Matt Helm contra las asesinas

Having managed to acquire this one soon after THE SILENCERS (1966) and THE WRECKING CREW (1969), I can say that, while a definite comedown from those two Matt Helm adventures directed by Phil Karlson, it’s fairly enjoyable in itself and far from the “uncontrolled disaster area” the late eminent critic Leslie Halliwell took the sequels to be (though I haven’t been able to get my hands yet on THE AMBUSHERS [1967], considered the worst in the series).

Things start off nicely enough with the elimination of all the top I.C.E. agents: Helm’s photo has him taken from the back – thus making his undercover activity later within the enemy ranks seem more plausible – but, amusingly, amply displaying his fondness for booze and broads. The villain this time around is played by Karl Malden, while Helm’s women include Ann-Margret (as the daughter of an inventor of a deadly ray being held captive by Malden) and the latter’s assistant Camilla Sparv; the girls both look good but aren’t given a lot to do – besides, Ann-Margret relies too much on the energetic dancing style she had displayed in the Elvis Presley vehicle VIVA LAS VEGAS (1964)…though this does result in a funny scene inside a nightclub where Martin has a hard time trying to ape (and keep up with) her irrepressible moves! Incidentally, despite the set-up at the end of THE SILENCERS with respect to the upcoming contribution of Beverly Adams’ Lovey Kravezit, it’s still too brief (to say nothing of secondary) here!

The film also features an imposing henchman fitted with an iron plate over his bald head – appropriately dubbed “Metalhead” – who may or may not have inspired the “Jaws” character from a couple of much-later James Bond adventures; the hovercraft chase (starting at sea, continuing on dry land, and ending in a crowded street) also anticipates the one from the 007 flick MOONRAKER (1979). As for preposterous gadgets, here we get a gun programmed to delay shooting for a few seconds – so that, if it were to fall into enemy hands, the holder will invariably point the gun at himself (believing it to be empty) with fatal consequences! Martin, of course, gets to sing as well – and there’s another jibe at Frank Sinatra; however, a rather blatant goof went unnoticed by the film-makers: Martin and Ann-Margret flee a scene in the latter’s car (with the top uncovered) but, somewhere down the line, the vehicle turns into that usually driven by Martin (complete with specially-fitted equipment to thwart the pursuers)! Once again, then, the final scene paves the way for the next entry in the series.

Matt spews of his usual lighthearted, spoof lines, surrounded by his coterie of lovely women, but this one is less interesting than others in the series, altho Karl Malden does OK as villain Julian Wall. He is trying to dominate Dr. Solaris, the secret weapon (laser) scientist, who is the father of Suzie, played by leading lady Anne Margret. In fact, she is the highlight of the movie, for aside from being gorgeous, she does some fabulous dancing. On the other hand, Matt's fight scenes, particularly with Wall's henchman Ironhead, leave something to be desired. Matt and Coco (Julian's significant other) have mild flirtations, but aside from Suzie, there is no other lady authentically part of the plot with whom Matt has the least sort of romantic interlude. Overall, a little more zip was needed, plot sometime dragged a bit. Still, the usual good chase scenes, colorful scenery and clothing, elegant settings, etc. -- fun to watch.

MASTER PLAN: Operation:Scorch - use a new heat ray on Washington DC. After "The Silencers," there was no where to go but with more fun in the sun with Matt Helm - poking fun, that is, at the James Bond spy genre. Dino Martin is as lackadaisical as ever as Helm, the part-time super agent, barely awake in some scenes and ready with the cute quips in, well, every line of dialog. To illustrate the difference between Helm & Bond: Bond, as an example, is allowed one minor joke during his usual mission briefing with M. Now, Helm jokes with his boss, MacDonald (James Gregory, reprising his role) during the entire session, even as MacDonald tells him that Helm may have to commit suicide during the mission. 'I ain't going' Helm quips. The villains are again the evil organization Big-O(oh), who target all the major secret agents as the film starts, including Helm. But, this is one of those false deaths for the hero, just as was done in a couple of the Bonders (and they don't explain how Helm survives). The action takes Helm to Monte Carlo, where a primarily young crowd do a lot of dancing and swinging. Helm searches for a scientist who is providing Big-O (led by Karl Malden) with the final formulas for a super heat ray.

The action slows down at the mid-point, especially with the seemingly endless scenes of young folks shaking their bodies to sixties tunes. The filmmakers manage to work Sinatra in again in a sort-of cameo. The absurdity and sight gags are at the usual level: all of Helm's girlfriends attend his funeral dressed exactly the same. The main henchman walks around in public with this big metal plate covering the top of his head and no one notices. Helm drinks while driving and on the job, joking with the liquor bottles. Ann-Margret plays the daughter of the missing scientist and she's always great, no matter what she's doing, but she even gets quite involved in some strenuous action towards the end. Sparv is fine as the femme fatale, with her slightly exotic good looks, though she inexplicably seems to change sides near the end (Helm never even had a chance to seduce her). Malden as the head villain does not do as well, speaking with a dopey accent which fades in and out. He is the subject of an effective on-going gag with a gun that delays firing for a few seconds. The climactic action in the villains' lair is not bad, with some actual suspense and humor mixed in, though the very conclusion on the hovercrafts, on the water, seems like an afterthought. The epilogue is just too silly. Helm would return in "The Ambushers." Hero:6 Villain:5 Femme Fatales:7 Henchmen:6 Fights:6 Stunts/Chases:6 Gadgets:5 Auto:4 Locations:7 Pace:6 overall:6-

Murderers' Row, the second of the Matt Helm films that starred Dean Martin has the distinction of being the one that actually gave old Dino a hit record. Martin never sang directly on the screen, but his voice was heard on the soundtrack during soliloquy sequences and in background music. I'm Not The Marrying Kind was the only written for a Matt Helm feature that he's heard singing over the action, especially during the final scene.

Fans of the books that James Bond and Matt Helm were taken from have always said that Hollywood ruined the character. It's probably more true for Matt Helm because Dino doesn't play it for anything other than laughs. James Bond would never talk about sexual escapades, but with Dino as Matt Helm, you know this is all locker room fodder.

Dr. Richard Eastham has invented a solar ray which evil master criminal Karl Malden wants to subvert for his own use. He's planning for a death ray to wipe out Washington, DC. Both Martin and Eastham's daughter Ann-Margret are searching for Eastham, reputed to be with Malden on his private island off the Riviera where with mistress Carmilla Sparv, Malden's planning all kinds of dastardly deeds.

Dino who also produced the Helm series, gave a guest shot to Dino, Desi, and Billy who were a bubblegum band sensation around that time.

Malden looks like he's having a good old blast overacting outrageously as the master criminal. Dino as he is in all the Matt Helm is just Dean Martin as a secret agent. Just giving the public what they wanted at the time which was probably the height of his career.

But whatever you do, don't look at the title Murderers' Row and think it's about the 1927 New York Yankees. The sports are indoors in this film.

MURDERER'S ROW is the second Matt Helm movie and just as sloppy and ill-conceived as THE SILENCERS. It's also just about as much fun. Dean Martin, clearly not sticking to any script, has a few funny one-liners and Ann-Margret is Ann-Margret...as a swinging sixties sex kitten, she's second to none. Karl Malden collects a paycheck as the villain and the stunning Camilla Sparv plays his moll. There are a few amusing scenes such as Dean in a line-up with two French peasants and the women's outfits are very Rudi Gernreich without actually being designed by Gernreich. The film, directed by Henry Levin, could just as easily have been named "LONG SHOTS and STUNT MEN" when you consider how few close-ups Martin has during the action sequences.