Mac, mi amigo de las estrellas

I know it's a little silly to write a review of a film 15 years after its release. But this poorly done film made its way onto one of my cable movie channels last night, and I feel the need to have a violent, outward reaction outside of the projectile vomiting I experienced.

People, this film is bad. Really bad. Bad like "Showgirls" bad, where it's so bad, it's both insulting and laughable simultaneously. And forgive me, but anybody who finds this 95-minute commercial for McDonalds and Coca-Cola to be warm-hearted or well done in any way knows not a thing about what makes a movie good, and needs a great deal of emotional counseling.

First, let's reiterate that point about this being an extended commercial. Folks, it is. The product placement in this film is shameless.

Next, there are basic things that make a film "good," like strong acting, a well-written script, superior camerawork or quality special effects. "Mac and Me" has none of these. Wooden posts would have made for better actors. The script clunks and thuds with every ridiculous, uninspired line. And the alien creatures of the film, with their bug-eyes and protruding bellies, look about a life-like as melted candles.

I also have to make a point of just how much of a rip-off of "E.T." this film was. Not only is the plot just a poor carbon copy, but even the title of this attrocity becomes an act of thievery when it's revealed that "Mac" stands for "Mysterious Alien Creature." I'm not even the biggest fan of uber-cutesy "E.T." either, but at least there the attempts at manipulation are somewhat subtle. Here, the filmmakers fell just short of subtitles at the bottom of the screen that said "LAUGH HERE" and/or "CRY NOW."

And the cherry atop Stewart Rafill's bile sundae? The scene inside a McDonald's (Our aforementioned sponsor) when normal, everyday patrons suddenly and spontaneously spring to life into a choreographed dance sequence. Yeh, that happens at the Greasy Mac's on Route 1 near my house every freakin' day.

Saps only will buy into laughable hunk of junk... for the rest of you out there, I recommend this movie only if you're looking for new additions to your Ten Worst List.

Mystery science theater 3000 just riffed this movie. If that doesn't tell you everything you need to know, I don't know what will.

If nothing else, MAC AND ME sorts out the really worthwhile people on this planet - those who can "see" decency and believe in solid family values as opposed to the viewers who were never really children - just young insensitives on their way to becoming hard-line realists and empty vessels. As one observant person commented, this film is nothing like ET yet still, without the benefit of a Spielberg direction or a budget of gynormous dollar-value, it succeeds in being heartwarming and a magical experience for children. My own kids grew up with this little film and having found it covered in dust in the garage last week (an old BETA copy) they all nestled up on the lounge together yesterday and watched it again. They were just as mesmerised and captivated as they had been in 1989 when they were just 9, 7 5 and 3. It was a rare moment of emotional beauty to see them re-capturing their childhoods. You wanna tell THEM about the blatant product placement, the "laughable aliens," the cornball script etc.

I don't THINK so!!!!

Awe man i love this movie, i remember going to my friends house just to watch it, when we were little. Yes i know it is a little cheesy, but so is other stuff, and movies. I think people should give this film more credit, it was good for it's time, still it isnt ET, but it is good in it's own way. And the guy who played Michael was HOT!!!!!!!

The dance party scene was such subtle product placement. I can't say why exactly, but for some reason I was left craving a Big Mac after watching the movie. Hmmm....

If anyone can watch the dance scene and tell me exactly why it was in the movie, I would love to hear it. Also perplexing were the jogging scene with musical score (even Phil Collins at his worst would have been an improvement) and the cameo by that annoying red-headed kid from 'Different Strokes'. Perhaps someone who has watched the movie repeatedly and considers it a cult favorite could enlighten us....?

I do like the fact that the producers cast a kid in a wheelchair as the star, but the writing was awful and the plot was laughably bad. It was an ET knock-off right up to the end, where you will find a shocking conclusion rivaled only by "The Usual Suspects"!