Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfolds

Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfold isn't an action or adventure movie and it can barely be called sci-fi. This is a low budget R rated comedy. The R rating is as important to the film as it being a comedy. One of the main purposes of this movie is to show scantily clad topless women. This consists of three of the women competing and posing for a centerfold shoot topless. The topless scenes are not as frequent as you would think and there are no raunchy sexual situations. It really can't be called just a skin flick. The plot is poor, acting poor, and special effects poor. The 60 foot, occasionally topless, and frequently scantily clad star of the movie, J.J. North is the only thing holding this movie together. The comedy is funny because it's so lame and simplistic. This film is one of those that some would say 'It's so bad, it's good' and I think that is exactly what they were going for when making it. It's something you want to watch when you don't want to watch anything serious.

"Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfold" takes an already cheesy original, "Attack of the 50 foot Woman" and makes it cheesier! But it does so in such an engagingly cornball manner that you can't help but smile even as you groan at the inane plot and low rent special effects.

The cast are all from the "golly, gosh" school of acting. They know full well they won't be up for Oscars so they lay it on shamelessly. There's an affectionate parody of Hugh Hefner. In a cute touch Michelle Bauer, who has stripped in dozens of b-flicks, plays a fully clothed science researcher.

Lead actress JJ North and her fellow ingenues are amply endowed but the nudity, toplessness actually, isn't raunchy. They're too busy hamming it up to heat it up. There's not all that much nudity in the film, so don't expect a flesh parade.

Not worth buying, but a good weekly rental.

This movie was one of the first that I ever bought on DVD; for some reason I've held on to it, mostly due to its historical value as one of the most disappointing films I have ever watched. The title led me to believe that I would be watching beautiful, naked big-titted women growing to impossible sizes and ruining everyone's s*** for 90 solid minutes. Instead, I get 2 minutes of rampage, and 88 minutes of 60 a 60 foot tall woman moping around in a circus tent, and a bunch of evil guys trying to exploit her. Who do these guys think they are? I want chicks, not smarmy guys. In addition, there's this annoying sub-plot involving a giant rat. Who's idea was that? They could have at least made it a giant cat in order to incorporate some pussy jokes. There are a couple of good boob gags in this one, but on the whole, it is a massively wasted opportunity to exploit women who have been the victims of science. Where's Daryl Hannah when you need her?

I and my friends have watched this several times. Its amusing with a couple vodka tonics and good friends. Additionally, it has JJ North and Tammy Parks. I would watch either one of the read the phone book. Sadly, JJ is out of the biz now, which really is sad since she had potential that went beyond just her natural good looks. However, the days of b-movie actresses rising above a steady diet of bad films are over. Rene Zellweger may have been the last. Who would have guess that one of the stars of Chicago started out in Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

In anycase, its fun and the women are gorgeous. Come back JJ.

Where are you Kristine Debell?

This one leaves us with the age old question: which was worse the plot or the acting? Well, actually it was probably the directing or the editing. The highlight of this exercise in absurdity is the cameo appearances of Disney's Tommy Kirk, Stanley (My 3 Sons) Livingston, and Russ Tamblyn (who also was unfortunate enough to cameo in 'Cabin Boy').