Supernaturales

I am a huge fan of zombie movies, so, when I found this one, I jumped to the chance of renting it. And then I knew I made a bad choice.

The movie is about a group of army recruits being led into the backwoods by their head sergeant, Uhura from Star Trek. And I'll be damned if this wasn't another sequel to those Police Academy movies or something. From that marching band music, to goofy acting, to constant joking, and so on, I was really thinking this was like the 8th sequel, "Assignment in Alabama" or something. And that wasn't a good sign.

Eventually, some "supernatural" stuff starts to happen, relating back to some flashback of a kid walking through a minefield with all these Confederate soldiers, only to have all of them blown away, except for him. A very cheesy scene. There's this woman the group finds, and apparently, they have no questioning as to who she really is, or what she's doing there. She's just with them now.

I was starting to fall asleep until finally some guy got killed by two zombies in an underground bunker. Then there's that, "We've found a body, now let's find the killer" scheme until finally, that night, there is...yes...a shoot-out between zombies--which we barely ever see--and the recruits, who are getting killed left and right. But it's no bloodbath.

There's a lot of scenes with this one guy and the zombies, while Uhura and some other chick hide behind rocks with a few other survivors and shoot at zombies. It was all really lame, until the terrible ending that had nothing resembling a climax. And then it ended. We saw an equivalent of ten zombies in the whole movie, uninteresting deaths, and basically no horror. Skip this one. It's not only a bad zombie movie, it's a bad horror movie in total.

I remember seeing this one as a kid but failed to remember much else from it. Now I know why: Not much happens in it. The only few merits it has, are the neat ghost story concept (Return of the Civil War Zombies) and some commendable attempts at creating atmosphere (mainly with the use of lighting and fog). Too bad the rest of the film is a dud. It's like it wants to, but can't, really.

The zombies appear to have cool make-up effects, but it's hard to tell because you hardly get a good look at them. It sort of plays out like a supernatural slasher movie in the woods. The teenagers here are simply replaced with a bunch of military soldiers in training (or something). Either way, they all still act like teenage boy-scouts. A lot of them do get killed, but never in exuberant ways. THE SUPERNATURALS might still be worth a watch if you fancy this type of typical 80's stuff, but make sure to lower your expectations.

I really wanted to like this film a bit more, this second time around. But it just remains a flawed movie. If it would have had at least a slightly higher pace and a bit more memorable death-scenes, I would have been more forgiving. Now, I'm just very sorry.

THE SUPERNATURALS stars Nichelle Nichols as Sgt. Leona Hawkins, who leads some young recruits into the deep woods on maneuvers. While setting up camp, an underground bunker is discovered. Cue the ominous atmosphere.

TWO FACTS BECOME CLEAR RIGHT AWAY: #1- Something very strange is going on. #2- The majority of Sgt. Hawkins' "soldiers" just may be the most annoying, infantile bunch of bananas to ever take up arms! The Sergeant would have her hands full with this mob under any circumstances, let alone in a supernatural situation!

Once night falls, hope arises as the herd is thinned. Cue the shambling, moldering ghouls.

This all ties in with a prologue about a terrible event that took place long ago, on the very spot where these troops are. What are the odds?

Part ghost story, part zombie movie, and part survival horror, Ms. Nichols is the one true bright spot in an otherwise so-so production.

Co-stars LeVar Burton and Scott Jacoby as the two least irritating members of the Sgt's unit...

The Supernaturals is pure 80's cheese. It's corny, has terrible acting, and is full of stereotypes (the nerd, the black guy with the radio, and the horny white guy for starters). So why then do I like this movie? Is it because of the Star Trek alumni (Uhura and La Forge), the best Abraham Lincoln impersonator I've ever seen, or LeVar Burton's sinister mustache? None of the above. It's because The Supernaturals is one of those movies from my childhood. I saw it years ago and it just grows on you. It's extremely cheesy, but likable. It's a non-traditional zombie/ghost story and that alone should make zombie fans want to see it. There is a lack of gore, however, the zombies look cool, when visible. Actually I don't know why this movie is rated R. Maxwell Caulfield is always great too. He is a fine example of wasted B movie talent. The Supernaturals is worth at least one viewing.

Nichelle Nichols stars as a drill sergeant who takes some young army cadets to an isolated forest to do some training, but they run afoul of several ghosts / zombies from the Civil War. Some are good, but most of them are seeking revenge for having to walk on fields with land mines at gunpoint. A good cast is wasted in this slow moving, dull flick with poor zombie effects.

Rated R; Violence, Profanity, and a Mild Sexual Situation.