- [title card]
- [title card]: Rollo Treadway - Heir to the Treadway fortune - a living proof that every family tree must have its sap... Buster Keaton.
- [title card]
- [title card]: He had completed all arrangements - except to notify the girl.
- [Rollo shakes Betsy's hand and presents her with a bouquet]
- Rollo Treadway: Will you marry me?
- Betsy O'Brien: Certainly not!
- Rollo Treadway: [to the servant] I think I'll get married.
- [Servant responds briefly before Rollo turns his attention back to the portrait of Betsy]
- Rollo Treadway: [to himself] Today.
- [first title card]
- [first title card]: Our story deals with one of those queer tricks that Fate sometimes plays.
- Rollo Treadway: Land!
- Betsy O'Brien: Cannibals!
- Rollo Treadway: [nods] We're safer on the boat.
- Betsy O'Brien: We're drifting toward them.
- [both run off to anchor the ship]
- [last title card]
- [last title card]: Where ignorance is bliss ...
- [first lines]
- Leader of a small gathering: Gentlemen, the enemy have just purchased the steamship Navigator.
- [Walks over to open the double doors, and gestures to a vessel outside]
- Leader of a small gathering: There she lies now, and it is our patriotic duty to destroy that ship. We will send her adrift in the fog tonight before the new crew goes aboard. The wind - the tide - and the rocks will do the rest.
- Rollo Treadway: Will you marry me?
- Betsy O'Brien: [shakes her head] No. This is a fine time to ask me that. I'm cold and hungry and -...
- Wilfred Green: [On the Victrola] Danger is near thee - Many brave hearts are asleep in the Deep - B E W A R E
- [last lines]
- Rollo Treadway: We are sinking! It's just a matter of time until we're captured.
- Betsy O'Brien: Can't you fix it?
- Rollo Treadway: [shakes his head] That would have to be fixed from the outside.
- [title card]: Going on a honeymoon without a bride is like singing the words of "Kiss Me Again" to the music of "Alice, Where Art Thou."