The Girl Said No

Preposterous and silly, the early talkie comedy, "The Girl Said No," depends on the charms of its handsome star, William Haines, and on a short scene-stealing turn by Marie Dressler. The irrepressible Haines plays his usual over-confident flamboyant self in the guise of Tom Ward, a young man just back from college. To the dismay of his parents, he has more interest in partying and pursuing girls than job hunting. Oozing charm and optimism throughout, Haines goes to ridiculous lengths to win Leila Hyams, who is the girl who says no. Perhaps the film should have been titled "The Man Never Hears No," because Haines blithely ignores rejection and perseveres, much as he did in film after film throughout his career. Oh, a setback here and there, a lesson learned, a smart aleck chastened, but Haines always gets the girl, and his pearly whites gleam in a dazzling smile at every fadeout.

If the boyish attributes of Mr. Haines fail to engage, perhaps Dressler's tipsy curmudgeon will. Although again totally foolish, Haines, who looks bemused throughout the often-hilarious scene with Dressler, manages to impersonate a doctor and inebriate the old toughie during a sales pitch for Denver bonds. Don't ask why or how, because nothing in the film makes any sense if examined from closer than a mile. While "The Girl Said No" is less-than-classic movie-making, director Sam Wood keeps the plot moving breezily, and the actors hamming shamelessly. Unfortunately, Haines and Dressler alone rise above the proceedings, and the audience may laugh fitfully if at all.

Winsome graduate William Haines (as Tom Ward) comes home, intending to enter the job market, while retaining his college lifestyle. Mr. Haines is accustomed fast cars, frequent parties, and women who don't say "No!" While seeking employment at "Sutton & Co.", Haines flips over pretty blonde secretary Leila Hyams (as Mary Howe). But, the otherwise engaged Ms. Hyams wants nothing to do with the graduate. Although "The Girl Said No", Haines refuses to give up...

The Haines formula film, with sound, rang up the cash register for MGM. This film was the most profitable of the 1930 hits which propelled William Haines to the top of the box office charts. For the year 1930, he was the US #1 Male "Box Office Star", according to the industry standard list, complied by Quigley Publications. "The Girl Said No" finds Haines graduating from college at a later age than most (he's about the same age as Dustin Hoffman in "The Graduate"). Haines' fine voice, comic timing, and physicality make the most of a weak, inappropriate, story...

Highlights are Haines' driving Hyams crazy in his car, especially when she tries to drive away without him; and, a terrific extended session with Haines posing as Marie Dressler's doctor. Ms. Dressler (as Hettie Brown) is hilarious; and, the two play extremely well together. Polly Moran also appears, as Haines' loyal housekeeper. Haines and Moran don't have as much to do; but, the rapport between Haines and both women should have had producers looking for a suitable co-starring vehicle. The other cast members perform well (and stay out of Haines' way)...

Haines has some fine moments throughout, and shares a classic scene with Dressler...

******* The Girl Said No (3/15/30) Sam Wood ~ William Haines, Leila Hyams, Marie Dressler, Polly Moran

Haines was a top star from late 20s thru early 30s. He sailed from silent films into talkies and remained a star til he ran afoul of Louis B. Mayer. He is hilarious in The Girl Said No, starring in the "Haines formula" type of film: brash young man takes nothing seriously until tragedy hits, then he turns himself around and succeeds. Here he is a college boy returning to his wealthy home and causing riotous problems wherever he goes. Pop gets him job after job but he fails at all of them because he has fallen for pretty Leila Hyams. Plot is OK, but Haines is the whole show. There was never anyone quite like Haines, a comic actor who was not really a comic. His comedy is much broader than anything Cary Grant or Robert Montgomery did. Very funny film that co-stars the always funny Polly Moran, Clara Blandick, William Janney, Francis X. Bushman, Jr., Henry Armetta as the hapless waiter, and as mentioned elsewhere, the hysterical scene with Haines and Marie Dressler. Too bad Haines is all but forgotten. He was a wonderful star and one of a kind.

