Sam's Song

There are two sorts of people who should watch THE SWAP: people desperate for every minute of De Niro footage they can get, and fans of ultra-low-budget grade-Z schlock.

Although not quite in the class of such anti-classics as ROBOT MONSTER and PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE, this moronic little flick is certainly up there--er, down there--with travesties like MESA OF LOST WOMEN, THE SINISTER URGE, and THEY SAVED HITLER'S BRAIN (another "Frankenfilm" stitched together from an atrocious low-budget movie and even worse lower-budget new footage).

For a bad movie connoisseur, THE SWAP is well worth the few bucks you'll spend for the DVD.

I don't think this movie itself is the worst ever put to screen and we all know De Niro can act, so I'm going to have to blame the no name directors who shot this movie in two different sittings and obviously had no idea how to bring the best acting abilities out of someone. De Niro's role for this movie was shot by one director for a movie with a different title and then later inserted into a re-cut version, which is evident by the fact that two different actresses portray Erica even though the time-line between the flashback scenes are only ten years. It doesn't even look like the same person. The movie ends with a lot of unanswered questions but that's only because the filmmakers ran out of money and never finished making it. So all in all, don't expect a ton of entertainment out of this film. Watch it if only to see a very early Robert De Niro performance under bad directing.

Okay the story is this: De Niro made some lame movie name around 1969 Sam's Song that never saw the light of day. Fast forward a few years (say around 1980) and De Niro is a star so some joker gets a hold of Sam's Song, recuts it, adds some footage and viola! The Swap was born! Which is probably even worse than Sam's Song.

So if you are a De Niro diehard, you have been warned. But hey, so was I and I saw it anyway.

I would say I took a gamble by purchasing this movie, but it's hard to constitute $6.99 as a gamble. It came in a boxed with set with another old DeNiro movie, "Born to Run," which I haven't watched yet. Well, like I cynically expected, DeNiro is NOT the star of this film. Sure, his name appears first in the opening credits, but I'm guessing that's because the film was re-issued in 1980 and by then, DeNiro was already a moderately big star. The story basically centers around his character, but we only see him once in the first scene, and then momentarily in flashbacks. This was back when DeNiro had that Tom Selleck-like moustache, looking like an out-of-work porn star.

Not to be totally negative, the unknown actor who plays the main character gives a pretty good, though one-note, performance. The rest of the actors--except for DeNiro--could've been just as effective reading their lines off cue cards. And judging by the way this film was made--like a third-rate student film--I wouldn't be surprised if they were.

The cheap production values are as clear as day, but the film could've saved its integrity with a good script. Some of the dialogue is horribly laughable. But for $6.99, you often get what you pay for. At least it will serve as good filler for my extensive video collection.

My score: 4 (out of 10)

I have only seen the 'Line of Fire' version of this film, and it was frankly just unbearable. The acting from Charnota is awfully wooden and the rubbish lines they churn out just get worse (eg. "it's written all over your face like egg"). However the film is intriguing as it's probably De Niro's worst film, but despite this it has an interesting look and setting to it. With it's bleak, porno filled and gritty American streets it's a perfect setting for De Niro, particularly as he goes on to embody such settings in Taxi Driver, Raging Bull or even Sleepers. Theres also a nice seen on the beach where De Niro acts out a film he saw, and it's intercut as De Niro plays the shooter and the victim. This act is again like an incarnation of De Niro's later action of pretending to shoot himself (in the mirror) in Taxi Driver. However despite my fumbling attempts to find some good points to the film, it is terrible and very hard to watch as it's so bad. De Niro in the film is the better of the cast and perhaps the original 'Sam's Song' version is better.