The Adventures of Ford Fairlane

This movie always cracks me up. I should note that I'm SO not a fan of Andrew "Dice" Clay, I think his stand-up shows suck, big time. But here, he's simply fantastic as Ford Fairlane, the Rock'n Roll Detective, who mostly gets paid in the form of gifts or memorabilia.

Dice's jokes here work perfectly each time, one quotable line after another ("so many assholes, so few bullets", "you're a poet and didn't know it", "talking with Zuzu is like ************ with a cheese-grinder, slightly enjoyable but mostly painful" to name a few). The film never takes itself seriously, yet somehow keeps it from ever going into slapstick territory.

Supporting actors do well also, Presly is always a stunner, Wayne Newton gives his best ever performance as Fairlane's nemesis and Ed O'Neill is a riot as a former disco singer turned detective. Robert Englund gives a rather amusing performance as a very inept crook who's ultimate fate is nothing short of hilarious.

Finnish director Harlin directs with a sure hand, everything in the technical department in tip top shape and it's very visually stylish at times. The Adventures of Ford Fairlane is definitely not for everyone, but it's not only for die hard Clay fans, since I sure as hell ain't one of them. But I think he's perfect here and the film is very funny and comes highly recommended by me.

Andrew Dice Clay, now THERE was a man who was ahead of his time, If he came a decade or two later he would have been heralded as the acting equivalent of say, Eminem.. You know except with talent. OOOOH! Hey is this thing on?? Anyways this movie is greatness & one of my "guilty pleasures". So many quotable lines. So many great cameos. I heard Roger Ebert HATED this movie..yeah Ebert, I F#%^ed him OOOOH!! Seriously go see this movie... NOW, snapperhead.

My Grade: B+

DVD Extras: featurette; Billy Idol music video; theatrical trailer

The title of my post says it all for the ratings this movie received. I mean less than a 5?? This movie is in the cult classic section in every video store I go to! Sure this movie was harsh and witty while poking fun at the music industry of the late 80s/early 90s. And for those of you familiar with the late 80s/early 90s music scene, you'll remember how chaotic it was back then! This movie is a testament to all the decadent happenings during that time. Although filled with campy one-liners, an all-star cast, and extremely vulgar material, it's a Dice movie after all! That's how it's supposed to be! Granted this movie is not for everyone, it's still fun to just sit there and laugh along with the movie's gags. Offensive maybe, cheesy maybe. Get over it ya wimp!

Was this going to win Best Picture? Hell no.

But "Adventures of Ford Fairlane" is the movie you watch when you're about to go to sleep because you have a big meeting in the morning and then you see the opening credits on HBO at 11:30pm and you just have to watch it.

Movies like this, as self-serving and gross as they are, actually are more important today more than they were when they came out in the 80s and 90s. They are a reminder of a time when we could laugh at something that was gross and disgusting without having to worry about protests from leftist screaming about micro aggressions. No one names their penis "Stanley" anymore. No one is banned from MTV. No one says nursery rhymes with the word pu$$y in them.

No one knew it at the time, but AFF is an important snapshot of a better time in pop culture.

Ford Fairlane (Andrew Dice Clay) is known as the Rock n' Roll Detective. He's a hard-smoking, womanizing, Hollywood private eye who is well connected in the music scene. Jazz (Lauren Holly) is his loyal assistant. Everybody pays him in gifts. Lead singer Bobby Black and his band is supposed to be the new sensation. He ODs on stage during a performance. His school friend obnoxious shock-jock Johnny Crunch hires him to find his daughter-sister-daughter Zuzu Petals. Crunch is quickly killed. Investigating cop Lt. Amos (Ed O'Neill) has an old grudge against him. The Kid hires him to find his dad. Colleen Sutton hires him to find her sister Zuzu Petals. Zuzu turns out to be a groupie to Bobby Black. There's a crazed hit-man (Robert Englund) and record executive Julian Grendel (Wayne Newton).

It's crass, it's loud, and it's irreverent. I can certainly see many being offended by Andrew Dice Clay's crude character. For me, it's funny. It's basically an alternate world where Andrew Dice Clay's alter-ego exists. He's actually funnier when he's being a little stupid. There're some fun back-and-forth with Zuzu. For people not easily offended, this is good crass irreverent fun.