Hard Men

This is a hopeless mistake of a film. The director has taken some elements of "Reservoir Dogs" and "Trainspotting", mixed them up with "Get Carter" and forgotten that all those films were reliant on real creative talent. This film is derivative, pointlessly violent, horribly unfunny and badly acted.

Kristian's comparison to A Clockwork Orange is spot on. This film has far more in common with that than anything Tarantino has done. I'm guessing J K Amalou worships that film because Hard Men (without stealing ideas as some have suggested) is like an impish little brother for the original. Like A Clockwork Orange, it portrays another, detached reality, far away from the bubble world of middleclass complacency and boredom. In this world everyone is messed-up, hostile, alone and paranoic. Like Alex and his droogs, Tone and co wreak havoc on the seedy, corrupt, rotting world around them with sadistic glee. The cartoon style of the violence puts us surely in the realm of the surreal, and the bizarre and colourful costumes fuse retro influences with 90s night life in London. This lends the whole thing a feeling of timelessness. Like A Clockwork Orange, it will probably age well.

The characterisation is good and the acting is great. Vincent Regan portrays Tone with a sensitivity to the paradox of a man who squashes the city lowlife as if they were flies about to defecate on his dinner, but loves his little daughter so much that in one scene he actually glows. I challenge you to decide whether you like or despise this man. Lee Ross is wonderful as Speed, a coke-fuelled, buzzin, cotton-wool-for-brains, obnoxious teenager. He is amazingly irritating, and is clearly about to burn-out or explode with self-loathing. Ross Boatman puts in a solid performance as Bear. He is not as compelling as Regan or Ross, but his character does not have the emotional depth of Regan's, or the high caricature of Ross's.

The dreamlike quality of the film is also supported by some gorgeous cinematography. The bright cartoon colours of cheap clothes, city lights, and mugs in numerous cloned cafes are shocking against the drab, dirty buildings. There is a scene at a deserted docks; it is mesmerisingly beautiful...a perfect setting for the final resolution of events.

Admittedly, I do have the feeling this film has imbedded itself like a hatchet in my psyche, a not entirely pleasant sensation. But, if you're not into facile, candyfloss cinema, and you enjoyed the battering A Clockwork Orange and Fight Club gave you, then you're gonna love this!

"Hard men" never really made it and it's one of the greatest crimes in cinema as this movie made by Amalou (he only made 3 movies since now) is one of the rare pearls in today's British cinema. The violence of course refers to Tarantino, but so what?, hundreds of other movies did and it's absolutely funny. We follow the adventures of three maffiosi (their boss is the legendary Mad Frankie Fraser, played by himself) who earn "their" money. They do have their own techniques and as you can guess it's not exactly the most customer-friendly one. But once you're in the mob, there's no escape and one day one of the three becomes a father and want to become a family man he already wrote his testament. "Hard men" is a typical British movie that only will be understand by those who hate Mel Gibson-movies (the dialogue about whether Abba are good or not, is hilarious. Superb and one of the greatest I saw, plus tons better than overrated Tarantino-copies.

Back in the Fifties, many a movie seemed to require one or other of its characters to say: 'hey, let's put on a show!'. In what may have passed for the gestation of this film, someone, perhaps the writer / director, said: 'Hey, let's make a movie!' The result now is much the same as the result way back then, except that in those Fifties disasters the people on each side of the camera had a reasonable idea of what they were doing. No such luck here: if I'd had to sit through this as a graduation piece from young film makers, the most charitable verdict would've been that 'Hard Men' is to movie making what Jeffrey Archer is to English Literature. In other words, no connection.

The movie doesn't so much take to the screen as set up house in a cliche -- guns, shouting, more guns, more shouting, bad language, guns, bad language, guns. As reportage it's dismal. As fiction it's unsustainable. The acting is of a standard to make one wish to hand out Oscars to those responsible for 'Night of the Lepus' ('Attack of The Killer Rabbits') and the direction as consistent as a weathervane in a hurricane.

But that ol' Fifties magic lingers on, for a third of the way through the director finally loses the plot altogether and it's time for 'hey, let's put on a show!' -- whereupon one or other of the mass murderers turns to the camera and sings about his newborn baby.

Come back, Ed Wood. All is forgiven.

Rating: unrateable.

Badly dressed, rubbish brit gangster flick. There is a loopy young buck with different coloured specs to show what mood he is in. Ross "Pretty boy" Boatman is the big name in this, the film is bad. Its before he found hid true calling as a big money poker player. UNDERWORLD AUTHENTICITY is added by Mad Frankie Frazer, a good honest villain. I can't be bothered with the plot, i hate this film. I wanted to watch men in black but my mates got this instead.

Watch this film and then watch Rancid Aluminium, you will be amazed.