0000: A Shark Odyssey

0000: A Shark Odyssey is insane. If you were a middle school teacher and told your entire class to make a movie each on their own, none of them would turn out even close to the horrendousness of this failed attempt at art. It features characters talking so slowly that you can go to the next grocery store without missing anything, the acting is so devoid of any emotion that it physically hurts, the lack of different voices for different characters makes it incredibly hard to follow, the plot is non-existent, the "animation" looks like someone was bored with Microsoft Paint, the musical numbers might make you deaf for the rest of your life, scenes go on and on to the point of absurdity, the puns would make any dad joke lover facepalm, and the post-credits noise would make the most devoted Atheist pray to God to just make it end. The movie is cocky, it claims to have a point of social importance. The whole thing is just an excuse for the director's original songs. It is a 91 minute movie that feels like five hours, and I love every bit of it. This has to be seen to be believed! I emplore you all to watch and rate this movie, it's freely available on the director's YouTube channel. 0000: A Shark Odyssey is EASILY worse than classics like The Room and Birdemic. It's truly unique and extraordinary.

It takes a certain lack of care about embarrassing yourself to make a "movie" this awful. This director's vanity project is 90 minutes of absolutely nothing at all. Apart from a scene where a crappy drawing spins around its center veeeeery slowly and moves from one corner to the opposite one and back with no sound for two whole minutes, and apart from scene transitions, there's isn't any movement. The scenes are completely random, and apart from the "characters" mentioning they're going to work, and a "boss" appearing later, they have absolutely nothing to do with one another. Even in isolation, it's impossible to make sense of anything that's going on, because the still pictures accompanying each scene are impossible to make out, and in every scene it's just one single actor reading out all lines in a row. Oh, and this movie has original "songs". They are just as terrible as the rest of this movie. What a great idea! The director was looking for a way to promote his songs, and inserted them into this stalevie.

Don't put yourself through this horror. I recommend RaisorBlade's review if this film though. You won't miss anything important. Also, considering that RaisorBlade will be in Iki Eneng's next film, I would die to know how much he's been paid...

Introduction:

0000: A Shark Odyssey doesn't make any sense. It's badly animation, badly voice acted, and thinks it's more than it actually is. It's easily, the worst film of 2018.

The Story:

The story was spawned from an interesting idea. The idea of making a shark movie that centers around the sharks. As the creator of the film was tired of sharks being portrayed as killing machines, even though they only kill six people a year. And the film is about humans hunting sharks. At least that's what I discovered reading the plot summary on IMDb.

I didn't get that at all from this film. It's just random, boring scenes, that I can't follow. It has no story, it also has original songs, that sounds like nothing but jumbled noise.

For a film that's only a little over an hour, it feels like it goes on forever. And this is coming from somebody who loves Satantango (a seven hour movie). Believe me when I say this film is boring.

The Animation:

The animation is horrible. It's literally crappy drawings on a black background. The characters models are impossible to make out and you can't tell who is who. And it's just overall atrocious to look at.

Conclusion:

This is a descent idea, turned into a horrible attempt at art. Only 28 people have reviewed the film at this point, and I'm glad no one else has watched the film. And considering the impressively low 1.6 rating, the few people that have seen it, must agree with my review.

Couldn't even watch 30 full seconds... It isn't anything.