Death Is a Woman

Dennis (Mark Burns), a British agent of some sort, is on "the island" (Malta but it's not named) to carry out an undercover investigation of two crooked casino owners. The suspicion is that they get guests who run up gambling debts to become the sort of smuggler Customs won't suspect. Dennis runs up a debt in the hope he'll be induced into the racket. The film opens with the murder of one of owners by Francesca (Patsy Ann Noble), a femme very fatale indeed, and her lover Joe (Shaun Curry ), who want all the ill-gotten gains for themselves. The other owner, Malo, is found dead just after he'd given Dennis an advance in return for his passport. The local police naturally suspect Dennis. The thing is Malo was found in a locked room, seven floors up with no sign of the murder weapon. The solution to this locked-room mystery is about as good as this film gets. Priscilla (Wanda Ventham) is sent out from the UK to help Dennis while posing as his fiancé. So far, so good. But that's as good as it gets. We get to see sunny skies and sparkling seas, we get to see another of Joe's girls topless in a scene that seems to be included because they'd an actress who'd go topless back in 1966 or maybe to get a 1960's X rating, we get to see the good girl and the bad girl in their bikinis, and - not much else. The film is padded out to barely feature length with Anita Harris singing a song, multiple sequences of our hero darting down side streets trying to dodge the most visible police tail in history and of our villainess swimming underwater. Cut out the padding and the topless scene and you'd have had a good hour-long episode of a Sixties TV series.

Not since the days of Louise Brooks has such an ugly nature lain behind such an innocent face as Patsy Ann Noble in 'Death is a Woman'.

Already established as a cute little teeny-bopper during the early sixties Noble here displays her charms in a pink bikini against a glamorous Mediterranean backdrop as a deceptively sweet-looking femme fatale deep in sin; her angelic face masking an avaricious nature matched only by her appetite for men and lust for money unconcerned that her lifestyle is funded by the proceeds of dope-smuggling.

But don't worry (SPOILER COMING:) she gets her comeuppance in the end.

This movie has got it all: stunning photography, excellent (character) actors, bikinis, superb underwater-scenes......and: a great musical score! Although the story could have been more exciting this off-beat pearl of 60s UK-crime is definitely worth an 8 out of 10.

Jazzy, beatnik themed 1965 time capsule from British Pathé with secret agent Mark Burns attempting to solve a murder in which he finds himself implicated. Joined by fellow agent Wanda Ventham posing as his fiancée, the pair must outsmart the seductive yet sinister Trisha Noble and her brawny bed partner Shaun Curry, before they pull-off a daring crime and disappear into the sunset. The frantic pace set to a frenetic bongo arrangement and colourful Mediterranean scenery, almost compensate for a relatively thin plot, in which enchantress Noble's bronzed and bikini-clad rig saunters from scotch on the rocks, to scuba-diving into underwater caves leaving a trail of destruction in her voluptuous wake. It's a visually attractive postcard light on sense, but somehow entertaining in spite of its plot weaknesses. Noble is better than you might think, and the set design and location work is all first-rate at depicting the mid-sixties Maltese tourist culture, its buzzing basement nightclubs, and azure blue sun-drenched coastline. A highly stylised cultural artefact worth preserving.

DEATH IS A WOMAN is a second-rate British spy drama filmed in Malta to give it an exotic Mediterranean flavour. The story sees espionage taking place when an agent is shipped in to uncover a drug smuggling ring involving the transport of heroin shipments, and our man's job is to find out who's doing it and stop them in their tracks.

What sounds like it should be a light and breezy affair is in fact plodding and unworkable, suffering from wooden male leads and a leaden pacing. There's a dearth of action to boot that makes this tough to watch at times, and it's only the Swinging Sixties trappings that saw me through it. That, and an exemplary female cast, all of whom parade around in their bikinis and look exquisite. Actresses featured include Wanda Ventham, Patsy Ann Noble, and the arresting Caron Gardner. Watch out for typecast heavyweight Michael Brennan's cameo as a murderous butcher.