Girl Said No, The (1930)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

I'm not sure how many people know this but William Haines made three films in 1930 and they were so popular that he was voted the most popular actor of the year. This was Haines first talkie after years in the silent era where he played obnoxious brats who would do anything to get his way. In this film, he plays an obnoxious brat who returns home from college and refuses to settle down in any way, shape or form. He reluctantly gets a job where he falls in love with the secretary (Lelia Hyams) but she wants nothing to do with him so he decides to bug her to death, kidnap her and torture her some more. Okay, we all know that THE JAZZ SINGER was released in 1927 and it pretty much had people wondering if silents would ever be needed again. I always point to 1928's THE WIND as proof that movies didn't need sound. This film here is my second bit of evidence in this theory because Haines is so downright obnoxious that you'll with the film was silent so you wouldn't have to hear him. Apparently MGM also released this in a silent version and I wouldn't mind seeing it because what we've got here is pretty bad on all levels. I'd almost recommend people to watch this just to see how bad it actually is. There are a couple good moments so I'll get them out of the way now. There's a pretty funny sequence where Haines pays a waiter to throw some onion soup on his rival (Francis X. Bushman, Jr.). Bushman, Jr. himself is pretty good here and there's also another decent sequence with Marie Dressler towards the end of the movie. Now, for the bad, which is pretty much everything else. For starters, Haines is so obnoxious that you won't be able to not hate him. Not only is the actor himself way too over the top but his character is such a mean jerk that you want to see him beaten to a pulp. That's not a good feeling to have for the lead actor. The scenes with him pretty much forcing himself on the girl and kidnapping her doesn't work because of how much we hate him. Hyams isn't any better as the female lead but the less said the better. The technical side of the film is also quite poor as there are several sequences with the actors moving where it becomes quite hard to understand what they're saying as they move further away from the mic. The opening sequence at the house is also pretty ugly to watch as several of the actors in the frame have their heads cut off. The biggest sin of this turkey is that there's just not enough laughs to carry a 91-minute movie. Perhaps had this been 60 or 65 minutes then it might have worked but not at this long time. It's worth noting that there's a joke where one character says he doesn't understand why people would be against birth control in regards to Haines. I'm not sure how many films this early mentioned birth control but the quote itself is something I have to agree with in regards to this character.

During the 1920s, William Haines made a string of films with very, very similar themes. In films such as BROWN OF HARVARD and THE SMART SET, he played a smug braggart that was immensely talented but needed to learn humility. He always found this out after he disappointed the team with his boorish behavior. However, late in the films, a humbler Haines then learns what it means to be self-sacrificing--once again allowing him to be the hero--and so ended each picture.

By the 1930s, Haines was essentially doing the same roles he'd done for years. The big difference was that with the advent of sound pictures, he not only acted conceited but you could hear him talking non-stop about himself--making people like me wish he'd stayed in silent films! Additionally, by the time he did THE GIRL SAID NO, his character had also changed--and not for the better. In the earlier films he was conceited but immensely talented. However in THE GIRL SAID NO, he was essentially an annoying idler with nothing to back up his boasting but his "charming personality". Well, to me this personality was not at all charming and I just wanted to bust him in the mouth!! An unlikable and sociopathic jerk is what he was in this film (such as sexually harassing a girl repeatedly, acting cruelly to everyone he came in contact with and risking others' lives) and I found myself loathing every second he was on film. This is quite a change, as I had liked many of his earlier films, but by this awful film he was simply too unlikable, too brash, too talkative, too selfish and just too much! Watching him was like watching an obnoxious four year-old who insists on entertaining guests--whether they want to or not!!

I've gotta admit something before I close. This is the first Haines film I didn't finish. I tried, believe me, but I simply hated the sight and sound of him and couldn't take it any more. I know that according to formula, by the end of the film he'll have changed, but I wasn't willing to wait plus someone this awful really won't change in real life.

I read a book some time ago about leading men at MGM and it said how Haines' career ended because Louis B. Mayer was a homophobe and pushed him out of films. I used to believe it, but with films like THE GIRL SAID NO, I am more inclined to believe that Haines just overstayed his welcome. With him performing essentially the same role again and again (and the character getting more obnoxious as the years passes), it's no wonder he was out of the business by the mid-1930s. I truly, truly hated him in this film and would rather gargle with glass then see it to the end!!