Cuentos de ultratumba: Burdel de sangre

While I enjoyed the humor and the Crypt Keepers puns more in this than in Demon Knight, the overall experience of this is just slightly inferior. This one suffers mainly under not having such an entertaining villain/main monster as the first one; Lilith does have some decent lines, but almost all of them were sexual innuendos, which gets old a little too fast. The Collector was more entertaining, with his cynical and sarcastic personality. There's also less "action" in this one, though there might be slightly more gore. In this one, the plot also moves along a little too slowly, considering the fact that it's only meant as entertainment; with that in mind, you have to wonder why it takes so long to tell the story and get to the gore and blood. The ending sequence was also slightly less entertaining and exciting than the one in Demon Knight. Like Demon Knight, the film manages to bring in plenty of both sex and violence, often both at the same time. Apart from Rafe(Dennis Miller), there weren't really any interesting or entertaining characters. Miller does a really great job, portraying the type of character he usually does; a slimy, sarcastic jerk. That is the Miller that we fans know and love. It's nice to see him in a role that compliments his talents so well. The film, like Demon Knight, is very gory and violent, although apart from the Crypt Keepers puns, and some of Miller's lines, this didn't have that much to offer. It's good enough to watch, if you've got 90 minutes to kill, and you don't want to see Demon Knight, don't want to re-watch it, or can't find it. The films are both worth watching, but I'd suggest Demon Knight over this one. I recommend it(like the first) to fans of gory horror films, and people who just want to be entertained for 90 minutes without having to think very much. 6/10

I don't have much of an opinion on this flick. Because what's there to analyze? Gratuitous violence. Gratuitous gore. Gross-out effects strictly for shock value. Gratuitous nudity and close-ups of big breasts. What we have here is a feminist's nightmare. What we also have is an absolute blast!!!

I'm sure women won't enjoy this as much and will probably b*tch about the overdose of female nudity, but for all you guys who just don't give a damn and just want to kick back and have a good time: You will love this movie!! This is like a mix of Wes Craven and Howard Stern. A supreme guilty pleasure!

I enjoy deep, artistically brilliant films like "American Beauty" and "Magnolia," but there's no reason I can't enjoy a campy, shallow, sleazy horror flick like this. I don't ONLY enjoy these types of flicks, but I can enjoy it as long as it's done in a fun, tongue-in-cheek, unpretentious manner. I just want to get that straight. OK, I'll go on. :)

Dennis Miller provides great comic relief in his lead role. Those who are fans of his schtick should look forward to this movie. The horror sequences, though sometimes cheesy, are great fun to watch. There's a spectacular sequence at the end with excellent usage of the song "Ballroom Blitz." There are other great classics like "All Right Now" and "Jailbreak." That's why I bought the soundtrack. It's awesome!

So this movie fits the "guy flick" stereotype like a glove. If you're not in the mood for excessive violence, gore and female nudity--don't watch this movie! Don't say I didn't warn you.

My score: 7 (out of 10)

Blood, breasts, vampires and Chris Sarandon. How can you go wrong?

"Bordello of Blood," the second "Tales From The Crypt" feature film, supplies the viewer with ample amounts of all of the above, leaving room for little else. What it lacks in story, it more than makes up for in its cheap thrills, and as far as midnight guilty pleasures go, this one is about as good as it gets.

The story revolves around a good-girl (Erika Eleniak) whose delinquent brother (Corey Feldman) goes missing. Upon hiring a wise-cracking private detective, it is revealed that a local morgue is housing a brothel run by a gang of beautiful but deadly vampires. Armed with super-soakers full of holy water and with the help of a guitar-slinging reverend (Chris Sarandon), the two set out to put the joint out of business once and for all.

Dennis Miller is essentially playing himself, but keeps the humor pumping through the film's ridiculous premise. Chris Sarandon, likewise, is in top form as the genre hero he truly is. As mentioned before, there's plenty of bare-flesh and red-stuff to go around, and if that sort of thing is your bag, you'll have a blast with "Bordello of Blood." Take it for the cheap thrill ride it is.

Private eye Rafe Guttman (Dennis Miller) is hired by Katherine Verdoux (Erika Eleniak) to find her missing brother Caleb (Corey Feldman). Rafe's search leads him to a brothel run by centuries-old vampire Lilith (Angie Everhart). The second of the 'Tales from the Crypt Presents' movies is nowhere near as good as the criminally underrated Demon Knight. It's not a scary movie, nor does it really try to be. It's a comedy, with Dennis Miller having a ball throwing out one liner after one liner. If only the rest of the movie matched his performance. The story is so slight you'll wonder if the entire script was jotted down on a napkin. The movie's primary selling point is sex and nudity, of which there is not a lot. Especially disappointing when you consider that the two most well-known women in the film, Everhart and Eleniak, never appear nude. Still, a fun tone with a great turn by Miller makes it worth watching once.

Dennis Miller tries to stop a group of female bi-sexual vampires (led by the ultra-erotic Angie Everhart) who pose as prostitutes at a funeral home that acts as a front for a supposed prostitution ring. By the way, I am completely serious. "Bordello of Blood" is a crazed mess that is so hilarious because of its stupidity that it nearly becomes a deceptive winner. This is the second film of the mid-1990s from "The Tales From the Crypt" HBO series (the equally under-achieving "Demon Knight" was released in 1995). I personally like this picture a little more because it does not take itself too seriously and almost works better as a parody. However the film never rises from its very odd premise as its tone is unclear and the immensely funny situations are sometimes over-shadowed by very graphic violence and constant sexual situations. Arguably Miller's finest performance (go figure that one too) and the steamy vampires are not quite enough to keep "Bordello of Blood" from needing a shot for its STDs (Seriously Tedious Dilemmas). 2 stars out of 5.