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So-so musical with Howard Keel as an American coming to Tahiti to run a plantation he inherited. There he meets and immediately falls for a biracial Tahitian, played by Esther Williams. About as flimsy as they come, how much this entertains you will depend on how big a fan you are of the two stars. Keel sings a few decent songs and Esther has some nice swimming scenes. Both are great in their areas of expertise but their chemistry is nonexistent, so the romance aspect of the story falls flat. This was a troubled production that included a broken arm for Keel and a near-drowning incident for Esther. It also went way over budget and Esther found out she was pregnant during filming. The parts of the movie that were shot on location were shot in Hawaii, not Tahiti. The attractive scenery is certainly a plus, as is the short runtime. It's ultimately nothing special but if you enjoy handsome Keel's voice or beautiful Esther's swimming, you'll want to see it at least once. But be forewarned all that fake laughter gets old after awhile.

Generally considered the worst of the films created by MGM's legendary "Freed Unit," and probably not helped by the ineptitude of its inexperienced and temperamentally unsuited director, Robert Alton, it still boasts the incredible radiance of Esther Williams, and baby, can that gal radiate. Beautiful wet or dry, she's perfect for fluff of this pitch and though disparaged by Stanley Donen and Gene Kelly for her lack of talent (which they encountered in "Take Me Out to the Ball Game," she's still consummately professional. Would you want to see a film this dopey starring a Meryl Streep? I don't think so. Williams projects vitality, sexuality, life-force and intelligence as the Tahitian-American aristocrat mistaken for a local peasant by island newcomer Howard Keel. A better script might have toyed with this classic musical mix-up for its entire length, but this one disposes of it by Minute 25, leaving it nowhere else to go. What follows is beautiful scenery (Maui standing in for Tahiti), some unmemorable songs (mostly by the great Arthur Freed himself), a lot of racial condescension which will set your teeth to grinding, an underused 17-year-old Rita Moreno, plus somebody's idea of "native dancing" with color co-ordinated hula skirts. Keel is sunny. broad-shouldered and shallow, but Esther's buoyancy keeps the thing afloat and watchable. I have to say at one time Keel fantasizes about her, and imagines her in a water ballet. Hmmm, I know if I fantasized about her, it wouldn't be in no stinkin' water ballet!

The most minor of Arthur Freed's minor MGM musicals, and one suspects he took it on because it showcased his (rather pedestrian) lyrics. It's a Tahitian treat, by present-day standards astonishingly racist, with the happy, stupid natives bowing and doing the bidding of Howard Keel, an Ohio teacher who has inherited a dilapidated tropical estate, and Esther Williams, who keeps saying she's through-and-through Tahitian and has dusky makeup to back it up, but comes equipped with a Nebraska accent and seems incapable of playing anything but American. About the most dramatic thing that happens is it rains, and Keel and Williams squabble and make up, while a very young Rita Moreno schemes to get them back together. The two stars look terrific, Keel runs around shirtless most of the time, the Harry Warren melodies are very easy to take, and Esther's one underwater ballet displays Technicolor hues that will probably never be seen again. The storytelling's lazy and condescending, Robert Alton is not a natural-born director, and inconsequential doesn't begin to describe it. For all that, it's fun and tuneful and unpretentious, and you may even enjoy the over-simplistic world view of 1950.

When Pagan Love Song came out in 1950 it reflected the changing times and the fact that the movies were competing with television. Ten years earlier a film like this would have been done on MGM's backlot. But now in order to get the audiences to a film about the south seas, you had to show the real thing.

The film is lovely to look at without the plot getting too much in the way of the lovely Hawaiian scenery which substituted for Tahiti. My guess is that Tahiti probably was still recovering from the effects of World War II otherwise MGM might have shot the film there. In any event having been to Hawaii, I am of the firm opinion, further documented by Pagan Love Song that it is impossible to make an unattractive film in Hawaii.

The plot is real simple, Howard Keel is an American whose heard about the romantic south seas and wants to get away from it all. Esther Williams is a native Tahitian who'd just like to get to see some of the rest of the world. Howard has bought a copra plantation and he settles into the Tahitian ways very fast. Of course seeing Esther in a bathing suit swimming in the lagoon helped a lot.

One thing that should also be remembered is that at the time Pagan Love Song came out, the most popular musical on Broadway was South Pacific. That Rodgers&Hammerstein classic by itself created a market for a film like Pagan Love Song. I only wish the music were up to the standards of that show.

Arthur Freed did double duty in this film, serving as both producer and lyricist. He wrote original songs with Harry Warren, nothing terribly memorable and also it's his song with Nacio Herb Brown that serves as the title of the film. It was one of the earliest hits from the beginning of sound films.

Esther Williams as usual has some lovely water ballets. Of her it can truly be said, her like in Hollywood has not appeared again and is unlikely to.

Pagan Love Song is a pleasant piece of fluff entertainment, easy to look at with a plot not too taxing.

What a fascinating historical document, a dazzling Technicolor window into the hearts and desires of the American public, or at least what MGM was marketing to them in 1950! As long as today's viewer isn't expecting to see a gripping love story or the conflict that might occur when two radically different cultures attempt to meld, as long as plot or logic or suspense don't matter much, this musical document is amazingly entertaining! And perhaps it's entertainment value evolves from secondary values such as color and location and decent singing. It's not Mutiny On The Bounty!

I expect no one ever has watched an Esther Williams film for the intellectual challenge or for cutting edge plot development: first and foremost, we want to see Esther swim, to gloriously navigate the MGM waters as no one else has managed--in over a dozen films, this Million Dollar Mermaid dallied with her suitors, wore bathing suits perfectly, and ultimately proved who was boss in the romantic department, just as she does in this escapist delight. When Howard Keel sails into Tahiti (at the time there were no viable airfields accessible on Tahiti so the studio settled for Hawaii, and it's ravishing!), he mistakes Esther for a native swimmer, treats her with condescension and Esther goes along with the joke until she can turn the tables on him.

In the meantime, Howard learns how to live more gregariously with the local natives, a happy lot who seldom challenge his ways, and who are always happy to run off to a luau or a beach party when there's coconut to be husked. There are a couple of lavish MGM showpieces here, one of them a staged cellophaned hula extravaganza featuring dazzling hula action and a performer who utilizes his body as a percussion instrument: it's a frenzied five minutes!! And wait until you see the mind- boggling Dali-esque underwater fantasy ballet, a trip through a bright coral wonderland peppered with golden flashes from the local fishies!

Had Stanley Donen, director of such gems as Singin' In The Rain and Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, been allowed to direct, this might have been one of Esther's best--but she had suffered under his indifferent attitude toward her talents on Take Me Out To The Ball Game, and she refused to work with him, so the studio provided Robert Alton. Fortunately, we are spared Red Skelton or the other usual guest appearances which hamper the pace, and we are gifted with actual lush photography from the island of what appears to be Kauai for a 50's time warp, a zippy escape from any kind of reality.