Icebreaker

The plot in Icebreaker is such a mess that it doesn't merit much discussion. A group of terrorists descend on a Vermont ski resort looking for a downed plane carrying a nuclear device. In the end, however, the nuclear device is all but an afterthought as the head baddie sets his sights on the lesser goal of blowing up a ski gondola with one person on board. Ski patrol member Matt is on the case to stop the terrorists and save his fiancé (who is quite naturally the person on the gondola).

How in the name of all that is Holy did the makers of Icebreakers get a cast that includes Sean Astin, Stacy Keach, and Bruce Campbell? Were these guys that hard-up for work? Do they enjoy skiing so much that a free weekend on the slopes of Killington was enough to entice them? Did the producers have compromising photos? I just don't get it. Astin may be a good actor, but he's not my image of an action hero. When I think of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chuck Norris, and Rob Van Dam - Sean Astin is not the next name that comes to mind. Stacy Keach phones in his performance from the State line. It's obvious he has no interest in Icebreakers. As for Campbell, as much as I love him, not even he can save this thing. Bruce's charm, so evident in the Evil Dead Series or Brisco County or even Burn Notice, is not here. Like Keach, he doesn't look overly interested in the project.

But the acting's not the problem - it's the muddled plot. I watched the whole thing and still have no idea what was motivating the terrorists. They want the nuclear device simply because that's what a terrorist would do. The take-over of the ski resort seemed so unnecessary. Their plan had not gone so off-track that they still couldn't have secretly gotten their weapon and disappeared. Why bring so much attention to their activities? The answer - it's in the script. The whole thing this is a complete mess. Character motivation in Icebreakers makes absolutely no sense.

I'll give Icebreakers a generous 3/10.

Let me start off by saying I am a huge Bruce Campbell fan. Almost everything he does is great entertainment. Things that come to mind are Evil Dead II, Army of Darkness, Brisco County, Xena, and even Jack of All Trades.

So when I saw Icebreaker was playing on Showtime, I thought it might be fun. I was disappointed. I am no movie critic, so let me just describe the movie as bad. Now, some Bruce Campbell movies, like Evil Dead II, are so bad that they are hilarious, and that makes them good. Icebreaker is just plain bad. The plot is silly, the dialog is uninspired, and even the action is tedious, that is, unless you really like skiing and machine guns.

It is a shame, because it looked like Icebreaker had a decent budget. I got the impression that about halfway through, everyone realized it was a dud, but they had no choice but to finish it. Next time, someone needs to read the script before they start shooting.

A plane crashes near the Killington ski resort. On board is a container with a radioactivity warning--in the Cyrillic alphabet.

A group of terrorists, led by Sandra and the terminally ill Greig, are willing to kill, and they do. The power goes out at the resort, and contact is lost with the outside world, except for incoming calls to the resort.

Meg wants to marry ski patrol member Matt, who cleans banks during the off-season. Her rich father Bill does not approve. Through creative and humorous editing, as Meg explains Matt's good qualities, we get to see whether he actually has them. Matt is dealing with some of the terrorists, along with forest ranger Beck, who provides comic relief.

Oh, if only the entire movie had the quality of the music with the opening credits, repeated in the final scenes before the closing credits. Beethoven's Ninth Symphony (the part that included the familiar 'Ode to Joy') performed by the Tblisi Symphony Orchestra. The credits didn't list the name of the excellent tenor soloist (I think he was a tenor, anyway). Magnificent.

I liked Bruce Campbell better as the comical hero Brisco County. He has his moments here as a smart-aleck villain, but I wouldn't say he could make a career out of playing a bad guy.

I felt sorry for Stacy Keach, who apparently was going through a career slump. He did show how talented he is, and if you blink you'll miss it.

Resort manager Clay came across as an incompetent idiot, and later as a poor excuse for a human being. I'm not sure this was a good thing. Beck was a more likable loser, and better acted too.

There were some interesting chase scenes, including one with a great stunt snowboarder. And plenty of explosions for those not obsessed with them. Also lots of tension toward the end. Early in the movie when the terrorists were in New York City, there was a great overhead shot of what may have been the Empire State Building.

But overall, there was nothing really special here.

The only way I will watch this movie is on Rifftrax. The comments are hilarious and are the only way this movie is good. Otherwise the movie is overly nonsensical and ridiculous, there's not even a cohesive plot.

Ski patrol officer Sean Astin tries to save the day, his parents and his girl from an evil and deranged madman (Hollywood goof-ball Bruce Campbell) who has a nuclear device at a winter resort. Campbell leads some crazed terrorists in the venture and the only one who can save the group of hostages is the baby-faced Astin. Stupid and unintentionally hilarious venture for all involved as Campbell steals the show (as he usually does in sorry ventures) as a comical and bald-headed villain that will make you think of him as a very poor man's Gene Hackman from "Superman". Nothing really to recommend. Might have camp value for some, but that does not endear it. Turkey (0 stars out of 5).