Joysticks

I love eighties movies of all kinds, yet I have been neglecting the great eighties sex comedy for a while. I decided to finally catch up on some of them, and I figured JOYSTICKS wasn't a bad place to start.

The local video arcade is the greatest hot spot in town for the teens, but it's not too popular with the richest man in town. Can the manager's grandson (who runs the place, since his grandfather is out of town), his nerdy co-worker, and the arcade's gaming champion stop him from shutting it down for good?

Even if it's not the greatest, JOYSTICKS still manages to entertain despite itself. It's your stereotypical eighties comedy, with lots of sex jokes, boobs, and all the caricatures you'd expect to find (the fat guy, the nerd, the suave guy, the punk, etc.). This kind of familiarity gives JOYSTICKS a very comfortable feeling, like homemade cooking.

Fans of eighties nostalgia will have a lot to love as well, with a classic soundtrack filled with cheesy tunes (including a title song), as well as all (or at least most of) the arcade games you can remember. The film does have its funny parts, and they're funny in the "that's-so-stupid" kind of way.

However, for every funny part, there are at least two jokes that fall flat on their face. This leads to some groan-worthy moments where you wonder why they would even put a joke like that in the film. For one, there's the rich guy's daughter, who they try to make funny by making her voice squeaky and making every third word she says, "Like." There are also the bumbling nephews who go into the arcade incognito with one of them dressed in drag.

JOYSTICKS really isn't that great, but it provides for a fun night of late twentieth century nostalgia. I'm being really generous by awarding it a 7/10, but no one can deny how fun it is.

There are obviously better eighties comedies out there, but this one will still entertain in a C.H.U.D. II: BUD THE C.H.U.D. kind of way.

Joe Don Baker (along way from his Walking Tall glory days, he'd bounce back though) plays Joseph Rutter a father who is mad that his daughter is always hanging out at the local video arcade. He crusades to shut it down, but the management and the other local arcaders have something to say about that. Cue 'hijinks and misadventures' and gaming contests. This movie can and will trick you into thinking it's going to be a fun, if totally guilty pleasure, film at the beginning. The opening theme song is amazingly memorable in that '80's kitchy kind of way that you can't help but smile. The first, I don't know, maybe 10 minutes seem to reinforce that you'll be in for a forgotten classic of teen sex movies of yesterday. But then it goes wrong, horribly wrong. The jokes turn stale, everyone involved grows slightly more stupid (not that they were anywhere close to MENSA members before, but you know what I mean) And the movie just loses pretty much everything it may have had going for it, ceasing to be fun or even entertaining. I really wonder if there will ever be a good film centered around video games (in all likelihood not, but one can dream)

My Grade: D

Eye Candy:Kym Malin & Kim Michel get topless; Erin Halligan shows all

... like no other movie of it's time, this low budget exploitation GEM literally embodies the 1980s like no other. "Joysticks," capturing the time of video arcades and gaming, when it was still something new and mind blowing. Those who are able to leave their pretentions at the door can be transported back to a world without the tiresome worries of adult responsibility, that short lived time when getting laid and hanging with our friends while looking like rock stars at all times was our only concern . The plot is simple : a middle-aged jackass thinks his Valley girl daughter is wasting her life hanging at the local video arcade, so he embarks on a campaign to close the place down. Here ensues a classic "Generation War" as the local kids, the "Vidiots" shut the old guy down at every turn. "Joysticks" is loaded with color, music, quck cuts, T&A, and best of all... comedy that is so completely wacky that it's actually funny. If you were born in the 70s and were lucky enough to have that coveted cable TV box in your home, chances are that THIS movie is locked into your psyche for all time. Yeah, they used to show "Joysticks" on the Showtime channel, which was racier than the more family friendly HBO, and they would only air it after 10pm because of all that T&A.. I guess they had the idea that the kids would be in their beds that late at night, but that was a misjudgement. The parents were asleep, oblivious to all the fun the kids were having with movies like this. Watching this today is certainly an experience, a real nostalgia overload. There were countless teen oriented movies like this, but "Joysticks" with its otherworldly set design and shameless juvenile humor and objectification of women, stands out as the King of them all. Show this one to your teenaged kids, and make them jealous that they were born too late.

It was that bad. I've occasionally rented a video that I fell asleep during and didn't bother to rewatch, or just didn't finish watching--period. But this was the only movie I ever paid admission to see that I didn't finish watching--and that's saying a lot for me. Joe Don Baker must have really needed some quick money to star in this stinker.

A beautiful majestic and taut thriller set against the backdrop of a suburban video arcade. Joe Don Baker gives us a towering performance as the cliched angry parent wanting to shut the arcade down. It's amazing that even now, 20 years later, the film still inspires, still excites and still amazes even the most jaded movie viewer. If there is a God, I know that even he must get a smile on his face from the pointless nudity and hours upon hours of video game playing that this movie portrays with such raw tenacity and such POWER! 10/10. Long live "Joysticks!"