Mike Hammer, Private Eye

A good detective can spot a fugazy in his sleep. That suit at the bar with the phony Rolex might fool that blonde with the big eyes, but guess what, pal, she's no blonde. And those big eyes? Well, let's just leave it at that.

There once was a pretty good series called. "The New Mike Hammer"(1984-89). It was good, sometimes very good. I liked the cast. I liked the plots. I liked the witty dialogue. OK, maybe at times it was only half-witty, but I liked it. And I looked forward to watching it. Sure it was filled with eye candy, but so what. I like candy, see, and lots of it. Keep it coming!

Which brings us to this piece of ... sure, it's called "Mike Hammer, Private Eye", but if you look closely, you'll see "Roleks" written all over it! It's got it all - crummy acting, ridiculous dialogue, non-existent sets, and all the production value of a student film. Yeah, OK it's got eye candy. Well, somewhat.

And geez, Stacy, I know she's your wife, but why do we have to suffer?

I must disagree with TC-4. The "grittiness" he describes, I would call "cheap".

I think the original CBS series of 1983-87 was superior to this one. With Don Stroud as Pat Chambers, Donna Denton as "The Face" Lindsay Bloom as Velda and the other regular supporting actors, it was a class act all around.

While Shannon Whirry makes a tasty Velda, the rest of this production was just a bargain-basement attempt at bringing back a good series. Obviously, it didn't work, with so few episodes shot.

Stacy Keach was good as always, but I miss his previous co-stars.

The episode I just watched was number 20 of 26 that are packaged in one Mike Hammer set from 1997 and '98. The production values were low budget filming in Ventura, CA for New York. There are some exterior establishing shots of The Big Apple, but much of the location sets look like anywhere but New York.

The episode is called The Maya Connection. Some of the dialog is haunting and maybe prophetic. The very first line in this show is a voice-over saying, "Saddam Hussein... We should have got him when we had the chance." The accompanying visuals show someone loading a rifle.

There are a couple of establishing shots that show The World Trade Center towers. Later in the story we hear a voice-over saying, "The real victims of war are the people who live at Ground Zero." It all takes on a new meaning in today's world.

Maxwell Caufield is good as the guest star. I could visualize him in a James Bond type role. He is a secret agent in this. Maxwell is at his best in Grease 2. There is a lot of action and plenty of wise cracks, especially from Stacy Keach, our Mike Hammer.

The story is much too disjointed to follow. It doesn't matter. It has some action and comedy and some really weird stuff. A scene in the back seat of a taxi seems to be an Altoids commercial. The best comedy sighting in this is Stacy in drag as an Iraqi woman.

Worth the $11.99 for 26 episodes.

Tom Willett

Stacy Keach's Mike Hammer can be divided into the 80s version and then this one, the 90s version. In my opinion the 80s Hammer was much better. Look, call me a chauvinist, but beautiful women and cleavage are part of the Mike Hammer mystique. It's one of the things that made the 80s Hammer so popular. Unfortunately for the "new & improved" 90s private eye, Keach's wife Malgosia Tomassi, who also plays the useless yoga instructor, insisted there be less emphasis on skin. Can you say Yoko Ono?? I knew you could.

Also, say you're a private dick in New York. You carry a .45 for protection. Suddenly you round a corner and get jumped by two huge gorillas who begin pounding you with baseball bats. Obviously they intend to kill you or at least maim the crap out of you. Do you...

A) Grab your gun and repay the favor, or B) Lay there like an 88-year-old woman and take it.

If you said "A" then you're more of a man than THIS Hammer is. I don't know how many episodes I've seen this pathetic scene played out. I kept yelling at the TV "Grab Betsy, dumb ass, that's what you have her for!!" But alas, Keach never heard me. (BTW, "Betsy" is his gun) Until they release the 80s Mike Hammer on DVD, I'd suggest watching two Hammer movies Keach did: "Murder Me, Murder You," and "More Than Murder," both from the 80s. And both B.M.T. (Before Malgosia Tomassi).

Stacy Keach is the only reason this 2nd incarnation of him as Mike Hammer is watchable.

I was a huge fan of the original Stacy Keach Mike Hammer series. Along with a lot of TV movies he did with the same character, he created a pretty good little franchise for himself. That being said, this 2nd incarnation of this great detective is just not that great. It has quite a few earmarks of a low budget and the first is the actors. All of em except Shannon Whirry are just plain bad. Shane Conrad is an absolute joke in this. You can tell he got the job just by who his father was. Worse than the acting is the script writing. The dialogue is so bad it's not even borderline laughable or believable, it's just laughable and unbelievable.

Regardless of the fact that this show pale's in comparison to Stacy Keachs' original series, he's the reason this show is still worth a look. He plays the same character with the same flair. It's petty obvious that Keach brought this character back to make a buck. It was successful the first time so why not try again. It just wasn't as good this time around.

Most know when they hear "Mike Hammer" they think of Mr. Keach himself. There's a reason for that, he is Mike Hammer(sorta).