The House of the Dead

Whenever the title "House of the Dead" is mentioned nowadays, people – and horror fanatics in particular – automatically link it to that hag Uwe Boll's AWFUL video game horror adaptation about UN-frightening looking CGI zombies on an island. Another movie with the same title existed already since the late 1970's, though it's also known under the completely irrelevant title "Alien Zone", and that one is a lot better! It's a low-budget exploitation attempt to create a horror anthology similar to the contemporary successful British films, like "Tales that Witness Madness" or "Asylum", complete with a detailed wraparound story and a sinister host. Whilst on a business trip in an unknown city, a guy named Talmudge cheats on his wife and gets lost on his way back to the hotel. Since there's a heavy thunderstorm going on, a seemly friendly mortician invites him in and informs him abut the background stories of four "clients" of his. None of these horror mini-tales is groundbreaking or particularly shocking, but they all feature an admirably dark atmosphere and revolve on rather inventive topics. The first story is extremely short and introduces a lonely female schoolteacher with a clear aversion towards children. When she goes home one night, she senses a strange presence in her house and subsequently gets attacked by a large collection of eerily deformed and mask-wearing children. I'm not quite sure what the deeper meaning of this short story was, but those kids sure looked creepy! The second story is – once again – a very short reworking of the classic film "Peeping Tom", with a perverted man inviting girls to his apartment and murdering them for the eye of the camera. The tone of this segment is definitely disturbing, but it has no satisfying ending, since it just cuts back to the mortician who explains the culprit got executed for his crimes. Huh? What's the point? Then comes the third and unquestionably best chapter of "House of the Dead", about an intellectual criminologist competing with his overseas colleague of Scotland Yard for the honor of most deductive police investigator in the world. This segment has an incredibly predictable climax, but it's very enjoyable thanks to the wit dialogs and convincing on screen chemistry between actors Charles Aidman and Bernard Fox. The fourth and final segment hints at some really horrific themes, but unfortunately the elaboration is poor. It's about an egocentric man who gets terrorized by unseen forces and eventually becomes everything he detests himself. Namely a needy and filthy individual who blindly gets passed by on the streets. It's a curious little tale that definitely deserved some more plotting and perhaps a slightly longer playtime. Naturally the film ends with an unmerciful fate for Talmudge (adultery, remember…). The late 70's definitely brought forward better horror films than this, but "House of the Dead" is nonetheless a worthwhile and entertaining little chiller that offers a handful of frights and delightful genre clichés. It's a film for undemanding trash-fans.

John Ericson ventures out in the rain after having been left off by a cab at the wrong street. Soon he finds refuge in an old building with a friendly mortician that gives him tea and shows him some of his "clients." There are some easy clues early in the wrap-around story for this anthology to tell you where that story is going, especially after having just seen the man prior to getting in the cab have an adulterous pleasure period with someone else's wife. But the frame story is really just a means to allow mortician Ivor Francis to tell his stories about his clients. I always liked Francis for his calm presence and subtle humour, yet here he is given some really bad dialog but does manage to put some life into this otherwise drab little film. The problem with this, also known for some inexplicable reason as Alien Zone(I saw House of the Dead copy), is that the budget here is really minuscule and the stories, what special effects there are, and acting quality are all directly affected. Nothing is shown. I was shocked that we never even got to see the faces of the dead corpses in the coffins - now that is low budget! The first story deals with a teacher who it seems dislikes children - based on one scene of her walking from her car scowling. She then goes home and the supernatural effects of red tinting children wearing masks and wearing what appear as shark teeth begins. Truly terrifying. (Yawn.) The second story has some real bad actor lure women into his apartment so he can film them being killed. It's done in an almost comedic fashion and has virtually no substance at all. Then there is the one story that I did really like and does have a bit of budget and real actors. The third story has Charles Aidman and Bernard Fox as two great detectives out to outwit the other and become the leading criminologist in the world. This episode has some humor and clever dialog and of course both Aidman and especially Fox have acting ability. You get an idea where it is going but should enjoy it nonetheless. It ends way too abruptly though. The last story is pretty decent too as we see a man who seems to be a person that doesn't care about the society around him get locked into an abandoned building and fed on booze until he becomes a boozer like the one he snubbed earlier. Despite its ridiculous story, the effects of despair are not all that bad. Then of course there is the obvious conclusion to the frame story. This movie was cheaply made and has that real cheap feel to it, but it isn't that bad and a couple of the stories are relatively interesting and none so bad as they are not watchable.

If you're looking for another Tales From the Crypt or Creepshow, The House of the Dead will disappoint you pretty brutally. For all its flaws, it does have a striking low budget 1970's mood and they lay it on pretty thick, so it's hard to call the filmmakers untalented or hacks, because they clearly have talent - it just might have benefited them to have another few cracks at the script.

As with most anthologies, there's a wraparound story which is almost exactly the same as the one in Tales From the Crypt (and it would be used again, if reworked, in Tales From the Hood). A mortician tells a man 4 stories about his most recent clients.

