Deadly Prey

Mike Danton is an ex "military strong man" who has retired. One morning he is kidnapped by a mercenary-group who wants to use him for target practice. They let Danton escape through the woods, wearing nothing but his underwear so they can hunt him down and kill him. But they didn´t count on Danton to be...the DEADLY PREY. This movie made me laugh like crazy. It´s RAMBO meets SURVIVING THE GAME without a budget (or a script). The action is so badly edited and coordinated and the acting is terrible (especially Ted Prior as the pumped up Danton). Still it makes you laugh just as hard as any great comedy, though it is clearly not supposed to. I recommend it highly, for all the wrong reasons.

Fellow bad movie lovers, gather round my brethren for here there be a classic!

This is the story of evil Colonal Hogan who is utilising kidnapped innocent civilians as big game in order to train his bloodthirsty group of mercenaries. All is going fine in this cruel pursuit to until that is one day his men make the BIG mistake of kidnapping one Mike Danton who turns out to have been formally trained by Hogan and who furthermore makes Rambo look like a wimp!

Armed only with a pair of cut off shorts, his mightily muscled frame, his wits and a rather fetching mullet our man now proceeds to wipe out every single one of his hunters in a myriad of wild and wacky ways including breaking their backs against trees, impaling them with twigs(!) spearing them and setting them up in some decidedly grisly traps!

Highlights in this? Damn, so many to choose from but check out our hero's girlfriend for a start who must surely rank as one of the most outrageously stupid women in film history! After seeing her beloved knocked over the head and driven away at speed in a truck does she ring the police as any normal, intelligent person would do? No, she instead rings her dad! OK so he was an ex police officer but really! To be fair her father doesn't seem much brighter either! Does he get back up? No, he goes to the military training camp all on his own!!! In fact this film is absolutely riddled with such daft plot contrivances as to render one utterly speechless! Take for instance the fact that whenever our man kills one of the bad guys he never picks up their guns(?!?!?!?) Oh well, he was so damn macho I suppose he didn't feel he needed them until the end!

Back to cool scenes again now though and you'll simply marvel at a plethora of utterly terrible fight choreography, a Styrofoam boulder attack(!), a thoroughly appetising scene of delicious worm chomping(!) our man hiding up a tree with no foliage about three feet above his pursuers and them not spotting him (this dumbfoundingly daft scene just has to be seen to be believed!) and my very favourite bit at the end when our hero slices off an opponents arm with his machete before beating the guy to death with his own severed limb!!! To top it all off our man then scalps him!!!

Simply ridiculous stuff and all the more hilarious for it!!! If you have any shred of self respect then you simply must get hold of this film by any means possible!

Beefcake "actor" Ted Prior (brother of writer & director David A. Prior) stars as Mike Danton, a former Marine, in this B level gem. It's about as far as you can get from high art, with a whole lot of completely inept action sequences and hilariously lame performances. Obviously owing a heavy debt to that familiar old plot of "The Most Dangerous Game", it's also clearly inspired by "First Blood" and its sequels, as well as "Commando".

Colonel John Hogan (David Campbell) leads a group of mercenaries. They're hired for a gig by an unscrupulous "businessman" named Michaelson (Troy Donahue). The thing about these guys, though, is that they like to have thorough training sessions before the actual missions. So they abduct guys like Mike, and chase them through the California woods. But they've made an extremely dumb move in selecting Mike this time around, and he's going to give them what-for in a major way.

Top billed Cameron Mitchell, who plays a former cop and the father to Mikes' wife Jaimy (Suzanne Tara), is very much just here for his name value. He has little to add to the plot. Instead, the action focuses on the studly Ted P., who for much of the running time darts around in short shorts. Ted may not be Olivier, but his emoting near the end still needs to be seen to be believed. Campbell is amusing as the money hungry villain, as is Fritz Matthews as Lieutenant Thornton, his main henchman.

"Deadly Prey" can boast a steady supply of violence and a respectably high body count, but it might not be gory enough to suit some tastes.

The absolute best moment of this epic occurs between Mike and Thornton. You'll know it when you see it, and may howl with appreciative laughter.

"Deadly Prey" is deliciously daft nonsense, with an ultra corny theme song to serve as perfect accompaniment.

Seven out of 10.

Wow, this an oddity, make no mistake about it. It's typical: One minute you're at your house with your lovely lady wife taking the trash outside, next you're knocked senseless by a pipe to the back of your skull. Before you know it, you're being forced to run topless and shoeless through a forest pursued by a bunch of mercenaries in a private army who are using you as training practise. Fortunately, you're more resilient than most, being an ex-military guy yourself and in an elite faction, at that. So, with your 80's blonde mullet and your abs the size of Canada, you decide to turn the tables on your pursuers by setting up all kinds of homemade traps that anyone who hasn't seen Rambo would fall into. Will you ever get out of there alive? Can you find the person responsible for your kidnap and beat seven bells out of the scumbag? And is there a way to make worms and rats over a campfire taste any better? All will be revealed (Well apart from the last one perhaps..)

Where do I start with a movie as bizarre as this? What could have been a run of the mill action film, is transformed into something else entirely thanks to the increasingly strange proceedings. Considering these are supposed to be trained soldiers, don't they get dragged into bushes and stumble over tripwires rather easily? And why the hell is the Commander sending his men to their deaths for the sake of catching just one guy? Also, what is the point in the role of the ex-police chief father-in-law of the hero? I could also bring up the unlimited supply of bullets, and the hilariously fake explosions, but that isn't what caught my attention.

No, what I want to talk about is the ending, which features much sadism and has more than one surprise death. This sudden bloodshed is combined with a wholly inappropriate love song over the credits, which makes it a very surreal experience indeed. In fact, there is almost enough weirdness here for it to qualify as a parody, if it didn't take itself so seriously.

However, in spite of all that it manages to entertain despite itself by giving us lots of juicy scenes of shootings and maimings. The death toll is extremely high too, so expect non-stop action involving everything from knives to missile-launchers. When it had finished, I didn't feel I had wasted my time, and even admired it in a way for concluding in such an uncompromising and unpredictable fashion. 5/10 from me, and certainly worth seeing..

Since there were a fair amount of cost-cutter Rambo rip-offs, finding the ripest one isn't as easy as it would seem, but no doubt DEADLY PREY is a prime choice. It's a one-man-army saga made on the ranch in L.A., with mini muscle-dude, Ted Prior, stripped to his cutoffs and hunted for sport by a bunch of p***ed-off militia dudes. As misguided and inept a macho potboiler as one could imagine. Give me librium or give me meth!!!