T-Force

OK....mix together elements of Die Hard, Blade Runner and the Terminator and hey presto - welcome T-Force! Yes it's yet more B-movie heaven from director Richard Pepin who apparently not only content to steal basic elements from the aforementioned classic flicks, additionally directly lifts scenes from them to(!), most notably an almost scene for scene swipe of big Arnie's attack on the police station from the original Terminator film. Well, normally I would berate any such blatant plagiarism with the utmost haste and deduct points from the offending film like there was no tomorrow......but you know what? - This film is simply so much damned fun that I can't but help to love it and actually find the rip off elements to actually ADD to it's bizarre charm (a factor which so often occurs in B-movies in fact).

Also adding to the enjoyment is the assembled cast including (in the beginning at least) Vernon (Bennett!) Wells, a still incredibly sexy Erin Gray (damn, I used to fancy her like crazy when she was in Buck Rogers!) and he of the cleft'd chin (no not Kirk Douglas!) Jack Scalia. I've just got to award another point to this for its inclusion of one of the most stupid excuses for a sex scene ever in which two of the cybernauts get down to it......after looking at a dirty mag(!!!!) Tremendously entertaining stuff from start to finish! Alas, shame there wasn't a sequel (yet.....)

Lately I have been renting some relatively unknown B movies due to the fact that some of them star actors who have managed to break into A movies out today. I am also intrigued to see what can be done on a small budget and above all I feel it deserves the watch that a Hollywood blockbuster also deserves. I have to say though that after watching this film I have decided that B movies are an absolute no-no.

This monstrosity of a movie is called T-Force standing for Terminal Force, which is a group of cyber naughts (not robots) that look completely human and work for the LAPD. They are sent in on dangerous missions when it is unsafe for humans. The story opens when a skyscraper is taken under siege by a man who demands some prisoners are released. When the hijacker proves that he isn't afraid to throw his weight around, the police send in the T-Force with orders to kill the kidnappers. These orders however are bought into question when one cyber naught kills the lead terrorist at the expense of six hostages, something the Police Chief and Mayor are extremely unhappy about and decide to have the T-Force programme terminated.

When the cyber naughts are bought in to be deconstructed, they turn on their maker, demanding that their 'self-preservation' takes priority. I put 'self-preservation' in quote mark as it has to be word of the film as one character must say it a hundred times in ten minutes. That's ten times a minute. That's once every six seconds!! It is so annoying. Right to carry on, three of the four cyber naughts (another word completely over used) go on a rampage to defend themselves, one however remains behind believing that he should obey orders. He has human individuality apparently. As he is willing to track down his fellow T- Force he is partnered with a man who hates robots!! Shock, didn't see that one coming. They then set off to find and destroy the rogue 'cyber naughts'. Lost interest in a plot that has been done so many times yet? I have.

What we actually get here is a film that rips off any Hollywood film that was made just prior to this was. We start off with Die Hard (skyscraper being taken hostage), moving on to Die Hard 2 (demanding prisoners are released), to The Terminator (a carbon copy of the police station massacre), then moves on to a dodgy porn segment (typical porn music played over the top of a male and female robot stripping each other!!) and then the finale is just like Mad Max, the vehicles are identical. Seriously is there no originality out there?

The acting also doesn't help the film as it is seriously dreadful. The dialogue is corny, cheesy and any other word you can think of that describes lame and tacky. The action scenes seem very set up with explosions just happening anywhere and everywhere. We get cyber naughts that can't shoot the lead cop for love nor money but can take out five men in five shots and robots that seem to be as human as anyone else other than the fact that they can strip off their skin and show their robotic hand (and yes one of them does give the finger!). One of the best bits is when a terrorist points a rocket launcher at a police car and the policeman jumps inside it to protect himself! What is that all about?

You know I wasted an hour and a half on this movie and now I feel like I am wasting my time in writing a review for it, so I will leave you with this one comment, do not watch this movie!

