Gladiadores del año 2020 en Texas

I found Texas Gladiators (the english version) to be an excellent source of entertainment, but only because it was a piece of purile rubbish. The fact it was made in 1982 only heightens my abhoration of the costumes, which if the words "typical 80's bad guy" do not sum up I don't know what does.

From big things like the absence of a script and/or plot to the little things like labeling a 44-gallon drum with the word "DINAMITE", this film (if we can call it such) made me glad one of my friends paid the rental fee.

Luckily we rented this video in the frame of mind of looking for the worst movie we could find, and I believe we attained that goal in renting Texas Gladiators.

2020 Texas Gladiators (1982)

** (out of 4)

A post-apocalyptic Texas is the setting for this Joe D'Amato film, which has a group of good guys (led by Al Cliver) going through and cleaning up the rougher parts of the city. One of their members, a real nut case, decides to try and rape a woman so he is beaten and kicked out of the group. Sure enough, he forms his own bad guy group and soon he's attacking our good people.

I'm purposely using lame terms like "good guys" and "bad guys" because the film is pretty darn simple like that. There's really not too much of a plot but I'm sure you already know that and especially if you're familiar with these Italian MAD MAX wannabe films. This here is yet another film like that but I must say that I think John Carpenter's ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK had an influence on many films from this genre, including this one.

D'Amato, Cliver and several of the crew members also did ENDGAME, another post-apocalyptic film an that one there is slightly better but this one here has a few good things going for it. The highlight of the film are obviously the various action scenes, which certainly show their low-budget nature but at the same time the scenes are at least fun and there are a couple nice kills throughout including one man who gets his chest pretty much brutally attacked. There's even a scene where a nun cuts her throat (twice!?!) to try and avoid the bad guys attacking her.

Performances are pretty much what you'd expect out of a film like this but when is Cliver (ZOMBIE) not worth watching? He makes for a good lead and certainly helps keep you entertained in what you're watching. As you'd expect, all of the women are quite beautiful so that's always a major plus.

2020 Texas GLADIATORS isn't a film that's going to win any major awards but it's certainly entertaining enough to make it worth watching if you're a fan of D'Amato or the genre.

Yes you heard right! One UPS Delivery Truck ...full of neo Nazis led by the "black one" (or as I like to call him "the bald one").

After an "atomic war" was shattered civilization, rouge gangs of bikers, green mutants and one brown UPS Delivery truck full of neo Nazis aim to take over the world... well not exactly the world, just the state of Texas. It is a good thing Dubya hasn't seen this movie, or he might declare war on the UPS corporation for harboring neo Nazis terrorists in their delivery vans! This movie is simply unimaginable! How any of the actors kept a straight face during filming is beyond me! Most everything in the previous comments about this movie's plot is accurate and there isn't much I can add. The plot, if there is one, is void of anything - other than the countless rape scenes (that left me sick to my stomach), a lot of cheesy gun battles and the "black one's" sinister laugh is to die for! Even more funny is how the lowly Texians are trapped in their makeshift fort fending off a highly trained army...kinda reminded me of the Alamo Battle! And don't forget the brilliant portray of the American Indian, priceless ...or maybe not.

What is even more ironic about this movie is how violent it is! When I was 13 years old - I rented this movie! Yes - I walked into a video store and rented the movie with no questions asked! I recently obtained a copy of the movie off Ebay.com - simply to add to my collection of Cold War/End of the World movies.

I rate this movie a 5 out of 10 ...only because the UPS Delivery like truck full of neo Nazis and the "black one's" sinister laugh will have you laughing your butt off until doomsday does us all in!

The first 10 minutes takes place over at least 5 years, but you wouldn't know that if you weren't paying attention. Which you don't really need to do, because this plot is all over the place. And by all over the place, I mean everywhere but in this movie.

If you are a fan of Italian post-apocalypse movies, this will be familiar. It's not a good as most of them; the stunts are okay, the vehicles are pretty tame, the action is mediocre, and the typical nudity is sub-par. Other than that, it's a good movie to have on while doing something else. No scene stands out, the acting is what you'd expect, and the soundtrack is forgettable.

But you still need to watch it if you're a fan on the genre.

Joe D'Amato, mostly known for his sleazy and downright nauseating horror flicks like "Buried Alive", "Anthropophagus" and "Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals", joins his contemporary Italian colleagues in making over- the-top cheesy and ridiculous post-nuclear Science Fiction movies! The trend started elsewhere, mostly with the Australian "Mad Max" and John Carpenter's "Escape from New York", but the Italians exploited the success of these films shamelessly and endlessly! Lucio Fulci had "The New Gladiators", Sergio Martino had "After the Fall of New York", Ruggero Deodato had "Atlantis Interceptors", Enzo G. Castellari had "The Bronx Warriors" and our good pal Joe D'Amato has both "Endgame" and this "2020 – The Texas Gladiators". It's a deliciously cheesy hodgepodge of semi-processed ideas and blatantly stolen sequences from other movies, and if you're a fan of this sort of trash, you're guaranteed to love it in spite of all the awfulness.

The movie starts, as to be expected, as a bunch of chaos! Texas is entirely destroyed by nuclear warfare and hoodlum gangs randomly run amok in the streets. Luckily there's a quintet of courageous beefcake warriors parading around to protect the weaklings. During a fight in a monastery (there's a nun who cuts her own throat … TWICE!), one of them is banished for trying to rape a girl and another one leaves voluntary to marry and live in a community that tries to rebuild civilization. The evil Nazi-inspired Black One violently invades this community, however, and makes a widow out of the warrior's wife. The tree remaining buddies pick up the girl in a sleazy bar and decide to help her in defeating Black One and his evil lieutenant, who's also an old acquaintance of them. Mind you, this is just a very brief and shortened plot description. There's a whole lot more going on in "2020 – Texas Gladiators". Too much to mention, actually, as there are authentic traditional Indians, enslaved mine workers, Russian roulette sequences that are stolen straight from "The Deer Hunter", Nazis with amours of steel and one tremendously cool Asian fighting expert!

Unless, of course, you have no idea what the early 80's Italian rip- off/exploitation business is all about, you simply cannot dislike "2020 – Texas Gladiators". Whilst slightly less outrageous and entertaining as "Endgame", this is another over-the-top flamboyant smörgåsbord of sleaze and violence. Donald O'Brien is fantastically stereotypical, in a totally deliberate fashion, and the battle sequences are hysterical. Imagine: hi-tech weapons can't perpetrate through the armor of the Nazi soldiers, but old-fashioned Indians with their primitive arrows and spears wipe them out in a matter of seconds! D'Amato's film is full of similar nonsense like this, and more. A real treat for demented exploitation dorks, like myself.