Sassy Sue

please don't bother with this film, it's beyond garbage, i'd give it lower than a 1 but it didn't dissolve my eyes like a 0 in theory should, the actor playing the retard boy is the worst, the actor playing the ladies man, willard, is just too irritating to want to watch sleazing it up with cute chicks, the actress playing the mother is missing a tooth! this movie isn't short enough, this type of no-budget nudie film is supposed to be 70 minutes or less, for a sleaze flick this movie has a lot of guys having sex or masturbating with their flies up! the women are nice to look at but the sex scenes go on far too long, ie. "why don't i undress you and look you over, suck your breasts, then have intercourse, then i'll muff dive for awhile, then i'll teach you how to perform fellatio, then let's finish up with intercourse again and i'll keep my long johns on the whole time" blech

This is a wonderful sleazy little film set around the antic's of Willard, a inept Chicken Farm owner and his carnal pursuits 'down on the farm'

First of all our Willard has a tete a tete with the aptly named HoneyChild whose curvy figure and filthy little ways drive Willard crazy.

But one is not enough and soon enough Willard has a hankering for something else and it aint Sally it is Sue his prize cow! Thats right, his cow...."she pretty" Willard muses.

It gets as odd as it can, and the carnal carnival has only just got started.

Well worth a look

Spirited farmyard frolics. The main downside is the 'Dukes of Hazard' style dopey silent film style tumbling antics BUT upside is the lovely Sharon Kelly and curvaceous friends and despite any silliness all is forgiven as the ladies show what they are made of and how to have a good time.

Everybody really seems to be having fun and this makes for a very watchable movie, even if one or two scenes go on a little long or the guys having sex with their long johns on is off putting.

Personally I find the prancing and posy, gay looking guys from today's porn more off putting, so I'll stick with this.

The title refers to a cow that's the object of Pa Willard's (Patrick Wright) idiot hick son, Junior (John Tull).Pa spends his time between making moonshine (like any respectable hillbilly), bedding the local ladies, and attempting to get said ladies to seduce Junior to get his fixations off that damn cow. Decidedly not nearly as good or enjoyable as "the Pigkeeper's Daughter" was, this yawn-inducing low budget Hicksploitation flick, is helped a tad by having remarkable beautiful women (Rachel Wolf excluded) in various forms of undress, but they can only do so much with the lousy script and sub-par soft-core scenes (the bathtub scene being a rather notable exception, as it's the only hot one). For the most most unremarkable in any way, shape, or form, this film is highly forgettable if you plan on watching it at all. I'm even hesitant to recommend it to die hard Sharon Kelly fans.

Eye Candy: Sandy Carey, Tallie Cochrane, Karen Cooknell, & Sharon Kelly show all

My Grade: D

Something Weird's DVD extras (R1): Seven minute gallery of Harry Novak exploitation art & photos with radio-spot rarities; short film: "the Old Man's Bride"; Theatrical trailer; and trailers for "Country Cuzzins", "Country Hooker", "Midnite Plowboy", "Southern Comforts", "Tobacco Roody", & "the Pigkeeper's Daughter" (the last of which is also included in this double-feature DVD)