Baywatch Nights

Writing this review is difficult for me. This is because I want to give Baywatch Nights a break, and so I may end up being a little biased. I know it wasn't great, but I think it was a good idea:

An "adult" version of Baywatch that sees the city as it is after hours. Whether that means more action, an investigative procedural twist, or more a horror twist... the makers seem undecided. One thing it does mean though, is less sex. The name may imply the opposite, but that's besides the point.

Before I continue, I must state that the two seasons were of differing genres: Season 1 - Mystery, basic procedural/detective fiction; Season 2 - Mystery, supernatural horror.

The reason I believe it was a solid, worthwhile idea is that Season 1's title sequence perfectly encapsulates what I feel the spirit of the show should have been (especially the theme music). Neon and car chases and night-time sneaking around the marina. Sexy, but not in a bikini/muscle beach way, more in a Miami Vice way. But less gritty crime orientated than Miami Vice; more light-hearted.

To its merit, Season 1 was visually pretty good in my opinion. To have taken away the sand and sun of Baywatch completely would have been a mistake... enough does remain (just). Some people may say that narrowly limiting a series' setting will naturally limit the potential for plot ideas. But Bergerac was a crime drama with a somewhat similar setting, yet was able to keep putting out complex stories.

So the problem with Baywatch Nights was that the two seasons were too different in genre/tone from each other - and from the mother series. What I feel would have worked better would be to have kept the action-drama of Baywatch as its base, but continue with the Private Investigator premise (an episode that gets the balance right is Bad Blades S1E2), and to just reconcile the procedural/horror differences episode by episode. So there'd be some slightly supernatural episodes, some slightly horror episodes, some half-procedural action episodes, but all mixed up in the run rather than separated by season. And more references to the Baywatch universe, a couple more appearances by Baywatch characters.

So enough of what I think *should have* been done. What do I think of what *had been* done?

Each episode is self-contained - which I like - but despite this, too often plots are stretched out within individual episodes. However the character chemistry is great and the dialogue between the core leads (Mitch and Ryan) is amusing. The second season didn't take itself too seriously, and it had some entertaining moments; it just suffered from too much filler. Basically I feel that the show had a longer slot than it needed.

In conclusion: Baywatch Nights is to this day widely dismissed and ridiculed, but personally I believe it to be quite underrated (especially due to expectations following the demise of the massively popular Baywatch). But I'm not saying it was high quality or anything. It had unfulfilled potential.

Some call 'Baywatch' the single worst series in TV history. I disagree.

The series was about much more than just silicone T and A, it was about... Well OK, that is what the show was all about.

'Baywatch Nights' IS the WORST series in TV history! The mere concept of this premise is insane. NO ONE watched 'Baywatch' for the story lines, compelling characters, and certainly not the acting. We watched it for the silicone! 'Baywatch Nights' revolves around Mitch Buchannon (David Hasselhoff) and Garner the token black cop who appeared on 'Baywatch' every once and a while starting their own private detective agency. What's next? 'Al Bundy MD?' 'Tour of Duty' joins the peace movement? Or Superman develops a fear of flying? They're joined by Mark Harmon's sister Angie, best known as the voice of Darth Vader in 'Star Wars,' and finally an over the hill dumb blonde. No... not the good type of dumb blondes we're used to from 'Baywatch,' the bad type of dumb blondes whom aren't sexy.

Since the detectives work at night that means on swimming at the beach. Which means no swim suits, which means no dumb blonde life guards' silicone bouncing along the beach in swim suits! So why did anyone expect this series to be popular? What 'Baywatch Nights' did have was really bad story lines and even worse acting. No, the mysteries weren't interesting in any way shape or form.

The show could have worked if the silicone blondes from 'Baywatch' solved crimes during the day still in their swim uniforms.

Actually the show could have worked if the silicone blondes from 'Baywatch' mowed lawns still in their swim uniforms.

Cheese is what David Hasselhoff does best and it is replicated here in all it's glory.The original Baywatch was good.It had a huge following worldwide and brought in a lot of dollars.But this lame spin off with x-file style situations?It's terrible and that's putting it mildly.How could anyone possibly take Hasselhoffs character Mitch Buchanan seriously?Or come to think off it,could anyone take anything Hasselhoff has ever starred in seriously?Every time this show came on it was a reach for the remote moment.Thankfully in the UK and Ireland it was consigned to a graveyard slot of about 1.00am.Most people wouldn't have even bothered checking the listings for this piece of self indulgent crap.Basically an ego trip for Hasselhoff

Simply horrible. This is a spin-off show from Baywatch with Mitch running around with his police officer friend, playing detective. Bah, it's simply horrible...no original plots, boring and uncreative acting and way too predictable stories.

