La novia del monstruo

This really isn't such a terrible little movie. Sure, it's cheap, the acting is horrible, the sets wobble if sneezed upon and the special effects consist of stock footage and a rubber octopus, but "Bride of the Monster" is much, MUCH better than "Plan 9 From Outer Space."

Mad scientist Vornoff (a sickly Bela Lugosi) has apparently set up shop in the Florida Everglades, kidnapping anyone unwise enough to wander too close to his house (and his pet octopus) and conducting sinister experiments upon them. Vornoff, for some odd reason, is determined to create a race of super giants with incredible strength. We're never really sure exactly WHY he wants to do this, but one can only assume that, if one possesses an army of super strong giants, one could take over the world and rule it and stuff. That seems to be the goal of every other mad scientist in the unruled world, anyway. Into this diabolical plan stumbles loudmouthed newsgirl Loretta King, who is determined to get the story on the Lake Marsh Monster. Whether the title of "Lake Marsh Monster" refers to the octopus, Tor Johnson as the fumbling Lobo or Bela's drug problem, we're never sure. Take your pick. Anyway, Loretta is kept under constant hypnosis by Bela's eyebags and is slated to become The Bride of the Monster! By this point, we're all quite ready to see the annoying Loretta fried to a crisp, but unfortunately, her wimpy boyfriend shows up to save her. The stunning climax is packed full of raging Lobo's, rolling boulders, lightening bolts, gunfire and death by octopus!

The story doesn't make much sense, but were you really expecting it to when you saw Ed Wood's name listed under the title of director? Still and all, it's certainly Wood's most coherent effort and can be entertaining for those of us who stop to look at road accidents.

Bride of the Monster (1955)

*** (out of 4)

Cult classic from Edward D. Wood, Jr. about a mad scientist (Bela Lugosi), his over-sized assisstant (Tor Johnson) and their pet rubber octopuss. Only God really knows how many of these "Z" grade films I've seen over the years but there's no doubt in my mind that Wood's movies are the "best" of the bunch. The worst thing that could happen while watching this stuff is that you get bored but with Wood, and especially this film, boredom isn't a possibility since there's countless insane moments happening throughout the 69-minute running time. The film moves by very quickly and while I do enjoy the movie because it's bad, I will go out on the limb and say Lugosi gives his best performance in his later day roles.

Bride of the Monster is the best of Ed Wood's films. Frankly compared with Scared to Death and the Devil Bat-- the film truly looks like a masterpiece -- and truth be told it isn't that bad. In fact, it is rather enjoyable. Okay, I am gonna admit it -- I like it! If you look past the cheesy octopus (no worse than the hysterical devil bat), the cheap sets and the lame acting (better than Scared to Death!), if you suspend a little disbelief and realize this movie was made for a song -- then actually it is pretty darned good. One reason for this is that Bela Lugosi gets ample screen time. If Ed Wood was a bit unimaginative, he at least knew what it was that made Lugosi a legend and reprises little details, from the mad scientific leering of the Devil Bat to the idiosyncratic hand gestures of White Zombie. Bela is given a chance to shine in his final starring performance and shine he does. The movie has its flaws, but Bela is not one of them. He is old and looks weak, but he carries the movie like a true champion. He makes empty dialog sound meaningful and implausible scenarios seem poignant (well almost poignant).

Lugosi's "I have no home" monolog is beautiful. He could make dialog such as "I have proven that I am alright!" sound good. Lugosi gives his all in his last performance, and it is a great performance, even if he does have to wrestle with a fake octopus.

This is a B feature movie (which goes without saying!), but the movie really isn't that bad. As another has commented about the "Bride of the Monster", Lugosi simply had a screen presence and was an watchable actor. Sure, it's a little hammy in parts, but both Wood's dialog and Lugosi's rendition are nowhere near as bad as folks make out (if you want to see badly acted and improbable dialog, attend any student movie season). Generally the dialog flows quite well. Given that this was Wood's second feature, and that he had no real technical apprenticeship for film-making, he did good. If he had been able to make more movies, who knows what the rest would have turned out like. So I savor these early Wood movies as the start of something that could have been even better, and as inspiration for not giving up in the face of no budget; he did have talent.

Okay...lets be honest. This film was just what is was expected to be: a poorly made film with little to no budget, terrible acting overall, a script that borders on insanity, and special effects that children in a school play could be proud of. Yet, the film has a certain charm to it and is a vehicle in which to see both Bela Lugosi and Tor Johnson madly overact and interact. Bela whipping Johnson and then getting into a wrestling match is definitely a high point. The rest of the cast strive to be mediocre...and fail...with the exception of character actor Harvey Dunn. Dunn plays the police chief and is humorous both intentionally and unintentionally. Watch his scenes and see him play with his parakeet in his office. It defies logic, time, and space...and is funny. Not Ed Woods best or worse...and a film that really has been given a boost by Tim Burton's Ed Wood. A fun picture to sit through with a group.