Zombie Island Massacre

Seriously do yourself a favour and learn from my mistake, just watch the trailer and skip the movie! Every interesting / good moment is in the trailer! This is an early Troma movie, and a bad one at that. Very little zombies, very little massacre and a bit of some island? It's super boring with a non existent plot, drab characters and nonsensical dialogue. There is some occasional nudity but that is not enough to save this movie. I spent 75% of this shopping on Amazon! The trailer is really good and is totally misleading in that it makes it out to be action packed, it is not, it's peoples conversing and wandering through the forest for an eternity! Skip it! Trust me!

I saw "Zombie Island Massacre," because a friend of mine owned it. Her aunt is in that movie as "Barbie." We had to see it. So we checked it out, and I have to say, if you can look past a lot of cheese, it's a great movie.

A large group of tourists head off to an island in the Carribean, only to come across voodoo, disaster, and zombies! The zombies look more like natives of the island, though, but then think of it as a cannibal movie without the scenes of eating. Eventually, a surviving group makes it to a house, and they meet up with this old guy. There are some weird subplots, but ignore them if you like. Not too much gore at all, but a lot of fun. For acquired tastes.

Aside from a really stupid scene where black magic resurrects an island villager, there are NO ZOMBIES in this stupid movie! The "plot" is a rehash from a million other grade-Z thrillers, with bad actors walking around spouting nonsense dialogue, while a very bored audience waits for them to die. Correction: while a very bored audience waits for them to get EATEN BY ZOMBIES, which THEY DON'T! This isn't even a crappy "Dawn of the Dead" rip-off, it's nothing. A more appropriate title might have been "Boring People Massacre," or perhaps "Boring People on Island Where Nothing Happens".

This reminds me of two other really bad "zombie" movies where there were no zombies. "Revenge of the Living Dead," and "Virgin among the Living Dead," neither of which had any zombies whatsoever. When the title and poster art and description on the video box promise ZOMBIES, they should maybe HAVE ZOMBIES in the movie!

In any case, don't make the mistake I did. When and if you find this on your video shelf, DO NOT RENT IT!

Troma sells it as a "Zombie flick" but it's nothing else but a poor , ultra low budget slasher flick with minimal gore and predictable situations.

I feel weak when commenting about this because I'm a big Troma fan and I felt cheated. The only good thing about the movie is the mansion setting. It's dark and creepy and helped in some "important" situations in the movie.

Horror fans, this flick has ZERO zombies... it should've been involved in the witchcraft or voodoo category.

Please, don't waste your time or money on this. I doubt it will be aired because it'd be an insult to horror fans. I had the bad luck to watch it at midnight on USA NETWORK back in 1997 and since then I still feel angered when thinking about it.

2/10. Say NO to this.

I'm a big fan of TROMA, and I feel somewhat guilty for saying that this movie is horrible! Terrible acting, terrible plot, terrible f/x, terrible score, and terrible setting. I couldn't watch this movie entirely until a few years ago when USA NETWORK aired it. It's not scary, not gory, and it has no point!! I recommended only for DIE HARD SLASHERS that don't mind visual pain. There you go, if you watch this movie and look for something to save then you can say you are a truly die hard slasher. The thing to save here is that TROMA feeling,it's a low budget but it has its moments of weirdness and some funny lines.

1/10 -Burn it! Flush the ashes