The 700 Club

Before I start, I just need to something straight: I have absolutely nothing against Jesus. And I have absolutely no problem with anyone who has faith. Any questions? Good. Let's move on.

Have you ever watched someone on TV so incredibly grating and annoying you wish they would just shrivel up and die? If not, welcome to the colorful world of The 700 Club; a news show where earth shattering topics such as school prayer, army chaplains, Christian music, and age-defying milkshakes are delivered into the hungry hands of red-state America.

Three of the most painfully looking news anchors in the history of television host a 30 minute show about the Christian life. While that may sound uplifting, don't be fooled. This show targets and destroys (much like a heat seeking missile) Muslims, Jews, Hindus, non- Christian "cults", gays, feminists, democrats, Christian liberals, and everything else under the sun for the world's problems. This makes the show about as comfortable as sitting on a long plane flight next to someone who asks you if you've heard the good news about Jesus.

But the worst of this show can be said in two words: Gordon Robertson. This idiot stands in front of the camera as if he's the salt of the earth, permanently portraying his smug smile and ghastly hair to the masses. Not only that but his forehead is so monstrously big, it actually distracts you from listening to what he has to say.

The 700 Club is a show that's entertaining if you're looking for a laugh but case in point: if you're looking for uplifting spiritual guidance, The 700 Club will do nothing for help.

Except people apparently buy into this garbage! As shows like "Moral Orel" have shown, even if you tried to make the most outrageous, over-the-top parody of evangelism you could possibly think of, it wouldn't come close to the hilarity of this show. It's hard to tell what's even going on when you're watching it. Is it a news show? A talk show? Who knows!? They start out by reporting on various international news stories, but at seemingly random points, the news is interrupted by this odd, troll-like little man with a forehead bigger than his entire face, mumbling and laughing and generally being creepy.

Pat Robertson doesn't even seem like such a bad guy at first glance. He just seems like a senile, yet harmless old coot stuck in his archaic beliefs (like most of our grandparents). But this is a man who has called for an assassination, who has befriended and offered aid to not one, but TWO murderous dictators, who has illegally used donation money to run diamond mines, who has SUPPORTED forced abortions in China, and who regularly implies that Caucasians (straight American male Caucasians in particular) are superior to all other races.

Still, this would all be funny, except that he apparently has a large enough fan base to keep his little show on the air 40 years later (either that, or enough money to bribe some TV executives who don't give a damn what they show). The idiocy of the show becomes alarming when you realize that some people, somewhere, must be watching it and hanging onto every word. Even when Robertson has repeatedly shown how corrupt he is, people still listen to him. I don't know if it's funny or scary. I guess a healthy mixture of both.

I watched a few episodes out of morbid curiosity while in the US. Never before have I seen a programme which so overtly tells its audience what to think, how to feel, how to respond and what to do. Pat Robertson can barely disguise his personal loathing for Europeans, single mothers, gays and lesbians, atheists, humanists, and a virtual pantheon of non-American, non-fundamentalist-Christian, non-rightwing spooks, demons and bugbears that populate his (and indeed his audience's) paranoid delusion.

Here are some examples of Pat Robertsons dubiously claimed "relatively good track record" on predictions

In his widely reported comments from the January 2 edition of the Christian Broadcasting Network's The 700 Club, during which he predicted that there would be "very serious terrorist attacks" and "mass killing" in the United States in the "second half" of 2007, host Pat Robertson boasted that he had "a relatively good track record" on earlier predictions. But a review of Robertson's 2006 New Year's predictions undermines that claim. He predicted, for example, that:

* "President Bush is going to strengthen." WRONG

* "The fall elections will be inconclusive, but the outcome of the war and the success of the economy will leave the Republicans in charge." WRONG

* "The war in Iraq is going to come to a successful conclusion. We'll begin withdrawing troops before the end of this year." WAY WRONG

Further, as a January 3 Associated Press article reported, Robertson has a history of making dubious predictions:

The broadcaster predicted in January 2004 that President Bush would easily win re-election. Bush won 51% of the vote that fall, beating Democratic Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts. WRONG

In 2005, Robertson predicted that Bush would have victory after victory in his second term. He said Social Security reform proposals would be approved WRONG YET AGAIN!

He claims to speak directly with god... If so god has quite the sense of humor watching Pat make a fool of himself again and again..

A talk show in which christian views, right wing political views, and the agenda of the republican party are brought forth in a one hour news and interview style format. Pat Robertson is truly a media master mind as he lays out his media message and supports his political agenda in a show that is one hour of religious propaganda. (yes I would say that to his face) I recommend this show to those who enjoy this sort of of programming. I dont recommend this program to liberals or people offended by heavy attacks on liberal lifestyles and liberal media. I believe this man to be a polite man but gone is the shows original format of no news and more ministry. His endorsement of the republican party lays it out as a party of god so to speak when there are just as many christians who are libererals or democrates .....yet he never acknowledges that.