Jack Smith - The King Of Horror

It is very hard to imagine a remake actually improving upon the original film, impossible even. But Werner Herzog's remake of the silent classic "Nosferatu" is the exception to this rule. The film is everything you could dream of. Scary, surreal, touching, atmospheric and breathtaking with all these elements in almost perfect harmony.

Lawyer Jonathan Harker travels to the castle of Count Dracula in the Carpathian Mountains, despite the warnings of his beloved wife Mina. Despite the warnings of the locals living in the shadow of the castle, he continues on his journey. When he arrives at the castle he disturbed and terrorised by the grotesque, rat-like Count Dracula. Having driven Harker insane the Count falls in love with his wife Mina and travels across the sea to claim her bringing hordes of rats, plague and pestilence with him. Distraught at the condition of her beloved husband, Mina deceides to put pay to the Counts evil once and for all.

This film drastically re-invents the whole Dracula story, which has been choked by countless campy Hammer Horror films restoring fear and loathing to the character. This is boosted by the amazing performance of Klaus Kinski as the count infusing the character with a great sense of pity as well as revulsion. Kinski will always be to my mind the greatest of all screen Dracula's and this will always be to my mind one of the most accomplished vampire films ever.

If there is one fault of the film it is that Herzog tends to make the film a bit too visual for its own good, undermining the brilliance of the performances.

Overall though this is a terrific film.

My Rating: 8 Out Of 10

I had never really been `in' to BEAVIS & BUTTHEAD so to speak; I had seen the movie BEAVIS & BUTTHEAD DO AMERICA during 1997 on its UK cinema run. It was a funny film. Three years passed and I totally forgot about it, then last summer a very good friend of mine taped an episode of the re-runs on cable. We sat down and watched it and our sides almost split! It was hysterical. The program reminded me of what it was like to laugh so much you almost passed out from exhaustion. Together we watched more and more and more episodes, taping them off cable and buying cheap videos of the show and re-visiting the movie. BEAVIS & BUTTHEAD is truly the most outlandish TV show ever, you can always bet that every episode will feature at least one moment that will make you cry with laughter. The actions of the two protagonists are so moronic you are left open mouthed with laughter, shock and dismay. All-time highlights include.

1) The duo sits drawing dead people in the classroom. Beavis has a trademark maniac fit screaming, `Massacre!!! Massacre!!! Maaaaaaaasssaaaacrrreeee!!!!!!!!'

2) Beavis puts his hand in the cage of a mad dog (inevitable outcome)

3) Butthead plays with the telephone creating a bleep then bellows `Kirk To Scotty! Kirk To Scotty! I need more speed … Bunghole!'

4) Beavis informs Butthead he left `a surprise' in the bed

5) His computer starts over heating so Beavis throws a glass of water over it.

6) The Christmas Special – Beavis working at a homeless centre (wearing a hairnet)

7) Any bit involving `Cornholio'.

There are many more that I will not list here, as it would spoil the show. I'll just keep it simple. BEAVIS & BUTTHEAD is the greatest cartoon show of its era. A classic mixture of stupidity, vile toilet humour, bungholes, sly digs at MTV Generation culture and total hilarity. A winner!!! Huh Huh Huh Huh!!!

I AM THE GREAT CORNHOLIO!!! HE HE HE!!! ARE YOU THREATENING ME? YOU WILL BOW DOWN TO THE ALMIGHTY BUNGHOLE!!!!

BUNGHOLLLIOOOO!!!!!!

Sorry I just had to get that out of my system. My rating – 10 out of 10 (of course)!!!

For years I have wanted to see this film. It is very difficult to find on video in England, which is surprising considering the cult status of the film. When I finally obtained the film in mint condition I was quite disappointed. The plot concerns a clean cut All-American family who leave the road and trek across the desert in search of a Silver mine (as if rational people would do something this idiotic). They find themselves on a bomb testing range which happens to be inhabited by a wild family of cannibals who attack the family once it goes dark. With half of the family dead the family resort to the same savagery as their cannibal counterparts in order to stay alive. THE HILLS HAVE EYES is a very well made film, with a doubtful but imaginative premise. Just one problem - it's simply not very scary. The cannibal villains are pretty crap and are often more funny than anything else. The film eventually resorts to typical Seventies exploitation tactics as people get burned, shot, blown up and raped, plus a dog gets dismembered, but even scenes seem tame after all this time. Infact the film seems like a commercialised, toned down variation of the director - Wes Craven's debut feature, THE LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT. Overall THE HILLS HAVE remains one of the key horror movies of the late seventies, but in my view it is either vastly over-rated or has aged VERY badly. The final verdict? THE HILLS HAVE EYES is just another average horror movie, no more, no less. My Rating - 6 Out Of 10.