Apocalypse Rising

Total crap movie. Must have used two paychecks from wally world to make this one.

Not quite the styled review as the attention seeker before me, but it is dead on.

Terrible,, cheese monkey,,, you know when you've been tango'ed. Whaaaaaa. it's a slap to the face and the big fellea runs off down the street. Takeing your sanity with him as you wounder why the hell did I even press play....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..

I mainly wrote this because my first thought after watching this glorious mess was that whether or not it was trying to be ironically terrible, it was still better than Fox's last Fantastic Four movie - I would rather have given someone that $20 to kick me in the groin repeatedly with a boot covered in syphilis riddled rusted razor blades than to the theatre I paid to take in that steaming pile. I gave this a 2 because it provided mild amusement that I loathe myself for. I couldn't tell if this knew it was horri-awful, and was going for that, but it certainly was, and definitely got there, intentionally or not. I think this would be a real beauty on a night where you look to set a personal best in edible dosage.

You know how some movies are so bad that they are good? This movie was so bad that it gave me diarrhea

Like A Million Ways to Die in the West, Meet the Spartans, and dozens of other campy humor spoofs, this is what I call a college kid movie that anyone with a quirky sense of humor can enjoy. Yes, it's campy. Yes it's silly. Yes it's entertaining, maybe not as much as the ones I listed above, but still fun to watch with your buds.