I am currently greatly disappointed by BAYWATCH NIGHTS. Imported from Amazon through a greedy, greedy shark that took a chunk out of me, and... Well, I knew David Hasselhoff is just too much and Gregalan Williams I won't even mention (king of the dorks?), but really, I've watched eight episodes so far, and the sex appeal is almost non-existent. Only the first episode, Pursuit, was worthy of being associated with BAYWATCH. Plus it's a really low-grade DVD with very weak graphics - I have those two with the dreary dark covers, not an inspiring sight to begin with. Avoid them. I have no idea if the even-more-expensive option available on Amazon has better resolution, but drivel in better resolution would remain just drivel.

It's more than enough that David Hasselhoff is in BAYWATCH. Allowing this poor excuse for a leading man into yet another series is a crime worthy of heinous torture, such as being forced to watch endless repeats of this drivel.

Lisa Stahl was cute in BAYWATCH, she is an all- time failure in BAYWATCH NIGHTS. She totally lost her sparkle. I can't quite make my mind up about Ryan McBride (Angie Harmon); she is at the very least the best part of the show, the only salvageable item, but I am not too fond of her either. Pretty soon I'll reach the Donna D'Errico episodes, but there's clearly not going to be any real magic in this show.

Amazon should reduce their price for this series considerably in the name of providing better value for money. It's worth about less than a tenth of their asking price.

ADDENDUM 20 June 2014. Watched the episode starting the new era of the First Season tonight, "Takeover" (coincidentally very aptly named), and Donna D'Errico graced my screen. Wow! New life breathed into a failing show. The episode was brighter, and I'm raising my score from 2 to 3. Pity this happened years and years ago, I'd have loved to send them a telegram (that long ago?) of congratulations!

By the way, last week I saw that messy tenth episode "Kind of a Drag". Storyline was absolutely ridiculous junk, but that girl in the underwater sequence, the bikini lovely, oh wow! How could they have NOT focused on her and instead opted for that drivel, a plethora of drag queens, David included? For shame!

But tonight, the outlook for the rest of the series looks much better.

ADDENDUM 13 October 2014. Finished watching Season 1 some weeks ago. The series did get more popular with me. So stick with it, just get past that dry spell. Be warned that this show is mostly aimed at schoolboys, I'd say. The kind of 'frights' and levels of suspense might affect toddlers, but the beauty of the actresses is what it is about for me. Season Two at ELectricLadyLand scheduled for South African Winter 2015.

ADDENDUM, 30 September 2015. Season 2 is very, very bad. What were these people thinking? Donna D'Errico mostly not there, not likely because of her limited acting abilities, because David cannot act for licking out old toffee wrappers, and he mugs it up the whole freaking, embarrassing time. Must have laughed all the way to the bank with his double income from the added show. Angie Harmon tries her damnedest best, but nothing can save this hokey junk. Some episodes are beneath contempt, like "Frozen Out Of Time", which scraped the very bottom of the lowly barrel. Still recovering from the corniness of "The Servant" as I sit here, I have yet to watch the rest, but there is very little hope. Though "Circle of Fear" did meet my approval, and brought a spark of hope early on in the season, see my separate review for that episode. One winner, of course, only proves that they COULD HAVE DONE BETTER THROUGHOUT.

Three stars, all for Angie Harmon, without her, like the name of that Brett Easton Ellis novel-turned- movie, LESS THAN ZERO. Donna might have been worth an extra star, but typically of BAYWATCH stars, she's AWOL almost always, and if not, kept on the sideline of the script.

Give this one a miss. BAYWATCH fans hungry for beach bodies will in any case be sorely disappointed. Even more so in Season 2, which is worse than pathetic, especially by 1996 standards. This is a series that should never have existed, Angie Harmon's time was just wasted, and what's seen of Donna D'Errico belonged on BAYWATCH. As for David, hammy old David, pack him up in an airplane, and toss him out over Germany. They'd lap him up. And keep him there. And spare us his dumb presence! Take the other unmentioned lot along too, they are beyond hopeless. Meanwhile, cast Donna in a part where she gets to be tickled silly while trying to hide coyly behind only the three stars I've given this undeserving drivel. :) yeah baby