Wonder Women

I stumbled upon the 1973 movie "Wonder Women" by random chance here in 2024. Even with it being a movie that is two years older than me, then I didn't hesitate to sit down and watch the movie. I had never heard about it, nor did I know about it existing, so I had no idea what I was in for here.

In that sense, then writers Lou Whitehill and Robert Vincent O'Neil, with the latter also directing the movie, had every opportunity to entertain me with their 1973 movie. I had zero expectations to the movie when I sat down to watch it.

The movie started out with a hilarious death scene of a security guard, where the actor just over-did the dying. It had me laughing so hard. And with that we were off to a glorious early 1970s foray of crime action.

The script was adequate, though a bit on the cheesy and campy side. I suppose it was that particular 1970s flavor to the movie. That being said, I am not saying that "Wonder Women" is a bad movie, because it definitely was a watchable movie, and entertaining enough for what it turned out to be. Though you must have a certain degree of interest in movies of this particular genre and era to fully enjoy the movie from director Robert Vincent O'Neil.

I was surprised to find the likes of Ross Hagen and Sid Haig on the cast list. They were, in fact, the only two performers that I were familiar with on the cast list. The acting performances in the movie were good, taking everything into consideration.

All in all, a fair enough movie that proved entertaining for a single viewing.

My rating of "Wonder Women" lands on a five out of ten stars.

After the mysterious disappearance of one of the biggest names in Jai alai (a variation of the sport pelota), insurance investigator Mike Harber (Ross Hagen) is hired to try and find the missing sportsman. Mike's search leads him to the heavily guarded island fortress of Dr. Tsu (Nancy Kwan), where the unscrupulous surgeon has been harvesting the bodies of athletes abducted by her all-female army and using their limbs and organs in illegal transplant operations for the super-rich.

Opening with a scene in which several topless female swimmers are abducted by Dr. Tsu's sexy hench-women, this early 70s USA/Philippines production starts as it means to go on by being unashamedly exploitative trash. As his film unfolds, director Robert Vincent O'Neill (who also gave us the equally exploitative Angel and Avenging Angel) piles on the outlandishness, delivering a prolonged chase scene through the streets of Manila (which involves some particularly perilous looking stunts), some really bad fight scenes (his actresses clearly total strangers to the martial arts), lots of leggy babes in revealing outfits, and a very silly finale that sees a bunch of Dr. Tsu's failed experiments running amok on the island (the daft creatures including a half man/half ape and a guy who sports a glass cranium with an orange beacon inside). All of this is accompanied by a cool funky '70s soundtrack.

The movie's kitschy style also adds immensely to the fun factor: there are go-go boots and hot-pants aplenty, Dr. Tsu's operating theatre boasts cutting-edge psychedelic coloured lighting and swirly hypno-discs (while her PVC operating gown is the height of '70s surgical fashion), and Mike samples the delights of 'brain sex' via a silly high-tech headband covered with diodes.

Add supporting roles for cult favourites Vic Dias and Sid Haig, and what you have is a delightfully daft piece of nonsense—not great film-making by any stretch of the imagination—but highly entertaining nonetheless.

After a dozen high-profile athletes from all over the world go missing, Lloyds of London hires an insurance detective by the name of "Mike Harbor" (Ross Hagen) to investigate--and if possible rescue--a particular jai alai player who is insured by them. In the course of the investigation he soon discovers a secret island belonging to a beautiful doctor named "Dr. Tsu" (Nancy Kwan) who commands a select team of females that kidnap certain athletes for the purpose of harvesting their organs. The problem for Mike is that Dr. Tsu is well aware of his investigation and she intends to stop him at all costs. Anyway, rather than disclose the rest of the movie and risk spoiling it for those who haven't seen it, I will just say that this low-budget film definitely showed its limitations. Although Ross Hagen, Nancy Kwan and Sid Haig (as "Gregorious") all performed adequately, the rest of the cast was clearly second-rate and it showed. Additionally, some of the fight scenes were just plain awful. As a matter of fact, the best thing about this movie was the presence of some attractive women which included Roberta Collins (as "Laura"), Maria De Aragon ("Linda") and the aforementioned Nancy Kwan. So while this movie had its good moments I have a little difficulty rating it higher than I have. Slightly below average.

American insurance agent Mike Harber (Ross Hagen) is hot on the trail of missing athletes and musicians, and finds the answer in the Phillipine jungle lair of the cold but brilliant Dr Su (Nancy Kwan). With her squad of multi-racial superchicks, she sells the body parts to aging millionaires, but all hell breaks loose when her failed mutation experiments escape from the dungeons. Whacko Filipino actioner is more over-the- top than most of its breed, an insane mix of Doll Squad and Island Of Dr Moreau, which opens with a cheesy montage of the five superchicks in action, complete with big afros and fur bikinis. All your favourite Filipino comedy-relief regulars are here - chubby Vic Diaz plays the cycle-cab driver, and Sid Haig (with hair!) is Dr Su's accountant. Hagen was also producer, and in recent years appeared in Fred Olen Ray films with his other skidrow contemporaries. Once-popular Chinese-American actress Kwan had faded into obscurity by the late 60s, and was last seen on Australian TV advertising pearl cream.

This spy satire, in which a nasty female "Dr. No" (Nancy Kwan) trains a number of women assassins to go out and win the world for her, is rather inane entertainment. However, having seen dozens like it, with better heroes than Ross Hagen, there are so many vivid scenes in my mind that it must be better than most! Cinematography and direction were certainly above medium, and Marilyn Joi and Maria de Aragon are wonderful bad girls.