The Goonies", scampers earnestly around the mountain as a member of the Ski Patrol, spending most of his actual time running away from the machine gun-wielding intruders as they blindly shoot at him. His biggest concern is not the radioactive material which could incinerate the entire mountain, but the fact that he is late to a lunch date with his fiancee and her father, played by Stacy Keach. Chrome dome Bruce Campbell is the haughty leader of the terrorists, dying from some unspecified disease. Nice scenery, and a fairly exciting chase scene on skis, snowboards, and snowmobile, but what's the point?

First off, i cannot believe that ANYONE has recommended this movie and, OH YES, they have indeed. I caught this load of stink on network TV, luckily, not parting with any cash. It is TERRIBLE! The only redeeming feature of this movie is that it lowers the bar so much that Batteries Not Included may be resurrected and released by Criterion. I watch a lot of movies and some are bad, but if there is one thing that makes the viewing of a movie an awful experience it is feeling embarrassed for everyone involved with the making of it. PLEASE, do yourself a favor, if you are tempted to rent this or, God help us, buy this, or if it is on TV...READ A BOOK, GO FOR A WALK, WRITE A SCRIPT! Chances are if you are consulting IMDb for anything, then you could write, direct, and star in a better movie, much better, than this. Many compare this to Die-hard on a small scale, but that is a movie worth watching every few years, this is a movie that brings shame to low budget indie films. I love Bruce Campbell but you can't really do anything all that interesting with a horrible script. The fat hobbit is decent in films with great scripts. Do you see where I am going with this? A bad script is a bad script is a bad script and nothing can really make up for that, certainly not lame special effects and abominable acting. It does take place on a ski resort, and if you like ski movies that teeter on the fine line between trash and cult treasure, then I recommend watching Hot Dog The Movie. At least you'll laugh WITH the cast and enjoy the guilty pleasure of cheap titillation. My official scoring for this movie is 1 out of 10 because one isn't presented the option of 0 out of 10. Ed Wood would've relieved himself on this script before finishing page 10. If you are a filmmaker interested in learning everything you shouldn't do, watch it. Anyone else, including family of those involved, just pretend like it never existed and go outside and look at the sky for a couple of minutes, breathe in the air, and run your hands through the blades of grass at your feet.