Phat Beach

Watching this movie was the biggest waste of time and 2 bucks for rental in my life. If nothing catastrophic happens before I die, this will be the biggest regret of my life. Who ever even thought about this movie, or financed deserves a kick between the legs, because that's where they were thinking when they made this movie. It's about an overweight guy who is a hopeless romantic, and writes pretentious drivel that tries to pass off as poetry. He joins his amorous friend in a trip to the coast. Where they meet girls and such. Only the fat guy doesn't get a girl. Skin flicks don't annoy me, I take 'em for face value. But this movie tries to be more than a skin flick. It's about Fat guy looking for love in some girl, but then meets another bikini silicone girl that enjoys his poetry. He finds his talent for volleyball which gets money for his family and impresses the ladies, only he has his lady anyways. The dialogue is super-horrible for even a C movie. It supports a ton of black stereotypes, no character development, it's a glorified porno movie, without any porn in it. Never ever watch this movie.

This is the epic tale of a overweight young man and his player buddy Darnell's trip to the beach, the Phat Beach! The fat boy steals his father's Benz and off they go, with visions of fat booties in their heads. Once they get there, Darnell is getting mo' booty than a bike seat and the fat man (whose name I can't remember, else I'd use it, I'm not trying to offend the overweight here) keeps getting rejected. He sees his dream girl and chases her as best as he can, but she is cruel to him. The film then begins to get pretty depressing with the fat man wandering around alone while Darnell keeps getting them ladies. There is something I like about this movie, and I honestly don't know what it is. Nothing really happens in it, it isn't very funny, there is little to no nudity, Coolio is in it for about three seconds, but I am always drawn back to it. About once a year I get a craving for Phat Beach. It takes all kinds, I guess. In Phat Beach related news: I gave this DVD to a friend for his birthday. His house was broken into on my birthday and a bunch of stuff was stolen, including this DVD. Bizarre.

Many people don't like this movie. To me, it's a classic. Sure, it spawned from the West Coast, and as we all know, everything comes from the West to the East, but this movie is an exception. Nineteen Ninety Six; the year Antichrist Superstar came out. Even though this is a very funny movie and some lines from it will be repeated for years, the wardrobe and music seems to be at least four years behind the original release date. At first viewing, you would think this film was released in 1991 or 1992 considering all the music and styles, but turn the DVD case over and you'll see 1996. I think this is the only exception that the East Coast was WAY ahead of the West Coast.

Overall, a hilarious movie with lines you will repeat over and over again.

"Phat Beach" is a lighthearted, playful film that embodies the spirit of 90s humor. With a runtime of 1 hour 29 minutes, this R-rated comedy manages to pack in a decent amount of laughs and entertainment. The movie's strongest aspect is its nostalgic value, with plenty of classic 90s references and humor that will have you chuckling.

One of the highlights of the film is the guest appearance by Coolio, which adds a touch of coolness to the already fun vibe. The cast's chemistry and energy are infectious, making it easy to get caught up in the movie's carefree atmosphere.

While "Phat Beach" may not be a groundbreaking or deeply meaningful film, it's a solid choice for those looking for a lighthearted, fun watch. If you're in the mood for some 90s nostalgia and a playful comedy, this movie is definitely worth checking out.

Jermaine Hopkins wants to spend his summer taking a writing course. His father insists he get a job at the local burger joint. His friend, Brian Hooks, talks him into quitting his job, taking his father's car and driving down to Los Angeles in search of women.

If you're looking for a well produced movie about a hapless dolt confronted with an unending series of stupid, underdressed, overendowed young women and stupid, obnoxious men, who triumphs because of a magically unreturnable volleyball serve, this is the movie for you. Add in what was clearly intended to be funny situations, but which will make you cringe into fetal position if you have any empathy at all, and you have this movie.

Clearly this was intended to be some sort of Ferris Bueller-gone-wrong movie. However the only thing that goes wrong is the movie, from beginning to end.