Chrome Hearts

Chopper Chicks in Zombietown...the title pretty much tells the story itself. We've got motorcycle babes, townsfolk, a busload of blind orphans, and a dwarf all fighting zombies in a run-down mining town. It's utter ridiculousness. But it's utter ridiculousness starring Billy Bob Thornton, Don Calfa, Lewis Arquette, and Howard the Duck himself, Ed Gale. That's a great cast for a goofy B-movie. I can't believe Billy Bob is in this, but then again, you gotta start somewhere. We aren't dealing with genius material here, but what do you expect from a Troma flick. You expect numerous silly gags which usually aren't funny, gratuitous nudity, and gore. You will get all of this, but there is a strange lack of nudity (except on Calfa's part). And with this title it's just expected. The movie didn't quite live up to my expectations (Joe Bob Briggs recommended it and he's never steered me wrong until now) but it's growing on me. Actually, I think I'm forcing myself to like it to justify the thirteen dollars I spent on the DVD. If you like your flesh-eating films serious, then stay away. If you're more into over-the-top humor and horror, you should probably still avoid it.

Note to genre buffs: I came to the same conclusion of an earlier reviewer that this film is a comedic combination of O'Bannon's Dead and Buried and Hammer's Plague of the Zombies.

GET THE HELL OUTTA THERE!

IF you don't then you are either going to be killed by:

A. Lesbian bikers B. Flesh eating zombies C. A bus-load of blind orphans!

This movie says something that I've been saying for a long time, there simply aren't enough movies about a gang of gay bikers (bikettes?) who have to attack a load of Zombies who could possibly threaten a whole town, not to mention the busload of blind orphans.

If you liked TROMA'S other masterpieces such as TROMEO AND JULIET, or THE TOXIC AVENGER, this may be more to your tastes. Obviously, if you liked this movie then you should check out the other two that I just mentioned.

It's funny, if you can watch it in the right spirit.

The Cycle Sluts roll into a small town to stop and get refuelled before hitting the road. Not only do they find that one of their number has a husband in the town (and was a home-coming queen in her day) but they also find that something is going on in the mine. A man has discovered valuable radioactive material in the mine and has been using zombies to harvest it. However when the zombies escape the Cycle Sluts might be the only ones able to stop them.

I didn't know anything about this film when I taped it. To be honest I was drawn to the title as much as anything else. I didn't expect a great deal from it, but my heart still sank a little when I saw it was a Troma flick. I have never seen a film from this stable that has risen above the low standards that have become synonymous with them. From the cheap, nasty opening credits through to the rubbish special effects and laughable `undead' this film is trash in every sense.

Sadly it hasn't got the sense to really send itself up in the way enjoyable trash usually will. Instead it just seems to wallow in it's own low standards with no desire to actually improve any part of it. The plot is meaningless and is made up of poor gore, no scares and no meaningful themes at all. Add to this a really cheap look, direction so poor that `lack of direction' is not so much a criticism as an aspiration and a total product that cries out to be labelled `banged out'.

Against all this, the acting of the leads isn't awful – they look good in comparison! The `chopper chicks' themselves are actually pretty cool and mostly pretty sexy/good looking – Gretchen Palmer being the cutest and most fresh faced (definitely not a woman who has ridden a motor bike across America!). The zombies are a total laugh – just walking slowly with basic makeup and groaning. The most notably actor (but not for his performance) is Billy Bob Thornton, who must look back on this now and thank God that he has risen above this type of work.

Overall, anyone watching Troma films should be ready for the low standards and lack of spark that generally come with them. I was ready for something poor but even still I was caught off guard by just how poor the whole thing was. Worth watching if you've never seen a Troma film, but other than that it's not worth the bother and is about as sh*t as you'd expect.

This is the kind of film that televisions were designed for. Though the plot is a little slow at first, it soon begins moving at a comfortable pace. The plot is, well, 'minimilistic', and the zombies are hillarious, not least for the wonderous 'musac' that accompanys their movements round the town. The bicker chicks, are dealing with the zombies, the zombies are being zombie-like. Best watched after copious quantities of beer. A nice little moovie. I would recomend this moovie to anyone who wants to watch films of the living dead, zombies, vampires and the like. It won't fail to hit the spot.

Ok, this is not a movie for everyone. This is a B-Movie, which means low budget. However, I really enjoy movies like this. The actors aren't over paid for bad acting. It is kinda cheesey but that just adds to the flick. It will also give you something to laugh at! The Chopper Chicks are a riot and the doctor that creates the zombies is too funny! Like I said this is a B-Movie, if you don't like these types of movies you won't enjoy this one.