Supersonic Man

...if you're a lover of bad cinema. From the horrible credit sequence which desperately tries to copy SUPERMAN, to the super cheesy flying sequences, to scenes of hero lifting up things like an incredibly fake looking, wooden (yes, wooden) bulldozer, director J.P. Simon delivers the goods yet again! The man who brought you PIECES and SLUGS doesn't disappoint. If you have no life, viewing this film is a must!!!

Me and my high school dog pack caught this movie by chance one late night on Channel 44 in the Bay Area. Perhaps by devine intervention, I hit the record button and got the whole film on tape. It provided us and our respective families with endless laughs. We even composed a song/chant out of some of our favorite lines that we would recite religiously in the park at night (This is true San Jose-style recreation!!) Highlights? The terrifying killer robot that displayed the speed and swiftness of a cheetah! That devastating glare of Supersonic's evil nemesis as he monitors his underlings' treacherous deeds. The timeless beauty and personal complexity of Supersonic's love interest, Patricia Morgan. And the special effects -- especially the balsa wood steamroller, realistic-looking toy helicopter and the seamless camera work the director achieved whenever Paul morphs into Supersonic. To the uninitiated: May the forces of the universe be with you in your quest to see this movie!!

Juan Piquer Simon used to be a postman (thus linking him to Fabrizio de Angelis, ex-postman and director of "Killer Crocodile"), but quit his job to step into the movie business. If his mail delivery was as excellent as his knowledge of movie making, I wouldn't send a letter to Spain.

Supersonic Man is so obviously a Superman rip-off that I'm almost ashamed to mention it. Still, shame is something Piquer Simon didn't seem to have. Granted, the man has lots of imagination, but so has a toddler who draws three lines on a piece of paper and says it's a car. Supersonic (for that is his name) is sleeping in a spaceship when an intergalactic voice tells him an evil mastermind wants to kidnap a professor so he, the evil mastermind, can rule over the world. The evil mastermind is none other than Cameron Mitchell, actor in a handful of classics and the lead in over 150 B- to D-movies. In this production he's the biggest (read: only) star.

Supersonic doesn't take the train, like any superhero he can fly. Well, flying... it does look like the actor is busy pretending to swim in the air. Go lie on a bench and move your body first 10° to the left and then 20° to the right. Keep doing that, add a blue screen and you too can fly. To make us believe the movie was shot in the US, Supersonic often flies in the air with parts of New York in the background. Unfortunately, that's the only use of these scenes, so basically you're just watching a man in a silly suit pretending he can fly.

Supersonic's suit may give you a few chuckles, but what really got me rolling on the floor is the scene where the professor's daughter (Patricia) is chased by gangsters. Just when it looks like her car is going to hit a bulldozer, Supersonic lifts it up with one hand. Though, why a bulldozer is standing in the middle of a forest road beats me, just as it's quite fascinating to see the bulldozer is actually made of wood. The crooks try to avoid hitting the bulldozer, drive down a hill and for some reason that should explain why their car explodes.

The bulldozer scene is featured quite early in the movie, so it's best to stay on the floor. Don't crawl back into your couch as an avalanche of bad scenes is still coming your way: bad special effects (toy helicopters anyone?), cheesy humour and even more bad special effects (toy houses?). Oh, did I mention already the plot is hard to follow and some plot lines commence but never go anywhere? Frankly, "Mulholland Drive" is easier to follow.

To make things even worse, this Spanish action movie (let's use that phrase lightly) is dubbed in university English. When the giant robot bursts into the professor's lab to kidnap him, the professor states: "What kind of tomfoolery is this?" One has to admire those academics, if not for their vocabulary, then for the fact that he doesn't start laughing when the giant and fierce (and frankly slow) robot appears.

Juan Piquer Simon is sometimes compared to Ed Wood, but at least Wood had a vision (a vision hindered by a budget, but still a vision). "Supersonic Man" however is a work that makes "Killer Crocodile" look like a masterpiece. Which in its own right is quite special.

It just seems logical that the Italians would have made something along the lines of Superman as they often do versions of successful films such as Jaws, Star Wars and Alien. I had just never really seen any like I had the others; however, I have seen one now, Supersonic Man! Yes, he looks super built, but his costume definitely needs more work and his alter ego is played by a completely different person. Though the plus side on that is that it is harder to discover his identity, but the villain seems to think it is one and the same guy. And speaking of villains, never before has the screen seen a villain such as the one here, who seems to have no real goal beyond boring an old man to death with his discussions.

The story, Supersonic Man is dispatched to Earth because something so dastardly is about to go down that it will cause ripples throughout the universe! Actually, I think whoever gives orders to Supersonic Man really oversold the threat, not sure the villain would have been too much trouble for a normal person to take out. A professor is kidnapped and Supersonic Man under his guise as Paul comforts her and for reasons unknown will search warehouses as Paul who has no powers so that he can get captured!

Supersonic man seems to have rather vague powers. Seems he has super strength and speed sure, but also the ability to turn a gun into a banana... Suffice to say, he is nearly indestructible to lava, freezing cold and bullets so it makes little sense they they try a flame throwing slowly walking robot at him. The only thing that seems to stop him is high frequency sound.

So, this film is rather lame, but entertaining to watch. I laughed quite a bit when a car goes down a somewhat steep incline and just explodes! Then a boat explodes for no reason and then a house explodes! Everything in this film is very prone to just blowing up! The villain is the typical villain of this era, no powers whatsoever and lots and lots of henchmen. Supervillains literally did not start appearing until like the 2000 films and no Batman's villains are not supervillains, just costumed insane villains!

It says Spain everywhere on the page. Film locations, where most of the cast and director are from. Takes 10 seconds to see it. Nothing surprises me anymore...Anyway this is a SPANISH made knockoff of Superman by one of the more ambitious B movie directors I can think of, Juan Piquer Simón. This director also did the ET knockoff better known to MST3K fans as Pod People. A little boy and his love for Trumpy. Yeah...

Aside from Pumaman, I dont remember Italian studio production companies by this time willing to try a movie with much special effects. They were mostly obsessed with trying to make Mad Max, Road Warrior, Escape From New York, Warriors knockoffs (i mean homages). They are less reliant on effects and expensive locations, same reason they were so good at making Westerns. I think Italian filmmakers learned not to try special effects on this scale after War of the Robots.

This movie is overly ambitious given its financial limitations. All the dialogue is dubbed in which was standard practice in European moviee back then. The star is Cameron Mitchell and the male lead actor's mustache. His character loses the mustache when he morphs into this large pasty skinned expressionless guy in tights.

There are moments of comic relief that mostly gave me a puzzled expression than a laugh. I am not entirely sure what Dr Gulik's world domination plan is but Cameron Mitchell does get to quote Shakespeare and have some overly dramatic scenes as the villain. Some long scenes like his dinner with the scientist he elaborately kidnaps in the first act then doesn't do much with him when he is around are just excuses for dramatic speeches. With so much technology at his disposal, you'd think he'd give the kidnapped scientist sodium pentothal or at least a mind altering brain ray to force his collaboration instead of endlessly trying to kidnap his daughter. I suspect Cameron Mitchell did this movie for an all expense paid vacation in Spain. It is better than other Cameron Mitchell movies he was doing by this time like Frankenstein Island but I did like Cataclysm which is about a demon returning to earth so he can act like a jerk.