Zombie Island Massacre

Seriously do yourself a favour and learn from my mistake, just watch the trailer and skip the movie! Every interesting / good moment is in the trailer! This is an early Troma movie, and a bad one at that. Very little zombies, very little massacre and a bit of some island? It's super boring with a non existent plot, drab characters and nonsensical dialogue. There is some occasional nudity but that is not enough to save this movie. I spent 75% of this shopping on Amazon! The trailer is really good and is totally misleading in that it makes it out to be action packed, it is not, it's peoples conversing and wandering through the forest for an eternity! Skip it! Trust me!

Aside from a really stupid scene where black magic resurrects an island villager, there are NO ZOMBIES in this stupid movie! The "plot" is a rehash from a million other grade-Z thrillers, with bad actors walking around spouting nonsense dialogue, while a very bored audience waits for them to die. Correction: while a very bored audience waits for them to get EATEN BY ZOMBIES, which THEY DON'T! This isn't even a crappy "Dawn of the Dead" rip-off, it's nothing. A more appropriate title might have been "Boring People Massacre," or perhaps "Boring People on Island Where Nothing Happens".

This reminds me of two other really bad "zombie" movies where there were no zombies. "Revenge of the Living Dead," and "Virgin among the Living Dead," neither of which had any zombies whatsoever. When the title and poster art and description on the video box promise ZOMBIES, they should maybe HAVE ZOMBIES in the movie!

In any case, don't make the mistake I did. When and if you find this on your video shelf, DO NOT RENT IT!

In the early 1980s, Rita Jenrette posed for Playboy and exposed her Congressman husband as a swinger and created a scandal. She tried numerous ways to capitalize on her dubious fame, and one of them was this movie. The best part of this movie is the first ten minutes or so, when Rita is nude taking a bath and making love to her boyfriend.

Rita and her boyfriend go to the Carribean, and take a tourist trip to some voodoo island where they witness a voodoo ritual that is very lame compared to the one with James Bond in Live and Let Die. After the ritual, the various tourists who went there on an old school bus want to get back to their hotel, but the bus is broken down, and the driver is missing.

Meanwhile the Voodoo Priest and the tour guide are making some kind of voodoo pact that involves sacrificing the tourists in order to boost business. Throw in drug dealers and five million dollars in cash, and this movie is a lot more like an episode of MIAMI VICE than a horror movie. No zombies are in this movie.

This is the first Troma picture I have seen that is basically a serious horror movie. What I mean is they never get really goofy here. Unfortunately, this probably turned off all the Troma fans out there. Then the title probably got zombie lovers attention and when they see this movie has basically one zombie who is not really involved with the plot they get ticked off and give the movie a one. I had low expectations so that is why I gave it a five. I did not think it was really all that good, but I also did not think it was all that bad. It was a watchable horror movie on an island with a few good kills and an easily predicted plot twist or two. I got this in a pack with two other Troma movies "Blood Hook" and "Blades" and I enjoyed this one the most even though the other two have higher scores. Still I understand why it has such a low score, when you are all set to see a zombie movie and you are not given any you do tend to get angry. I will admit this one would have been better if there were zombies swarming all over the house they take shelter in, but since I read some stuff before I watched it I knew it was not going to be a zombie movie per se.

I saw "Zombie Island Massacre," because a friend of mine owned it. Her aunt is in that movie as "Barbie." We had to see it. So we checked it out, and I have to say, if you can look past a lot of cheese, it's a great movie.

A large group of tourists head off to an island in the Carribean, only to come across voodoo, disaster, and zombies! The zombies look more like natives of the island, though, but then think of it as a cannibal movie without the scenes of eating. Eventually, a surviving group makes it to a house, and they meet up with this old guy. There are some weird subplots, but ignore them if you like. Not too much gore at all, but a lot of fun. For acquired tastes.