As a teen in the 1980's and someone prone to watching all sorts of b, c and z-grade movie junk, I was somewhat surprised when I came across this 1990 title recently. Surprised as in wondering how I could not have seen or even heard of this flick before. I mean, as the proud owner of Hot Dog The Movie and Ski School 1 AND 2 (not to mention all the Police Academy movies), it almost seemed like a cinematic misdemeanor that I hadn't seen Ski Patrol.
I suppose I should say that had I saw Ski Patrol back in 1990, doubtless I would have shaken my head in contempt at how dumb and inept Ski Patrol was. And I wouldn't have been incorrect in thinking so. Then again, when the biggest names in your movie are Ray Walston and Martin Mull - and even those two are barely in the movie for all of 15 minutes - expectations shouldn't be set particularly high.
Even by that diminished standard, Ski Patrol is very lacking in several of the key areas that constitute the archetypal 1980's wacky teen boner comedy and despite being released in 1990, Ski Patrol is VERY much along the lines of a 1980's wacky teen boner comedy...albeit an inept one.
Ski Patrol DOES establish the Snobs vs. Slobs/Unlikeable Winners vs. Lovable Losers scenario, so at least that box got checked off. The problem lies squarely with the casting, in that the cast is chock full of non-charismatic, unfunny, amateurish actors doing non-memorable, unfunny things. It's just one of those deals with a comedy where if the comedy falls flat the movie falls flat. By that score, Ski Patrol is the equivalent of a can of soda opened and left sitting on a counter for several hours. A lot of second- and third-rate sight gags and scenarios that perhaps a kid of 6 years old would find mildly amusing. Which, I suppose is in keeping with the PG rating. Yep, Ski Patrol is rated PG. Now, why a movie is clearly trying to be a wacky teen boner comedy yet also attain a PG rating is a mystery to me. Not even a PG-13 with a brief glimpse of some side boob. Nope. A single 10 second shot of a couple of girls in some not particularly skimpy bikinis is about all the sensuality this flick has to offer.
What I will say Ski Patrol DOES have are some great sequences of people doing advanced skiing. No, really. I found the skiing sequences well filmed and exciting to watch. So, there's that, I suppose.
Even with all that said, though, it'd be a bit too easy to beat up on this 35-year-old failed comedy too much. And Ski Patrol really doesn't deserve to be beat up on that much, either. It's just this non-offensive, unfunny movie...a bit of a rip-off in terms of sort of representing itself as something it wasn't re: the boner comedy angle - since it was neither funny nor revealing - but hardly a crime against humanity. Something clearly designed back then to churn out a quick buck in a few theaters, a few more quick bucks in the video rental stores then be duly forgotten.
