Unforgivable

This is more for Theo Robertson - but it can be for anyone with a similar viewpoint. Therapy CAN change an abusive person IF they decide they want to change. I am proof! I went into group therapy because I thought I had "a problem with my anger". I saw a lot of parallels between myself and Paul Hegstrom. I wasn't nearly as abusive, but I had the same type of characteristics, right up to the point of telling the counselor that I had "an anger problem", pretty much like Paul Hegstrom did. Just like he, himself, I learned that I had been taught that behavior, that's where it started. Knowing exactly what the problem was gave me a starting point to change it! Just like he did. The movie's excellent and I was blown away by John Ritter's portrayal. At first I didn't even believe it WAS him because I've never seen him play anything other than a humorous character. The movie's excellent!

Ritter, usually Hollywood's Mr. Niceguy, plays a holy terror in this tale of raging spousal abuse. Very effective film showing how a family can be torn apart for years by a lunatic who was created by the actions of his own father. Realistically played out, this picture could serve as the 'poster' movie for a problem which is apparently more pervasive than I had supposed. A definite must see.

A good film about an ugly subject: male-on-female domestic violence.

Here's some valuable back-story (not a spoiler): I've known Paul Hegstrom and his wife personally. According to them the film is an accurate portrayal of what an incredibly messed up man Paul Hegstrom was. Paul no longer *physically* beats his wife. However there are plenty of ways the physically abusive can continue the cycle of abuse without raising a hand. Anger issues and deep seated insecurities can be manifested in many ways than physically.

Another reviewer said, "I believe it was very courageous for the real life Paul Hegstrom to put himself out there and tell the world what he'd done. We all make mistakes, not many of us can admit it." Big assumption there. Paul Hegstrom has made a lot of money by promoting through his books and "counseling ministry" the stereotype that men are abusive and women are victims and that the inverse is rarely ever true; and where it is true the man must have done something to deserve it.

Take what good you can from this film, but don't presume that the central figure on which the film is based is a role model of genuine redemption. Unfortunately there are many physically abusive men (and although Hegstrom would deny it, women too) who overcome their physical abusiveness only to continue being equally abusive emotionally and psychologically. ALL forms of abuse are wrong and, unfortunately, this film may only perpetuate the stereotype that physical abuse is more evil than other abuses, and that only men are responsible for abuse.

Paul (John Ritter -- R.I.P.) is a nasty, cheating wife-beater who struggles to control his anger at home and at work. I won't re-cap the plot, instead I'll simply say this is an excellent TVM about domestic violence. It explores the reasons WHY men beat their wives/girlfriends and what can be done about it.

In a jaded, cynical world, this movie gives hope that some people CAN change and there's help out there if you need it -- all you have to do is ask.

The cast do a magnificent job in their respective roles and being a true story, there's a little epilogue at the end. I believe it was very courageous for the real life Paul Hegstrom to put himself out there and tell the world what he'd done. We all make mistakes, not many of us can admit it. A must see!

This movie shows from a true story Domestic Violence,Spouse Abuse and Battering and is truly "Unforgivable" in any family in America. A.R Simoun did a fantastic job writing this movie and letting it make it to the screen, without watering down the story like so many movies do. Many movies show the damage of physical violence, but few go into the Emotional Abuse, Threats, Economic Abuse, Intimidation, Isolation. The only negative of the movie is that it didn't go far enough at the end to show how the real Paul and Judy Hegstrom not only re-married and have been Violence-Free, and developed a program that gives Hope and Help to hurting families all over the world. A few years ago the Surgeon General classed domestic abuse as the leading cause of injuries to women ages 15-44, more common that auto accidents, muggings, rapes, and cancer deaths combined. Life Skills International was developed by Paul and Judy to help women and men who need help. This movie should be seen by every couple in our country, whether they are dating, living together, or married. Too many of our children are growing up in violent homes and we wonder why our society is so violent. But instead of dealing with the real issues, our society continues to blame Hollywood movies, video games and guns for the problems with violence. Please push TV stations all over our country to play this 1996 movie again and tell others to watch it. No segment of society is exempt from domestic violence. It knows no boundaries; neither religious, ethnic, or social. A****