- [last lines]
- Dave: Gosh, all the fightin' and worryin' people do; it always seems to be about one thing. They don't seem to trust each other... Well, I've found this out: Don't look for trouble where there isn't any, because if you don't find it, you'll make it... Just believe in someone.
- Party Guest with Herbert: [looking laciviously at Whitey as she dances past him] Gentlemen, I fear that even I could give that little lady dictation.
- Mimi: My dear, men are like that. So honorable and able and wise in some things and just like naughty children in others. You wouldn't blame a little boy for stealing a piece of candy if left alone in a room with a whole boxful, would you?
- Van: There's an old Chinese proverb that says if you want to keep a man honest, never call him a liar.
- Linda: The world's divided into two kinds of people: those who believe that bow tie ends should be sticking out, and those who don't. Personally, I'm very tolerant, ask anybody. But anyone who believes a bow tie end should stick out should be deported from this country.
- Van: I'm sorry, boys. I got some work to do.
- Mr. Bakewell: Come on, Frawley. We've been thrown out of better offices.
- Frawley: Where they had better scotch!
- Van: You gals certainly stick together. You know, you'd rather see Whitey promoted than to see me comfortable.
- Linda: It's really my own comfort I'm thinking of. Do you know that I sat next to a young lady tonight that didn't know I was Mrs. Stanhope and was convinced that Whitey was one of *those* secretaries.
- Van: What? Did somebody say that?
- Van: They're not going to get very far trying to sell a two dollar jar of cold cream in a five cent magazine.
- Mimi: You know, my dear, I've seen much more of the world than you have - and more of the Stanhope men. Van is very like his father: warm-hearted, impulsive, active... and temptation ought not to be put in their way.
- Linda: Mimi, darling, all Van's life is spent with attractive women... not only Miss Wilson, but the girls who model dresses, the lovely actresses whose pictures he runs.
- J.D. Underwood: You have to admit its an idea.
- Van: Why, it's flabbergasting!
- J.D. Underwood: Well, it takes an old flabbergaster like me, to make you smart youngsters know that you haven't got all the ideas in the world.
- Van: [singing] Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag, And smile, smile, smile, While you've a lucifer to light your fag, Smile, boys, that's the style, Oh what's the use of worrying? It never was worth while...
- Van: What'd you want?
- Linda: Oh, nothing.
- Van: Come on, now. What was it you wanted to tell me?
- Linda: It's too late. I won't talk now.
- Van: Well, probably wasn't anything important.
- Linda: Well, you're not going to get it out of me that way.
- Van: Well, what'd you want to tell me?
- Linda: Oh, the mood's gone. It's all different now.
- Van: Oh, it is, huh? The mood's gone? Eh? The mood's gone, eh? It is? Mmm-hmm.
- [kisses Linda on the lips]
- Van: You know, the first time you bid three spades tonight, I am definitely going to break that lovely little neck of yours.
- [kisses Linda's neck]
- Linda: Who's that with him?
- Party Guest: His *"secretary"*.
- Linda: He's married, isn't he?
- Party Guest: So is my husband, but his secretary's 40, if she's a day.
- Helen 'Whitey' Wilson: Oh, what fun. You know, next year I'd like to surprise them and do some figure skating.
- Dave: Yeah, your figure was doing all right.
- Helen 'Whitey' Wilson: What do you mean?
- Dave: It went over pretty big with Stanhope, didn't it?
- Helen 'Whitey' Wilson: Darling, you're kidding, aren't you?
- Dave: I told you once that knowin' millionaires like him spoiled you.
- Van: You probably think I'm drunk, don't you?
- Helen 'Whitey' Wilson: No.
- Van: Well, you should; because, I am.
- Van: Is it still wet?
- Helen 'Whitey' Wilson: Yes, it is.
- Van: No! I don't think so. No, it must be dry by now. No, it's still wet.
- Edna Wilson: What's that?
- Tom Wilson: Nothing. I said nothing.
- Edna Wilson: No. Say it a little louder, dear, and stop hinting. All you have to do to get a divorce in this family is just say the word.
- Tom Wilson: I know. For the last 10 years I've been trying to find that word.
- Helen 'Whitey' Wilson: This is his idea of wearing the pants in the family.
- Dave: If and when you ever trick me into marrying you, dear, *I'll* wear the pants.
- J.D. Underwood: Van, I've got a brand new kind of a steam cabinet some fellow in Belgium invented and I tell you I'm like a kid with a toy.
- Van: You know, I haven't had a good steam bath in a year.
- J.D. Underwood: Van, enough beatin' about the bush. What are you tryin' to put over on me?
- Van: J.D., did anybody ever put anything over on you in your entire life?
- J.D. Underwood: Well, you're not far wrong.
- J.D. Underwood: Well, you're a clever young gamecock, Van, but I'm not so old a bird that I'm afraid to stay in the pit with you.
- Mrs. Anne Barker: Our butcher sends us the most inconsiderate chickens. We never have chicken livers like this!