0.5 / 5

Tolli

The Story: Terrorists take over an embassy. Terminal Force, an elite team of android counter-terrorists wipe out the terrorists but accidentally kill six hostages. Faced with shutdown, the androids go on the run. Police lieutenant Jack Floyd is partnered with Cain, the sole remaining T-Force android, & sent to find & destroy the renegade androids.

This effort by action director Richard Pepin is unstinting when it comes to ripping off other films. The first half-hour shamelessly rips off "Die Hard", with a well-dressed terrorist taking over a building. But after this second-rate scene, "T-Force", which retools itself as a robot version of "Universal Soldier", actually becomes enjoyable. Lead actor Jack Scalia should get an award for getting into a performance above the call of duty, making his role as the bitter robot-hating cop extremely likable. Bobby Johnston, in the role as Jack's android partner, works with him admirably. On the other side of the coin, Evan Lurie does another of his bad performances, spouting campy one-liners as he dispatches his victims. As is the case with all of Pepin's films, "T-Force" has a lot of action scenes, plenty of heavy artillery & massive explosions, ensuring that action junkies will get their fix and more.

Ha! Why watch Die Hard, Universal Soldier, Terminator, Blade Runner or any buddy cop movie when you can just watch T-Force? That's all those films rolled into one. I nearly forgot the post-apocalyptic battle using mad max-style buggies! And all the other crap! T-Force is so awesome that we're introduced to T-Force by them posing in a futuristic landscape while stuff burns behind them, the first of many scenes that end with a character walking away from an explosion. We also get the plot of Die Hard condensed into a twenty minutes sequence as Vernon Wells turns up in a quick Klaus Kinski-like cameo, taking over a skyscraper, killing some dudes, then having all his men slaughtered by a bunch of cyborgs who discuss Assimov's rules of robotics while totally throwing those rules out of the window. Also, many people are thrown out of windows in this film too.

Jack Scalia also turns up as a grizzled cop who's probably correct in assuming that the cyborgs are a little heavy handed as they manage to kill about half a dozen civilians while blowing Vernon Wells to bits. This causes a lot of talk about primary directives and such like but you know what that means: The robots go rogue, following their own crazy logic. Except for the one that buddies up with robot hating cop Scat Jalia. So we've got indestructible cyborg killing machines like Terminator and Universal Soldier not only discussing their mortality, but also indulging in a bit of pro-creation. I was hoping at this point the female cyborg would become pregnant for some extra brain damage but they just kind of forgot about all this very quickly.

Jack cranks up the robot racism but his heart melts when his cyborg buddy fixes his car, as you do. Then some other stuff happens that's also cool. And the main bad robot gets shot in the head but for some reason the bullet wound moves to the other side of his head for the last ten minutes of the film.

Totally derivative, low budget, and cheesy, T-Force is also awesome for trying to fit so much into an hour and a half. Loved it when they jumped in those buggies for a car chase.

Wouldn't it be nice if we lived in a world that had mastered the art of cyborg creation? We could have them serving us drinks and killing masked terrorists. That's essentially T-Force in a *ahem* box. In the not too distant future when Los Angeles law enforcement is unable to cope with high risk situations they call in T-Force. A group of elite cyborgs who were made specifically to deal with situations of deadly peril.

Unfortunately T-Force will do anything necessary to complete their mission within acceptable parameters including the death of hostages. Of course that's seen as unacceptable and the future of T-Force is all but sealed. They are to be dismantled, but wait - oops - it turns out they don't like the sound of that. So they escape and here enters Jack Scalia as the cop given the plum job of bringing them in a la Blade Runner.

What follows is the usual assortment of cheap action segments and an underlying question of morals. Are the cyborgs people? Do they deserve the same rights? Can cyborgs have babies? That sort of nonsense. Jack Scalia and director Richard Pepin team up for PM Entertainment. A production company notorious for dtv action titles and once again we find the same routine with Pepin bringing the movie in at a certain budget and Scalia turning in yet another burned out lone cop role.

T-Force isn't trying to fool anyone. It's a mindless low budget action flick that borrows upon ideas from other films. I don't see how you could be surprised nor left feeling cheated by T-Force. It has a fun moment or two, but you know it's not really worth your time.