The Last Heist

Heat, Heist, Ocean's 11, The Score. Some great heist movies. Then there's "The Last Heist", which has Henry Rollins in it. You'd think that a man who's so opinionated, is a recognized actor, musician, man of thought would make sure what he's starring in is a decent film. Unfortunately either Henry is out of money, or so desperate to be in a movie that he'll take anything.

A promising beginning, a confrontation between sketchy van driver and Rollins set the stage for a possibly interesting watch. Unfortunately this movie is so cookie cutter, with every cheesy cliché line you can imagine written in. It's so cliché I couldn't even watch another minute past about 20 of them.

The script itself isn't very good, its exacerbated by powerful, powerful overacting by women whom I assume are very good on the casting couch, as based on their talent, I wouldn't cast them in a tampon commercial.

Amazingly enough this dog seems to be a straight to video release. I can't see anyone paying for a seat for this.

The idea of the criminal mess that's about to happen in this vault is actually good, but that's all. The acting is poor, really poor, the scenes are cheap, it ruins everything, so I can't recommend the movie, but it gets 4 stars for the idea and because of the fact I've seen worst, way worst.

Part of me was intrigued before watching 'The Last Heist'. It sounded interesting with a great concept. Was also rather apprehensive, considering its critical panning. Saw 'The Last Heist' anyway out of curiosity, having seen my fair share of low-budget films recently, liking a good deal of heist films and liking the idea.

'The Last Heist' started off pretty well, giving off the sense that maybe the film won't be bad and be better than it seemed. The best thing about it is Henry Rollins, whose performance is effectively skin crawling as the only halfway interesting character in the whole thing and that it wasn't in a much better film is something of a sad waste.

On a visual level, 'The Last Heist' looked shoddy and like it ran out of money and time very early on. Drab and simplistic, with haphazard editing, far from slick photography and very artificial-looking visuals on the whole. The sets are confined and simple, but the simplicity is taken to extremes and it looks limited.

The sound/soundtrack are intrusive and obvious with no variation and the direction has no sense of atmosphere or pacing, nothing to be thrilled by and nothing much engaging.

Script is awkward-sounding and ponderous, with lines that do make one cringe, even Rollins' is not much to write home about, just your standard clichéd villain lines. A lot of it is gibberish and juvenile, with a stilted improvisatory feel that shouldn't have made it past draft stages.

On top of that, the story goes through the motions with no tension, suspense or thrills, a lot of intelligence-insulting ridiculousness, implausibility and pacing so dull that it makes a reasonably short length much longer. For an idea as good as here, nothing new is done here.

Characters are basically every stereotype in the book it seems and are one-dimensional caricatures with no likeability or development and with the inability to behave logically. The acting is very poor all round other than Rollins.

In summary, very lame apart from Rollins and the ok start. 3/10 Bethany Cox

Don't waste your time! 1.5 hours of total garbage and they want at least 10 lines of review where I have the difficulty of writing even one line. Don't waste your time! It tells the tale of a gang of unlucky bank robbers who, mid-job, find themselves trapped on the premises with a serial killer who gleefully embraces the opportunity to slaughter a smorgasbord of new victims. The psycho, Bernard, dubbed "The Windows Killer" due to his propensity to remove the eyes of his victims—he takes quite literally the idea that they're the window to the soul—is played by Henry Rollins. Clad in a nondescript dark suit, Clark Kent-style glasses and sporting a gray buzz cut, the rocker/spoken word artist/actor is supremely creepy as the deceptively calm madman who has mastered his craft. After slashing one unlucky robber's femoral artery, he authoritatively informs her, "I estimate you have 9 minutes to live," although not without adding the caveat, "I'm no doctor." After eagerly inquiring how it feels to have the life draining out of your body, he considerately points out, "I'm not laughing at you…I'm laughing with you."

This movie is a waste of time. The acting is subpar. The actors are melodramatic. The basic actions of the police are dumb. If you are taking fire you call for backup. You don't just keep delivering your poorly written lines. Get some basic firearm training for your cop actors. I saw a cop trying to throw bullets out of his gun. This movie in concept had the possibility of being really cool. Rollins did a great job of being creepy but the mess going on around him really wrecked his performance. I would say as long as you don't pay a dime to watch this movie aka wait till it hits Netflix. Then it is worth a couple hrs of your time.