Turkey Television

For those of you who are fans, you know that various stand-up comics performed on "Turkey TV." Dana Carvey was one of them and he did a hilariously funny pre-Garth impression. Glasses and all. Too bad they don't show re-runs anymore...

"Turkey Television" was a comedy show on Nickelodeon from the mid 1980s. I watched this religiously as a kid, along with "Out of Control" and "You Can't Do That On Television". Each episode was a collection of miscellaneous short comedy segments. There was an exact number of clips they'd use in each episode; I think it was 45. Each clip would start off with subtitles at the bottom, letting you know who did it. Actor/singer Meatloaf did a few promos for them, including one where he impersonated a turkey.

There were some sources they'd pull more frequently than others, but it was a diverse collection none the less. You'd see short wordless cartoon clips (many from Germany), novelty song music videos, samples from British comedy shows like "The Pink Medicine Show", independent short films, the bad advice columnist "Dr. Joyce Brothers", gross-out food comedian "Eddie Slobbo" (these last two of which I've never seen anywhere else), stand-up comedy, and other assorted oddities.

As for the clips, they were sometimes a hit or miss, really. Naturally everything had to be clean for Nickelodeon. But they did find some truly funny stuff. Early stand-up material from Dana Carvey was not uncommon. There were also some skits where he played a sadistic German-accented dentist. Turkey TV even managed to squeeze in some George Carlin, like his "idiots and maniacs" rant on driving.

It's been 20 years since I've seen an episode, but I can still remember a lot of the clips vividly. I don't know if anybody in recent years has built a TV show on this same principle of source variety, but somebody should. As an adult, I now host my own comedy clip show on the radio, and although I've idolized many different comedians over the years, I do have to wonder if some of the inspiration for my show can be traced back to Turkey Television.

"That's how a turkey created TV ... That's right! "That's right, a turkey created TV "It sounds stupid but, Oh, take one look and you'll know that a turkey created TV!"

Poor Philo T. Farnsworth, could he have envisioned this?

My younger brother and I used to watch this pretty wacky show. I remember it had comedy clips: like Robin Williams singing Elmer Fudd singing Bruce Springsteen or Dana Carvey singing the "Choppin' Broccoli" song. It also had some short foreign language slapstick comedy sketches. There were also strange music videos like Commander Cody's "Two Cheeseburgers Side Order of Fries" Barnes and Barnes' "Fish Heads" (also staples of Dr. Demento's occasional MTV specials) and Gerard Blanchard's "Rock Amadour."

Turkey Television was a spin-off of the hugely popular "You Can't Do That on Television," another Canadian show from Ottawa, Ontario, Canada. Turkey Television or Turkey TV didn't last as long as it could have been. They would take skits, cartoons, and sketches that featured popular Christine McGlade and other alums of "You Can't Do That on Television" but without the green slime. Turkey Television was fine but it wasn't great as I remembered it. I don't miss it as much as I miss "You Can't Do That on Television" because there was really no cast of regular characters. The sketches and cartoons if I remember came from all over the world. They allowed cartoons and sketches and skits that the audience wouldn't normally see without it on Turkey Television. We could use some Turkey Television today with the increased animation industry and computer generated cartoons that we can watch and enjoy whether we are kids or adults.

Four score and several years ago, we're talking pre-TV, Thurman Turkey strolled along the shores to see what he could see. He sniffed the flowers, felt the breezes, thought a thought or two; as he was quoted later, "There's nothing left to do." Well one day ol' Thurman Turkey showed up missing from the flock. He slipped the Magna Carta where he was first on Plymoth Rock... [continues, this is all from memory] I loved this show!