La invasión de las tarántulas gigantes

I try to watch this movie every year or so. It reminds me of my youth when I didn't have any preconceived notions about what a film should or shouldn't be. A time when I had total suspension of disbelief.

I remember when my ten-year-old eyes first caught a glance at the greatest horror movie poster that ever hung in the hallowed foyer of our local movie theatre, The D&R in Aberdeen, Washington. The poster featured a gargantuan spider bearing down on a group of terrified people. Suspended in the air above the monster were three helicopters and lying crumpled at the spider's legs were a couple of burning cars while spotlights filled the sky. One of the terrified was a busty young blonde wearing only a negligee. I was sold.

Every kid in town must have seen the `coming soon' poster because the next day in school all halls were abuzz with nervous anticipation of what was going to be the greatest cinematic experience of our young lives: THE GIANT SPIDER INVASION! Our local newspaper (The Daily World) had a beautiful half-page advertisement featuring the glorious poster art. I cut it out and hung it on the refrigerator so my mom wouldn't forget.

After a torturous week of school, the opening day finally arrived. Packs of kids, with parents in tow, rushed to secure a place in line at the D&R. The line wrapped around the block. Aberdeen hadn't seen this much excitement since Jaws played there the previous year.

Once inside the lobby, ushers showered the crowd with little black plastic spiders. Kids scrambled everywhere – clawing and climbing over each other to get their hands on these rare collector's items. I snagged a few off the ground and then rushed into the theatre to secure a seat for my Mom, my brother and me.

The theatre was filled to capacity. Those who did not make it in for the first show were forced to wait until the 9:00 p.m. show. Back in the seventies there were only two show times during the weekdays: 7:00p.m. and 9:00p.m. It was truly Darwin's `survival of the fittest' in action.

At precisely 7:00p.m., the theatre grew dark and the screen was illuminated with the coming attraction: Squirm! The theatre was filled with whoops and screams as slime-coated killer worms with fangs tore into flesh, but soon a collective kid-groan could be heard as the rating `R' flashed after the preview. Thankfully, our attention was focused off the fact that most of our parents would not permit us to see the `R' rated film when the title: The Giant Spider Invasion filled the screen.

For the next 85 minutes, we were treated to a town exposed to a `miniature' black hole' that creates a `space warp' inviting in alien-spiders that grow to mammoth proportions. The film really delivered the goods! A grungy farmer discovers a half-eaten body whose rib-cage is partially exposed, a girl comes out of the shower baring her breasts and, in a glorious shower of blood, the spiders suck up a couple of people into their puckered-festering mouths! Cries of horror and disbelief could be heard throughout the auditorium. A couple of ushers had to remove a bawling friend of mine after he saw the partially eaten remains of one of the victims – too much for his delicate sensibilities. I sat transfixed. This was the greatest movie ever made. The next day, I dragged a few of my friends to watch the matinee – we stayed for the remaining showings and returned the following day. The movie played in Aberdeen for only a week, but I must have seen it a dozen times.

Years later, I found The Giant Spider Invasion at a video store and immediately purchased it. I watched it with the same glee I did back in 1975 and the fond memories I held came flooding back.

Watching it now I chuckle as Alan `The Skipper' Hale delivers lines like, `He's a strange man and he's building up a big head of steam.' But, seeing the spiders, which seemed so real back in the good old D&R, crawl over the beautiful Wisconsin countryside, still gives me a small thrill. Even though it's obvious the spiders are badly made up VW Beetles, it still takes me back to a time when all movies I watched were magical.

There were giants in those days.

A very low-budget horror movie (it was shot in six weeks with a budget of $300,000), about a horde of radioactive mutant spiders with a craving for human flesh emerging from the depths of the earth to invade a rural Wisconsin town after a black hole opens up another dimension. Featuring awful special effects, just the one giant spider (which was constructed by covering a Volkswagen automobile with artificial black fur, with the fake legs operated from the inside by seven members of the crew), and a cast made up of a lot of "has-beens," and B movie veterans, it's tacky as hell but a lot of laughs as the spiders go on the rampage at the towns summer fair. The film received a considerable theatrical run and became one of the 50 top-grossing films of that year, even featuring in an episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000. Listed as one of 'The 100 Most Enjoyably Bad Movies Ever Made' by Golden Raspberry Award founder John Wilson in the book The Official Razzie Movie Guide.

Meteor lands on Wisconsin farm, opening up a black hole that unleashes giant spiders into a hick community!!

Oh boy. Legendary horror cheese filmed in Wisconsin by B movie director Bill Rebane is the perfect example of a film that's so bad it's good! The Giant Spider Invasion is best remembered as the movie in which a VW Beetle was used for the monster spiders! The special FX consists of live tarantulas, unconvincing puppets, and of course those VW's complete with long furry legs. Between those amusing FX, a ridiculous premise, and some funny dialog this cheap horror film never has a dull moment.

Yet as poor as the quality of the film is the cast (which has a number of veteran actors) isn't that bad. In a way it's their serious, well semi-serious, performances that make the occurrences even more humorous.

The Giant Spider Invasion is one of the most unintentionally hilarious horror films ever made and whether you like it or not, you can't deny that it's entertaining! A definite must-see for fans of campy B horror.

** 1/2 out of ****

The Giant Spider Invasion is a superb piece of 1970's B-Horror. Of course, by today's synthetic, digitally enhanced, multi-billion dollar, pseudo-artistic, technologically dependent standards it is a poor film, but remember that 'Spider Invasion' only cost $250,000 to produce.

It is full of small, creepy spiders, developing into mega-bohemoth spiders and laying waste to anything that gets in their way!

Oh sure you can label it cheesy! You can label it hokey! Label it sub-par! B ut isn't that why people watch B-horror? And is not 70's B-horror the true pinnacle of the genre? And did not Mystery Science Theater think it a worthy piece to cover on their show? Me thinks in the affirmative on both questions!

This movie is a worthy effort...dealing with such diverse topics as Alien Invasion, to greed & evil in the social context...to even what Camus referred to as the Existential Dilemma (or something like that)...oh you can find almost anything in any piece of art, but my point is that this is a good movie! It's cheesy, but good; and when I saw it at the age of 6, I thought it was very horrifying!

I still...to this day...cannot drink tomato juice...Thank-you Giant Spider Invasion!

The first time I saw this movie was on an episode of MST3K. From the greasy hick to the doctor from Nassau (NASA) this film has it all (wrong, that is)! I couldn't stop laughing when they finally showed the 'giant spider' that looked like a high school homecoming float. I would recommend this movie to anyone with a lot of time and patience. I only wish they used microphones. It sounded like Thomas Edison was the sound man through part of it. Try and see the MST3K take on this movie. you will die laughing!