The first story centers around a bitter schoolteacher who gets her comeuppance when she goes home for the evening. While it would help for us to see this teacher being a little bit more cruel (all she really does is yell at a kid to get away from her car and get angry at neighborhood kids for leaving their junk in her yard. Understandable.), this segment probably has the most suspense even if the pay off isn't really good. There are lots of creepy moments of the teacher wondering if she left this door unlocked or had that radio on before she left the room. It's subtle and builds tension pretty well.

The next is about a guy who kills women and films them. It's pretty dull. After that, we have the most boring of the stories with two detectives...talking...about stuff...for what seems like an eternity. The final story doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but it's better than the previous one and involves an awful guy getting trapped in a building overnight as some supernatural force tries to drive him insane.

A decent no-frills horror anthology that begins with a cheating husband know only as Talmudge trying to locate his hotel in a taxi during a downpour. When the driver drops him off on a darkly lit street that apparently is not the correct address he drives off leaving Talmudge to fend for himself on a very wet evening. Stumbling upon a residence he encounters an elderly individual who invites him in from the rain which Talmudge nervously excepts. He learns that the old man is a mortician who seems interested in showing him some of his "clients" along with a little backstory on how they met with their respective demises. With an apprehensive Talmudge as his witness the mortician begins. The first story is a short one about a teacher that hates children (I had quite a few of them). When she arrives home she is harassed by what seem to be small children in Halloween masks who turn out to be anything but. The second story is also short and is by far the weakest of the four, concerning a man who likes to videotape himself murdering women. This story literally goes nowhere. Next is a pleasantly engaging number about two of the world's best criminologists, one from New York the other from England, engaged in a spirited investigation when one of them receives a rather cryptic note concerning murder. The ending, though no surprise, is still quite satisfying. Last is sort of an early and gore-free "Saw" as a pompous office worker who has no time for anyone else gets himself trapped in an abandoned store that has been turned into a trap complete with a wall of nails as he is held captive with only a bottle of wine occasionally rolled into his prison by a faceless person. Upon his mysterious release he is transformed into the very blight on society that he himself so loathed. When the stories are finished it is time for Talmudge's come-uppance as this is about punishing people for their sins and he is after all an adulterer to which the mortician has his coffin at the ready.

You won't recognize anybody in this movie nor will the made-for-t.v. feel instill any genuine fear while watching it. However, I do think that for the most part the stories were pretty interesting considering this was made before both "Creepshow" and "Twilight Zone the Movie" which had bigger budgets. Sadly, when one thinks of "House of the Dead" they more than likely associate it with the Uwe Boll abomination based on the video game rather than this film which is tragic. Why anyone would name this "Alien Zone" is a mystery to me as there isn't a hint of aliens to speak of. I did see the heavily edited 74 minute version as the running time on the DVD jacket said it was 100 minutes long. Twenty six minutes is a lot to cut out so who knows maybe there are aliens in that one. Might be a little too light for hard core horror fans but never the less I recommend giving this flick a shot.

What an unfortunately titled film. If it goes by House of the Dead, it inescapably gets mistaken for Uwe Boll's quote-unquote "masterpiece", and if it goes by Alien Zone it's doomed to deceive audiences into disappointment. Looking past the title however, this isn't a bad film. Though as far as I'm concerned Creepshow is and always will be the be-all-and-end-all horror anthologies, this is still a nice effort. The wrap-around story is pretty weak, though the way the stories are presented is pretty cool. Ivor Francis plays a rather creepy mortician telling the macabre stories of his "aquisitions" to a man who just had a bit of extra-marital fun.

The first story is pretty weak, about a mean spirited teacher who gets whats coming to her. The main actress is awful, the attempt at special effects is just as bad, and the story isn't all that strong to begin with.

It picks up some with the second story, which concerns a man who lures women to his apartment and films himself killing them. The main actor is pretty over-the-top, but he makes for a pretty good lunatic. Unfortunately his victims leave a lot to be desired. The story isn't very original, but it was still interesting.

Story #3 is easily the best of the lot. It's about the world's two greatest detectives teaming up on a case...or are they? The acting in this one is surprisingly good, the American detective reminded me of a cross between Al Pacino and a teacher at my school. The story was great, the ending, though obvious, was fitting....overall this was a great story.

The fourth and final story was pretty good too, though not as good as it's predecessor. It revolves around a miserable man who gets himself trapped in a building and tormented endlessly by an unseen force. The actor was decent, the plot was good and it ended well.

The closing of the wrap-around story wasn't very good...very predictable and a huge letdown after seeing two pretty good stories.

Overall, this anthology is definitely worth watching. The low budget shows, but it's entertaining and has at least a couple really good stories. It does have it's flaws though, such as terrible acting and a very weak first story, so I cant rate it too high. I recommend seeing it for yourself.

6/10